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Updated: 2018-03-06T02:19:54.948-08:00


two post combined and a bit of a ramble....


. A little fence jumping=no prob! Mason found the best seat=basket First thing, a big shout out to Todd...Good luck tomorrow in the race...he is on a 2week journey... first stop Germany and then off to Switzerland for the Ironman there...yip 2 Ironmans back to back...he never stops and I say a NO THANK YOU to that =) he can be the crazy one!!SOOOO that leaves me solo parent for it time for school to start yet???? Just kidding, it is actually going OK, other than living on soccer and softball Fields and the twisted cold weather we are having!! I was planning on being pool side everyday...well that ain't happening ;(Yesterday I started off in a bit of a depression/rut I just wanted to cry and I was being mean to the kids....I hate when I get like that, but some days I can't help it....I had to just stop my piss ass mood and realize somethings/emotions are out of my control and not worth the pity party, plus it was Firework night and I did not want to ruin it for the kids....I somehow snapped out of it and the kids and my mother-in-law and I were off to have a good you can see in the photo's we did :) We started off at our main station and reserved our viewing spot and then here comes our little adventure....this year they moved the rides to a different location..that didn't stop us, we decided to go on a little mile adventure to find the rides Me, Grandma and 7 crazy kids Jumped fences...6 of them to be busted by the cops, just in time for them to witness me jumping over a fence with heels on and lost a shoe in the fence..I had the "oh shit" look on my face and they had the "serious" look...but then they laughed at me and were impressed that I managed with heels=) The kids keep calling me the slow old it took me a little longer to get over.....I think the cops thought we were all drunk as we could not stop laughing!!We reached the rides with the sneak in approach(by jumping fences)....hey it saved me $40.00...damn I am turning my kids into criminals already......well that is what they get for changing the rides location...I was NOT paying both places to get in...STIFF!!!!We all had an awesome time..the fireworks were great and the fatty food was awesome...the VERY loud music was a bit annoying but the drunks and kids seemed to like it =) I LOVE days like that..seeing the huge smiles on kids faces....sometimes we need to get out of our piss mood and just enjoy.......Kids spent the night with Grandparents...wahhhhooooo...I slept in until 10...I CAN"T remember when I have done that....then to top my day off I went for my FIRST run in a month....The doc wanted me to take some time off and I will start therapy on the knee when Todd gets is too hectic right now...SO I headed out for a 10 mile run...first two miles I was wasting too much time with my costume malfunction...I wore these cute little Asics shorts that smokin hot body Desiree Ficker had on the cover of Triathlete.....well they look cute but man my "JUNK" was hanging out everywhere..I wasted so much time tucking my gut in and pulling wedgies, so my butt cheeks weren't showing....That got old I just wanted to RUN...I said screw it..I don't care who sees my cheeks...I am enjoying this dang RUN....Mission accomplished some pain, but managed!!! It felt good to be back!!Hope everyone is having an awesome 4th weekend...... [...]

Luckily I can laugh at myself "Training day turns into survival"


AWESOME =) This is ALL I wanted!!!CLUELESS=DORK =)YIP helmet on backwards!Going out!!The Family =)I HAD to keep telling myself it is "just a training day" don't think of any "great times"....with about 7 pool-swims....4 bike rides in (since last July) and injured knee with my runs turning into walking...I had to keep telling myself it is OK...but many time I felt I had NO business being out there with my lack of training..I HURT HURT body is sooo feeling it today..I have never been this sore after a race....I can honestly say the ONLY thing on my body that doesn't hurt is my finger nails =) even my hair was a matted mess and I had to cut knots out, so even sore head!!!! does that happen???The killer swim all I have to say is 1:01 could you have a blasting time with that swim time=) What is wrong with me.....IF I didn't have my kids...I would have QUIT...if you don't know...I panic in open water swims and CAN NOT put my face in the water..and I mean not even for one second..I swim that whole freakin swim bobbing up and down...well this time I really didn't think I was going to make it...the waves were at some points 3 ft and I sucked in so much water which lead me to puke 3 times and I was breathing so heavy my goggles steamed up I had no clue where I was going and went of course tons...I am out there ALONE :( towards the middle of the swim I thought my race chip was coming loose so I started treading water and reached down to tighten it...BIG calve muscles started cramping...I did NOT know what to do...I thought for sure I was going under...I even yelled for a boat..but nobody was around...after that swim I don't know if I EVER want to swim kids and nO boat kept me going....The bike..(after the swim) check the photo above....DORK...I put my helmet on BACKWARDS..aahhh and the photographer was so nice to catch my fine moment..I was cursing "why is this thing not fastening and feels so not can laugh at me it is OK =) I was cruising along trying to feel my legs and catch my breath...keep pedaling...keep pedaling..butmy butt and crotch and legs were telling me I cause my OWN pain for not training more..after I reached 38 miles I was DONE.......I did have some conversation with some people out on the ride so that was fun...some girl said I deserve bonus points for wearing a swimsuit and being so tough...hum if she only knew how raw I was becoming!!! time 3:09The run..2:06this is when I knew (other than the swim ) suffering was coming...BUT I also knew few more hours and I AM DONE...and I will see the kids and have my photo =) I haven't done any brick training since last I knew my legs were going to feel like jello..I was going to try and run as long as my knee would allow.....well not long....but I wasn't expecting anything fast..when I was bringing it home there were my beautiful kids waiting for me with smiles and we grabbed hands and ran in that moment the pain was gone and I DID IT.....that is what I was waiting for...PRICELESS.... Loved it!!!!So there it was a HARD,,PAINFUL day of training....I did the challenge and that it up Duathlonsonly =) kidding but I really thought of that...seriously how are you suppose to have a fast race with a slow ass swim time like that...I waste so much energy just trying to stay a float to get the heck out of that water..try to swim that way sometime and see how you do =) I dare you!!! I sux...ha! DON"T follow my training plan.......Next up go to my Sports Doc next week and get this knee fixed =) I can't wait to RUN again!!![...]

Going for the Challenge.....


LOOK the suit was an irregular sizeI DIDN"T grow an extra ass...my11 year old can wear it...OH my what wouldI have done if I didn't TRY IT ONbefore the race..yikes =)Just a quick update....First thank you for the good luck wishes on face guys are the best:) Second thank you for the people who was giving some helpful info for my knee the moment I will just "deal" and then I go back to see the Doc after the race and will start the "fixing" process..and I think I am going to go see a Chiropractor to see if maybe I am out of whack...I have had problems in the past with my right hip being higher than my left so I am thinking maybe that is throwing my stride off....but will know more after the race...but thank you guys for showing your caring concerns =)A HUGE thank you to SPLISH...I got my race suit and let just say "OH MY" did I pack on another ass since last was like running in a I emailed them to see if I could go up a size and was wondering if the suit comes irregular sizes sometimes....they were quick to fixing my problem and sent me not just one suit but two..... one in the normal size I wear (28) and a larger size (30).....good thing they did because the smaller (my normal size) NO extra ass for me just a irregular size...whhheewww that was a scare=)SOOOOO I have decided to go with the 1/2 distance...most of you voted for me to do the shorter distance and my husband said I would NOT be happy with whatever choice I choose anyways...and he is probably right...I feel fit/trained for the sprint and think I would do well...BUT like people have said I have NOTHING to prove and I would have sooo much energy balled up after the sprint I would be mad at myself for not pushing myself for the longer I guess I want a little of pain:) I don't feel well trained and my friends laugh at me because I start training just weeks before a race...with my Whooping 4 bike rides since last 3 Open water swims EVER(all during a race)...and my runs are now half run /half speed walk that is what makes this push myself and just be out there for ME and my kids at the finish line...nothing else doesn't matter that my friend Susan is going to CRUSH my ass..she trains yearly ( no thank you on that..ha!!) actually I am rooting for this is her first year with a coach and I am excited to see her improvements...she will rock!!!I am NOT going into this race with any high expectations....I already have in my head this : the swim is going to SUCK regardless....if there is WIND on the bike I am screwed (wimp to wind)...With my knee the way it is I will be walking at least 9 or 10 miles of the run......and LAST wah wah..."who cares"..... the smile on my kids face is PRICELESS :+) I head up to MI. tomorrow evening...NO taking it easy for me...I am SOLO(Todd has to get the race set up) busy busy..... Madison has a Birthday party to go to.....I have 5 people to pack for....Skylar has a softball game...I need to get stuff to my in-laws they are bringing my 2 younger ones up to race the day of...and here is the kicker...Skylar is taking 5 I have to round them all up and take them with me:) and hope I can get them to go to bed early!!!! GOOD TIMES...lets ROLL!!! So here is to a good hard "training day" and GOOD LUCK to you if you are racing this weekend...HAVE FUN.....(I will be thinking of you Jill....I hope all that hard/crazy training your coach had you do makes it seem "easy" for you...even though you really do make me feel and look like a slack ass:) go and kick some butt!! Sorry it wasn't QUICK...I guess my nerves are coming...chatter box here:) have a wonderful weekend!!![...]

Screw this...Screw that..."Yeah what she said"


The new BLING (tendon band)I went on a little run today to test out my new "BLING" and I came across a boyfriend and girlfriend taking a smoke break behind their work place...(thanks for letting me inhale your poison..yuck) I believe they were in an she was loudly yelling "Screw this....Screw that"....YEAH that is MY motto for today:) After visiting my awesome Sports Doctor and discovering I have Chronic Patellar Tendonitis...WTH is that???....ya know how they go in their brainy Doctor terminology and as the good patient who acts "smart" and just gives them the ya nod but really has no f-in clue what they are talking about.....So when I got home I looked it up on the computer and here are some of the descriptions it gave me:1. Patellar tendonitis is an injury that affects the tendon connecting your kneecap (patella) to your shinbone.:2. Patellar tendonitis is a common overuse injury. It occurs when you place repeated stress on your patellar tendon. The stress results in tiny tears in the tendon, which your body attempts to repair. But as the tears in the tendon become more numerous, your body can't keep up, causing the inflammation in your tendon to worsen. 3. Because of the special nature of this kind of chronic patellar tendonitis the treatment is quite difficult to achieve. In fact, there are many instances when chronic patellar tendonitis treatmenthas required the patient to have to spend as many as over two years getting the condition treated.Surgery is often the only treatment option for those who suffer from chronic patellar tendonitis. SOOOO....Really what does this mean...seriously I think they just slap a name on an injury and really don't know how to cure it....other than saying which my Doctor did laughing at me...I said so how we going to fix this and he said "DON"T RUN...haha!!!! SO being the good girl patient I went for a 8 mile run and wore my little tendon strap and put my Votaren Gel on and honestly it did not do SHIT...reached mile 3 and PAIN....... I will keep trying this damn band and see if I have any improvement.....I did get that nice BLOOD BLISTER(photo above) on my toe...because I got caught in a down pour WALKING.....back to screw this and that:)I go back to the Doc....right after the race and we are going to discuss Platelet-Rich Plasma injections....he apparently did not want to discuss this with me just yet as it is not going to help me before the race and he doesn't want to scare me....and he said I will have to take time off training and it is quit painful....when I see the word Plasma...I KNOW THAT MEANS BLOOD...and that = OUCH......QUESTIONS: Why wouldn't BOTH knees hurt I use them equally.....and I am not hard core at training as most people I know...I DO NOT train year WHY aren't the people who are hard core runners and people who do Ironmans...why are they not all having this issue??? Huummmm!!!So help me with a decision....I am battling with ....SHOULD I do the half Ironman distance for a good "training day" and to challenge myself with the down fall of suffering and shitty times (which I am OK with) OR should I do the Sprint distance and try and kick ass...but have the feeling " BIG DEAL".....I WILL get the photo with my kids either way...but if you were me would you go for the challenge or go for the trophy????[...]

Racing plan???......WING It i guess!!


THIS is WHY I do it....Going for the PHOTO and SMILES:)This is WHAT I do instead of 4 hour bike rides....sit on fair benches with my sleepy baby, ready to barf my guts out from riding spiny rides with the kids(I think MY age kicked in..NOT FEELING SO WELL HERE:) Luckily Mason feel a sleep on mE.... my GOOD excuse of "why" I couldn't rideanymore rides:) plus It gave me the chance to devour a elephant ear..french fries..nachos...cotton candy..:)MMMMmmm..way better than a BIKE RIDE!!!!I laugh as my blog has turned into all KIDS things more than "what I am doing"....maybe because I really am NOT doing...I have been catching up on my friends blogs and they are getting psyched up for racing and all these kick ass training they are doing...I applaud all of you for your dedication and hard work:) I love following all of you and I love reading about your race reports and am amazed on how fast you all are!! I wish wish I could get the drive....and some days I feel awesome and WOW myself...To be I have gotten some emails from other busy Mom's... asking how much training do I "really" do before a race or other emails asking how my training going....well lets see...I am planning on doing a half Ironman (Racing for Recovery) on June 7th and to date I can count on 2 hands on how many workouts I have done :( NOT enough... lets break this down, shall we:??My bike was hung up since last early August....I took all winter off due to knee injury and horrible weather..just started training for the Half a few weeks ago and have managed I thought 4...but actually it was 3 bike rides with my 3rd one being 2 days ago and it went like this....planning on riding 40 miles..felt good first 20 miles... easy, comfortable and FUN...had side no effect...then coming back sucked ass...head winds the ending 20 miles and it took me at least an extra 25 min to get back..I wanted to call Todd to come and pick me up...seriously I am a wimp in wind..I can not focus and it takes my breath away..I was pulling at anything just to get me some turned into a karaoke..thank goodness I had my ipod with me.....I figured just sing LOUD and it will go quicker...I even raced a little wiener dog that thought he had a chance to catch me...and as slow as I was going he was looking pretty happy:) and I was happy it was only a small dog:) or I would have been dinner!!!My running started off good and I felt dedicated...but the knee has been acting up again and my Doctor is thinking it is a tear or loose cartilage so is sending me to see an Orthopedist and to get a MRI..I have been putting it off too long and am sick of not having a good run, I LOVE 10 mile runs and when I head out and feel good for the first 3 or 4 miles and find myself limp jogging/walking the last 6miles it is NOT fun and frustrating....The swim....not much there:) I do a master's swim class on Sundays and I feel like I have improved on my stroke since last year...BUT even though I feel OK in the pool and can hang on for an hour is a different story once I am in OPEN water....I panic!!! I had this little conversation with my swim coach it went like this : coach what if I swim in the pool with my eyes close?? Coach: annnnddd why would you do that?? I would not recommend will hit the wall.... Me: I was thinking since I panic in open water..maybe it was because I can't see the bottom and I freak and decide I would rather swim the whole swim with head above water...Coach: YOU swim the whole swim with head above??? That wastes a lot of energy and loose a lot of time!!!! Me: Yip ya think:) I am just trying to figure out why I can not put my face in the open water....and thinking hum if I practice of not seeing shit..and swim like I am blind..maybe that would be the trick!!! Coach: still giving me that "what" look .......and somewhere "Mr. Retired triathlete" in the next lane was being nosey and had to put his 2 cents in and it had nothing to do with wh[...]



This is what I mean...I can't always please them ALL..lookat the very too happy son..and one NOT so happy son...look at MOM still smiling:) ha ha...This is ME and my MOM...still love ya even tho you dressed me like I belong on "Little house on the Prairie" ......horrible:)My brother's Scott and did good Mom:) Just don't cut our hair EVER again:)One of my favorite people in the world..even tho she is my "Mother-in-law"..she is like a sister/bestfriend...I love her so much:)I would NOT trade this for the children/my lifeWe Mother's all know that it isn't always an easy is the second (after marriage) hardest thing in life...we want the BEST for our children and everyday we try and try to be the BEST Mom possible...I am learning as my children are getting older and there are 4, it is so hard to please them all!! I give and give myself and lose myself just so they will be happy! I am starting FINALLY learning it is Ok to say NO (they will still love me)...balance is the key..I am still not there yet..but getting closer...Somedays I want to throw the towel in and say I don't want to be a Mom gets so hard at times..but that thought last for a second....WHAT OR WHO would I be without THEM??? Other Mom's look at me and ask me "how I do it all" it is the same with ANY just DO...I have my UPS and DOWNS like anyone else out there:) I get inspired by other Mom's....I relate to other Mom's...I learn from other Mom's....but at the end of the day we are all the same no matter how many kids we have!!! To be honest I never imagined myself with 4 kids,,,and if I could turn back the clocks I wouldn't have had 4...BUT with that being said (and probably not right to say) the KIDS I do have now I wouldn't trade them for NOTHING!! I was blessed with amazing, smart, caring, generous, well mannered, athletic, mouthy:) energetic, happy, loving kids!! They make me who I am today..Their is NO BOND stronger than the bond from a Mother and a child....they are going to LOVE you no matter if you are grumpy or happy!! Thank you Todd and God for these awesome kids!!! It is funny as you grow up as a child, certain things your Mother did or said when you were little you said at the time "I will never turn into "My Mother" ...nothing against my Mom...but as a child you really don't think your OWN Mom is cool...Well I at times have TURNED INTO MY MOM:)....uuugggg I sound just like her!! But I turned out pretty damn good...Thank you Mom for being awesome..for being my teacher...being my hero....being my biggest me endless love...showing me the way to be the Mom I am today!!! Love you with all my heart!!Happy Mother's Day to all you beautiful soul Mother's out there...and remember when it gets tough...hang in there as "they" will become us someday:) scary but TRUE......Love and hug your children as they are molding us into who we are today "damn good MOM'S" [...]

36 versus 8.....I don't see the difference:)~


MY BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER:) This is me around Konor's age:)~ so YOUNG!! OK ya ya ya the 8yr old beats me:) he is GOOD!! I would say I am just as flexible or even more so than a 8 year old:)Today 8 years ago I was celebrating my Birthday by giving BIRTH to my second child Konor and barfing pizza and Birthday cake at the hospital (note do not try to eat minutes after giving birth....stomach can't handle more work that quickly:)....He was the BEST Birthday present God could give me!!So last night I was all snuggled in bed ready to dream about CAKE...well that was the KID in me..even tho the dream did not even come close to enjoying a piece of did give me WTF and a smile...I some how ended up on a cruise ship and at a line of a food buffet with this little chubby snot nose kid (I think it was the chubby snot nose kid from "Bad Santa" got me on him)anyways, he was wanting me to help him put some fish on his of course I did and I looked around for his parents..I all of a sudden turned from that kid wanting to dream about CAKE and turned into a MOTHER...I was worried that this kid might be allergic to I was in hunt for his parents to see if it was OK for him to eat the fish...and in the search of trying to find his parents I WOKE up and laid there wide awake and was thinking WTF was that all about:) ha!! I think I would have rather dreamt about giving birth than this twisted dream..but who know maybe it is a sign for something:)I remember around this time last year I received my first and only negative comment here on my blog and she stated that I acted more like a "child" than a "mother"...ya know what SHE IS RIGHT...but so what!! I DON"T need to just be a Mom who is saying "pick up your room"..."brush your teeth" " GO TO BED" SSHHHHHH...I do say these things a lot...but I look up the photo's above and I see more than just a Mom and son...I SEE a friendship....a little I would not trade it!! I think AGE is just a number!!Happy Birthday my little man Konor...I LOVE you so much!! Daddy and I are so lucky to have you as our son:) We are so Proud of you!!!We are celebrating our Birthday at the kids school carnival tonight....YIP I will always be a KID:) Have a wonderful weekend everyone!!!! [...]

Signed up...NOW give me some MOTIVATION!!!



I am signed up ...MEANING I can not back out.....Let the truth be told I kept battling if I was even going to race this year...going through personal was really the last thing on my mind..BUT after following the races this weekend...I WANT TO DO IT..I need a focus and something to motivate me..My bike has been hung up since July of 08(I know bad) and I swim here and there(again bad).... and run only when we have nice weather..which speaking of...IT SNOWED TODAY...WTH??? That is real motivating and wanting me to get out there and train..
Todd was on his way home today after doing the New Orleans Ironman and asked if I wanted to swim tomorrow with him...I said na and he laughed...........I know eventually I will have to put the work in...but I am feeling really lazy....I have a half Ironman June 7th I am thinking of I need to get the bike down and clean the cob webs off ;) I read blogs and FB messages and watch Todd train everyday and with all of you doing hours and hours of training and participating in tri camps...and think WOW I wish I was motivated and hard core like that.....but I am not...ha!! I can't follow a training schedule...I guess I like to only workout when I feel like it...maybe that's why I STINK ..!! SO there it is, I am signed up for 2 half Ironmans..1 Olympic tri and wanting to do a marathon...just not sure which one yet!! So second year of racing and hoping it will be a lot better than last year:) Put a fire under my butt and bring it on!!!!

Emotional weekend......Our baby is growing up!!!


KARLIE......SKYLAR...........RYLEE When we got home I said "GO wash that make up OFF"she looks way too grown up ;(This weekend hit me hard...My Skylar is growing up ;( she will be turning 11 next month and starting a new school (Junior high) next school year!!! It all dawned on me with the event she did this might be the "last" She was in her school talent show (this was her 3rd time) it was cute and gutsy...two of her Best friends. since 1st grade(.Karlie and Rylee), All three girls are sporty girls, but decided they were going to dance (which none of them take dance) so they had 2 weeks to put a little routine together and did awesome...while I was down on the floor under the stage taping their act...I was getting choked up....these three girls are like the three amigos..always together (all on my Basketball team) and this is their LAST talent show and Karlie will be going to a different junior high school :(....I don't think it has fully hit the girls yet, but I am sure the last day of school there will be a lot of tears flowing.....We had our LAST Basketball game(second session) on Saturday....we played... "really" the only other team that gives us any competition and the girls were on fire...did long passing and worked as a "team" ran the plays, just a solid game..won 25 -9....I even had the refs come up to me and tell me I am a "good" coach and did well with the team as they know what they are doing......I need to hear that kind of I have stated before I get intimidated as I am the only girl coach and the only team that does not have a assistant solo for me...but it all worked out....we won the championship team has been the CHAMPS for 2 years....I love these girls.....This is reality....I will have to FIGHT HARD to be the coach next year...with the girls going to Junior high school and other local schools combining.....the coaches I had to face this year will also be going for the position.....I will FIGHT hard, I am not going to give up on this team.....the 4 men coaches that will be also going for the coaching position are "locals" grew up here....meaning they are well known here...BUT I have the team record to back up my coaching and I think it is good to have a female coach at that we females know at that age ...girls will be liking the "boys" and PMS and of course the drama....something I am sure men do not like to deal with:)I am throwing a pizza party for the team tonight and will have to prepare them...just in case I don't get the coaching....emotional :( but I do have 3 more kids to coach....haHere is the Talent camera only tapes short did not get the end...make sure you have your volume cranked up:)enjoy 3 bff's having fun....Skylar is on the far right end!!!! allowFullScreen='true' webkitallowfullscreen='true' mozallowfullscreen='true' width='320' height='266' src='' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' FRAMEBORDER='0' />[...]

66 degrees today="It's getting HOT in here"...with a little giddy dance;)


(image) Me (after the 12m run) and Mason raising the roof to
BEAUTIFUL weather :)

FINALLY...we got a sunny, warm day!! Do you ever get those days when you feel so strong and you know nothing or noone will get in your way of having a good day>> Well, today was my day...SHORTS...SHORTSLEEVE SHIRT, SUNSHINE awwwweeee=perfect......I went for a 12 mile run and it went as planned...just go and do it with no worries on the mind and NOTHING to train for...just pure pleasure out there soaking up the sun;) I of course had goals I wanted to do.....I just prayed that my knee would hold up and let me enjoy this beautiful day....the goals were...NO WALKING and to stay in the 7ish min pace and it worked out as planned....I have to thank Nelly for his fun and sexy song "It's getting HOT in here"...I believe I listened to it 20 times and I kid you gave me the little "get your ass a movin, when I needed it" I am so ready for Karaoke;) Nelly has nothin on me..ha!!

I really just started to get back at the running a week ago..took most of winter off (hoping the knee would heal) and today it felt great!!! The days that when everything feels like it just clicks are awesome and to come home to little Mason waiting for you (with his Mario jammies still on) .. and a smile on his face is everything;)

Happy training or just enjoying the day!!!

"CHANCES" how many do we get or take????? How many meaning does such a powerful word mean????


This was my High school Graduation present from my Dad...I LOVED this was a shiny Red, sporty, fast, fun, Firebird.......I had to beg for "this" car....My family grew up on Honda Father was a manager at the Honda plant in Marysville he got free and discounted cars.....I wanted a RED sports car ;) Dad caved in (I should have stuck with the safe Honda;)The Day is still a blur to me..I was 19 and on my way home from college. It was a bright sunny day, dry roads....I was a mile away from my house and BAM..I can not remember what happened...I woke up with people around my car banging and pulling on the door....I could hear talking but it was like out of a Charlie Brown cartoon (wahwahwah) then I faded back to sleep.....the next thing I woke up in an ambulance and (my ex-boyfriends) brother looking down at me and asking me my name (which I thought was strange...he KNOWS my name) and continued doing the 50 questions on me...he was doing anything to keep me from going back to sleep...then I FREAKED...I went up to my face to scratch and BLOOD everywhere (I had a white button down shirt on, which did not help any, when you are bleeding) I thought for sure I had lost my whole face....I was strapped to a bed and losing it!! I bet the paramedics wished I stayed a sleep : ) Luckily, I just needed some stitches in my face and not any plastic surgery...I almost lost my had stitches in 2 fingers and some torn skin of my hips and shoulder from the seat belt...I really do believe God was with me that the age of 19, I NEVER wore my seat belt or sunglasses...BUT that day I had both on...which kept me from flying out of the car and the glasses kept the glass out of my eyes.....I found out in the hospital that I caused the crash and another guy was involved...I turned right in front of him while he was going 60mph...he was an older gentlemen doing his job driving a telephone utility truck....I was sobbing my eyes out knowing that I hurt someone else and all I wanted to do was go tell him how sorry I was Dad said no because of lawsuit reasons........WELL later that night I get a call from the older, sweet gentleman and asking if I was OK, so I got the "chance" to tell him how sorry I was, even tho I to this day don't really understand what happened....I either fell asleep or was in a deep thought!!! I still battle with flash backs from the wreck.....anyone who is in a car with me...knows I cringe at snow, ice, rain, stops....I am a annoying passenger ; ) The whole point of this post is I was GIVEN another "chance" but I question how many "chances" do we get...really we live day by day and that is scary to me!!! The word "chance" can mean so many different terms....You could be stuck in a horrible/non-healthy you take the "chance" of things getting better or do you take a "chance" of throwing it all away and starting new and maybe it would be wonderful or not???? When you are in a race and riding your bike "comfortably" you take the "chance" of not hitting your aimed time and being unhappy or do you take the "chance" of hammering out to reach your time, and HAPPY results!!!! Do you do smaller tri races, because you fear the swim on the longer course races, or do you take the "chance" and somehow make it through the swim,,,,,knowing once you are out of the water you are fine and DID it ; ) I have been thinking of all the "chances" I am given...I started back running since battling knee pain since October.......and while I am out there running...I think of my knee pain before it actually kicks in (I some times think I cause my own pain)...then I start thinking "why me" I need to be able to run...because that is when my "mind" is in a good place......Then the next day repeats itself...I think OK...I[...]

A family FUN day!!!



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Sometimes you just need to get out of the house and have some fun...I forgot how much fun College games can be ; ) ..The whole family went(except Madison...she went to a Birthday Party)....These players were very talented and TALL ; ) they make it look so effortlessly!!! BUT I have to say the best part of the game was the Psycho fans...You always get that ONE certain crazy, out of hand fan...that you warn your kids...YOU BETTER NEVER ACT LIKE THAT NUT ; ) ...but they sure are entertaining ; )ha ha!!! The kids were at awe with all the commotion...we sat in the student section (the college is on Spring break) or I am sure we would have really had some excitement!! Little outings like this can be so much fun and something your kids will remember ; )

Kids R so lucky.....Madison's(fourth) 6th Birthday party!!!




When it comes to kids Birthday parties....these days it seems like one is not get the whole "family" get the "Mom and Dad and siblings" party on the actual get the "school "party (that you have to supply the goodies) and then of course the "friend" party...So today was the "friend" party and I am ready for BED : ) My mind has been whacked lately I scheduled her party today while I was suppose to be coaching....did not even see that coming since we just played yesterday.....uuuugggg..I can't be at both places at one thank God for my wonderful Mother-in-law...she had to entertain the girls for half hour....until I could join the party!! Check out Madison's was super...her theme was Hanna Hanna joined the party and jumped into her cake : ) Happy Birthday my little Madison ; )

So today was victorious all around...we won our basketball game and the party was a success...I skipped master swim class : ( and now I am ready to go to bed...Is it OK to go to bed at 5 :30ish ??? : ) OH heating blanket here I COME!!!

We did it..we won the league and tournament title :)


IT'S ALL ABOUT BELIEVING IN SOMEONE AND TELLING THEM THEY CAN DO IT!!I don't know why I get so nervous before a feels like the old days of sickness to my stomach right before a big game.....the difference is I AM NOT EVEN PLAYING..I am doing the yelling...the coaching... I LOVE my team of girls...they are full of character...there is never a dull moment with these girls..they are CRAZY and perfect fit:) I am sure they are pretty comfortable with me as they all seem to tell me their girl secrets and we are always talking fashion...some times I step out of my coaching duties and turn into their at this age the girls are starting to get into the BOYS (except for my daughter I would beat her:)ha....I of course start the lecture of boys are trouble and they are too talented of girls to have their minds on stinky boys..they need to worry about school grades and the ability to perform in sports,,,,NOTHING else!! So I go on with my lecture and some, I think it sinks in and others they care less what I have to say...."They like the BOYS" Our practices are full of laughter..drama...and fights...cussing (from me) oh and dancing : ) my goal as a coach was first for the girls were to have fun..second was to build confidence within themselves....third was to work as a team and build off of each other.....I would say I am a hard coach as I don't like slackers..I want full effort...I stress that at every practice if you don't want to learn the plays or set the screen..then I don't want you out there playing...It takes ONE player to screw the team efforts of running a play...I don't believe in walking on the court...I LOVE fouls that means you are aggressive....I want every girl to be comfortable with taking the ball to the basket and taking the shot..I know when I was younger that is one thing of many my coach lacked and that was making me comfortable of taking control of the ball and have the confidence in taking a shot..I DID NOT believe in my abilities on offence..My rule is if you are close to the basket SHOOT THE passing it off, ....I would say 8 out of my 10 girls are confidence in their shooting and the other 2 are getting improvements for all!!We ended our season today...we WON the league championship with a record of 12-1 and then we won the tournament championship this weekend.....going into the tourneys this weekend we knew we already owned one trophy and we wanted the second one just as bad...but as any tournament goes (even if you are the better team) you never know the twist and turns....and with the refs not really being on my side turned into a back n fourth seemed like the ref's were gaining up on my team and made some horrible calls and if the league would have another title of "the loudest coach" I would for sure WIN....The ref called it our ball and the other coach from opposite team start to whine and said we the ref then changed his mind and gave it to the other team WTF...I went can't give us the ball and just because the other coach is crying change your mind...he told me to "Shut up" and gave the other team the ball.....seriously this is the crap I deal with as coaching...and some times I feel like it is because I am a GIRL coach (what do we know)...but you know what.... my team is awesome and held it together even with sucky calls...we knew what worked for us and that was the teams SPEED and TOUGHNESS and CONFIDENCE of taking the ball to the basket and shooting.....the girls totally earned both trophies and I am so proud of how they all became ONE!!! I am sooooo Proud of Skylar and I feel bad at times.... I get a little hard on her...but she is t[...]

This is WHY I am NOT canceling my blog!!!


I have been going back n fourth on continuing my I really have been struggling keeping up on can only write about "SHIT" so many times!! I am not that "happy" "go-lucky" type of girl at the moment that I usually like to the blog has suffered!!! I remember the first time I really started my blog and that was after reading Bree's she was SO honest and pored her heart out there..I even cried and could not believe how a complete stranger could have this effect on me....She was talking about when she first become a mother and how she struggled and not "really" wanting to be a Mom and how she did not feel the instant bond as first time mothers do...she put it all out there with her struggle......I could relate to what she was saying... as I was not so thrilled when I was pregnant with my third child...So from reading Bree's blog and able to relate with her... I felt an instant bond with her and she was my first commenter on my new blog:) Bree to this day is one of my favs:) I learn so much from her!!I have made some AWESOME friends just from blogland...some I have meet in person and others I have talked to through email or on phone/text...sometimes I feel like you know me better than I know myself!! To be honest, sometimes I think the blog is quite I have read some blogs where their life's seem so perfect without any drama or curve balls and honestly, I call that a "fake" blog and never go back to theirs....I don't believe in a "perfect" life....I like blogs that are honest and has struggles so I can relate/learn from and know that I am not alone.....Grantet...I know some things should be left me there are so many things I would love to write about just to get off my chest....but if it is going to damage someone else, I am not about that!! The purpose of this post is to say THANK YOU to certain bloggers (you know who you are) I truly love you guys:) and appreciate you!! This is an example on how awesome blogland can be and WHY I am not going to cancel my blog....I was having a "not so good day" and certain bloggers sense when I am down....and message me......I feel the need to share this with everyone (I hope you don't mind Chell) I talked to Chelley(who is amazing:) earlier on the phone and was trying really hard to be OK and be my funny self...but she sensed is her message:Mel, sometimes I just think a person needs to hear how great someone else thinks they are. Well, I think you are an amazing person and these are some of the reasons:1. You are an awesome Mom who sets such high standards for people like me to look up to!2. You would do anything for your children. They are very lucky to have you, a mom that has such devotion to each of them.3. You are ROCKIN beautiful! Hello, duh I will never look as good as you! ( No matter how much weight I lose!)4. You are an athlete that just has the natural ability. Others have to work much harder at it and you make it look effortless. Melissa Crandell, you deserve the best in life. I am so proud to be able to call you my friend!talk to you later,Chelley[...]

BYE..BYE..2008 HELLO...a FRESH 2009


(image) This photo was a "joke" to Todd, as I tell him I am
his worst nightmare...this is me in his dream:) Don't
I look crazy scary????

OK, OK I will Post "something" :) sorry I have been out of blog land!!! I guess I really haven't had much to talk about lately unless you want to hear ALL my grumbling and bitching (I didn't think so)!!!
I am SO GLAD 2008 is OVER..... I am on the prowl for a JOB to bring into the new year!!! I want to live somewhere other than HERE..I prefer somewhere warm...I am hoping for a lot of "NEW" changes for 2009...I can totally skip over 2008..I think that had to be my "WORST" year EVER...So I can only go forward and upward for the New Year!!!

Here is a quote I totally 'Love"....Mira thank you for sending it to me....

There comes a point in your life when you realize: Who matters, Who never did, Who won't anymore...And who always will.So, don't worry about people from your past, there's a reason why they didn't make it to your future.

Here's to a HAPPY NEW YEAR to you ALL...2009 Baby!!!

Santa welcome to my crib:)


Skylar saying "Mom let kids be kids" This is what Skylar's room looks like after "MOM"cleans it!!!! This is Madison's room after "MOM" cleansit!! This is the "after-school" snack mess..noticethe peanut butter smeared on the sink.... This pile of laundry is formed within 15minthis is the kids idea of picking up their clothes.... "lets throw it in the laundry pile:( " This is Konor trying to hurry up and clean his room before I get the evidence "onhow messy he really is:":) BUSTED!!! Madison did not care...she went to bed and told me "that Santa would forgive her" Dear Santa...I am writing you this to let you know what "REALLY" goes on in my house with 4 kids....yes I know they look very sweet and they really are good kids...but this Mom has had ENOUGH...I am tired of cleaning "THEIR" rooms and I am tired of doing loads of laundry...oh and when they come home from school and help themselves to a after-school is the BIGGEST mess ever...I mean seriously should a Mom really have to clean up everything or should I be getting my whip out:) I have been threatening these kids with "Santa" is watching and even had a bad and good chart going...NOTHING works....So Santa I took these pictures of my kids messes with them being surprised as you will see in some of the photo's..I told them I was going to post this for the WHOLE world to see what slobs they really are and hoping this will change their ways:) We are coming to see you again this weekend...can you please tell them to be easy on me and to help out more... I am a busy person...Basketball 3 times a week...Soccer once a two times a week...4Kids... a much needy husband....3 I do not have time for all this extra BS.......I know black mail is not nice..but I really just need some help....thank you Santa:)[...]

FINALLY Florida/Clearwater pics


First off I have to yell a big THAK YOU this was my FIRST Xmas gift this year...from my new BFF Chelley/ the Cancer survivor (Kate monster's super sister), who you will meet here in a minute.... I am a blanket freak, because I am always I saw this cool blanket (just like the one above) in Florida, but did not get it ....Chelley remembered how I loved that blanket and her kind heart sent me one...I LOVE it Chell, but I do have to fight Skylar for it..Thank you so much:) Oh and the kisses were soooo good too:) On to the Florida story, there was this Mom with 4 little angels who just needed a BREAK away from home...she just wanted to go and visit her own MOM (who she dearly missed), she has NEVER been on a trip with just herself and wanted the husband to experience the "solo" parent for once...and I will add he did a pretty damn good job:) I mean the kids can live on fruit shakes everyday right (ha just kidding) have to thank Grandma and Skylar for the cooking and Todd really did try to keep up on the house work after I had to correct him on what detergent to use for the laundry and not to mix the colors..but he did I expect him to know how to turn the vacuum and dishwasher no more acting clueless....PERFECT:) finally got the man tamed!! I had the BEST time with my Mom...we actually got to sit down and have adult conversation without kids jumping all over was lovely!!! We did a lot of shopping and a lot of eating and I even visited a shark and was curious on how sharp their teeth really were.....I had some funny looks from the pass a byers, but I started something as I walked away I turned and everyone was getting in the sharks mouth for a photo:) see I am not weird after all!!! I think I embarrassed my Mom a little..ha!! I should have charged people for my idea!!! Then comes the Clearwater/Cheatwater Championship race..I was going to meet up with this crazy bunch as you can see in the photo sporting all Racing for Recovery garb:) have Chelley(bff) Mark(North) Kate(Monster) Me(Mel) and John(coach)My Mom dropped me off at the Ironman shuttle bus....which meant I had to get my azz out of bed by 5:00a.m. I get to race site and seem to always work my way up to front row with my charming smile...(not really more like MOVE get out of my way(ha) ...I was right there where the racers get their wet suits stripped...interesting....they all looked like flopping fish on the ground..I have never seen anything like that I am waiting for KateMonster to come out of the water and I spotted her RIGHT away with her sexy skull suit on(I of course designed myself:) she was looking good I was yelling like a crazy fan...but she did not hear me:( so I finally text Chelley to meet up with her, Mark, Coach John....I really had no idea what she looked I had that dumbness look on my face...thank god she spotted me and was waving like a crazy woman:) So I jump in a car with strangers (except I did meet coach in KY) Mark even said "you are brave getting into a car with us crazies..I said I will fit right in because I am SURE I am crazier:) we had no clue what we were doing...with a couple of repeated circles in some neighborhoods..I think coach finally had it and parked the car so we hoped out and stopped traffic so we could get across the street to set up our little cheering section for KateMonster...Mark took off to find her and I think he ended up running like a full marathon or something crazy like that:) We stood and cheered for the cyclist and Kate comes flying by... but some how managed to high five me and chit chat..she [...]

I LOVE coaching Skylar's team


This picture has nothing to do with this post..but Mason had hisschool program and he was the cutest pumpkin ever:)Our 1st game photo:)YES....I finally got my computer back...Oh how I missed it:) So I wrote this basketball report days ago, but was waiting on computer so I can add the Mother/daughter photo we do every year for the first game!!! I KNOW I still need to do Florida trip write up and ALSO need to do a write up on Todd doing the Ultraman this weekend in Hawaii...MAN I have a lot to write about:) when I have my computer my mind is BLANK...then when I don't have it I have so MUCH to talk about:) Geezzee....AND I so need to do some blog reading catch sleep for me tonight!!!!THE BASKETBALL REPORT!!!!!I got the coaching position again, this will be my fourth year coaching with the first two years as assistant coach and the last two years as solo head coach...I always get intimidated as the last two seasons I have been the only female coach!! We were an undefeated team last year and I got all of my players and some new ones back this year so a total of 10 girls:) We are solid, it is funny as last year we only had one tall girl and this year we have 4 and two of them is around my height...(yikes) and these are fifth graders and then we have my daughter Skylar as one of the smallest on the team but a true scrapper:)I don't know WHY I get so nervous before a game... I get so strung out on coffee to try to calm down, but back fires and puts me in a daze:) I get the cold sweats too!!! We had our first pre-game tournaments last weekend and we played 4 local schools and CRUSHED every team...I had a middle school coach come up to me and said "if I was betting, I would place the $$ bet on your team" damn I WISH I could make some money at this (JK)The best part of coaching for me is to see the girls grow confidence within themselves...especially the new girls who have never played before...they are scared to even it is my job to make them BELIEVE in themselves and YES they can:)We had our first season game today and I will admit I am a loud mouth coach...I stomp my feet...I yell at the ref's.....I correct the girls and I bench lazy players...I want them to have fun and LOVE basketball, but I also want them to play smart and learn the skills that go along with it...We did WIN 20 to 9 today and the girls were estactic, I always like the first game as that is what sets us up for our season...the improvements are huge here on after, the BELIEVING...the comfort...the YES I can..the SELF-CONFIDENCE!!! I LOVE IT!!!!So here was my cheery post and I am sure there will be many more Basketball reports to come:)****Thank you for Everyones kind comments and concerned emails and text guys are the best and totally blow me away:)...I am going through some personal issues at the moment, but trying to work through them as best as I can...but not ready to post about it:( But thank you for your concerns:)Happy Thanksgiving Everyone...enjoy your families!![...]

Been quite long enough!!!!


Sorry, really wanted to stay away from all the drama bullshit...but when you have "worthless" people going to my friends blog to spy on me then I need to speak......Their are some "people" who are so wrapped up in my personal shit that it has become comical for me.....seriously don't you have something better to do with your time??? If you think by spying on me not ONLY on my blog but now going to others is going to win you on someones "A" are crazy, because at our home you are a "JOKE" we laugh at you!!! Apparently these "worthless" people report back to someone close to me and tells them if a GUY has commented on my blog, or if there is a photo of me on a cell phone that is NOT my phone.....then wants to proceed on calling me dumb, because I misspelled a word or wants to say how horrible I look!!!! The funny thing is I DON"T CARE WHAT YOU THINK OF ME...and that is the truth!!! I just had this conversation with a friend of mine who has a problem with caring "what other people think of them" "THESE" people are exactly that just "PEOPLE" they are not going to be there to brighten your day through rough times...."WHO NEEDS THEM" The ones that you are close to you will be there through thick and thin and will love you for who you are!!!

I am NOT perfect...I MAKE tons of mistakes and I know that...I am NOT better than the next person!!!

I hate to be mean....but enough is enough...Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself....SO "people/spies" if you are so wrapped up in my door welcomes you (you know where I live) I will tell you about ME and if you want to say bad things and bash me...go right ahead, BUT say it to my FACE...I welcome it!!!

Whew that feels good to get out of my system as this has been going on for awhile....but learning that "they" were going to my friends blogs crazy!!!

I promise next post will be cheery...:) ;) and I hope I don't lose any readers because of this BS...but rather see I am sticking up for myself against these "worthless-trouble makers"

I am Back!!!!! WELL SORT OF


I am so bummed...I had a BLAST in Florida...but can not post about it right now....because I need my photo's to go along with the post!!!! Without getting into too much details my computer has been smashed and is in the process of being for now I am using the kids computer and it is super SLOW and very frustrating.....I want to THANK the people who have wrote me emails just to check in on means more than you will ever know!!! I WILL get back to you:)

B R E A K.....



Happy Halloween :)



Another day down...WOW...I forgot how busy this day is for me.....4 freakin school parties...2 different parades...2 hair and makeup....luckily the boys are pretty easy...throw their masks on and they are all set.....Skylar EVERY year has to be some kind of spooky person that requires make-up..with blood and face stitches!!! Madison is always something curl hair throw some sparkles on her and she is set to go....BUT getting 4 kids ready on time....crazy!!!!

Todd and I usually take turns with one staying home and passing out and one going door to door with the kids....some how we ended up with 4 more the job was Todd's I stayed home and past out the goodies......I like checking out all the fun costumes.....but I can not believe some kids manners.....I sometimes just want to yell "YOUR WELCOME".....seriously how hard is it to say "THANK YOU". I had this one 'GROWN man" come up to me and I laugh and said "OH your trick n treating" he said ya for my little guy in the stroller....then proceeds to grab a huge hand full of candy WTF?? Your kid does not even have teeth and this greedy guy takes half my candy.....I got a lot of werido's this not know where they came from.....My neighbor does a haunted garage and I think the freaks come to our neighborhood just to go there...but some how end up at my house:(

The kids had a good time and now is going through their candy and trading each other:)

I am OFF to Florida Tuesday for a week....Mom needs a I will be beaching it and doing a little soul searching and spending some time with my Mom....I am sure I will be missing home as this is my first time away solo.......but I really think this is a much needed BREAK for me!!!

Hope everyone has a awesome weekend and good luck to the ones who will be racing at Ironman Florida and at Clearwater...I will be there cheering you guys on:)

Last race of the year!!!!


Skylar finishing fast :)Me and blogger friend jeff aka (Jahowie)Yesterday I ran the race that my husband has put on for the last 7 years! It is a race that draws awareness to drugs and live a healthy life style!!! I was aiming on doing the 10K and was feeling confident on my training times....Until over the last 2 weeks I have been having knee issues and could only run a couple of miles before the pain started...I did not want to make it worse so my training suffered....this is when I get angry....I was able to run 10miles comfortably three times a week and then when I went to Ca I came back and had nothing but pain...I do not know if it was all the high heel shoe wearing or by taking a week off with no type of exercise and then jumping back in full force that caused me to strain it...Who knows but it was frustrating..Welcome to the world of great one day and then the next be in pain and have NO clue where it came from....grrrrrr!!!! So I decided I would be better off to just do the 5K....3miles of leg dragging is better than 6miles of leg dragging :) These are FUN runs right??????The day was cold and winds where 30some super first thought was uggg not wind again!!! Skylar my 10 year old was also running the 5K so I drag her to the front of the race start (getting brave as I NEVER start at the front)....I see this girl stretching and doing her little jog warm up...I was like oooooohhhh this girl is SERIOUS she is out to crush:) So we are off I am up front with 16, 17, year old guys (I think there was even a 12 year old that was kicking my a$$....That serious girl took off like a rocket...I am tired and not really feeling zippy but like I told Skylar at the beginning of the race "the quicker you go the sooner you will be done" I get to mile one winded and out of breath looked at my watch and pace was 6:20 started off too fast (typical)...I thought to myself I am doomed....I can still see the SERIOUS girl up front and she is still going strong....I get to mile 2 and yip walking was in my mind and it sounded so mind won I found myself walking....I had to yell at myself a little to get going at this point I lost view of the "serious" girl........ I could feel my knee throbbing and I could not wait until I hit the finish and just be done....I ended up getting 2nd female overall (6:47 pace) and 1st in age group....16th out of not my best 5k result....but being injured and windy conditions I will claim it and overall was happy for my efforts:) The "serious" girl (23years old)did it in like 18 min..she totally deserved the win! Skylar did awesome...did no training and did it in 25:55 min and won her age group:) I was so proud of her....she is so funny her "goal" was to beat this boy (same age) she knew.....That she did....she crushed him:) I better watch out for her...her next goal will be to "BEAT MOM" and I am sure soon it will be happening:)Konor and Madison were little speedsters in the kids run...Madison really wanted to run the 5k...but only being 5..I thought she was still a little too young...but loved her (I CAN )approach!! I also got the chance to meet up with one of my blogger friends Jeff so it was nice to finally get to meet him:)This race was it is not just a race, it is a surrounding of people who have changed their life around or families that are grasping for HOPE [...]

The simple things in life that make us SMILE:)



The reason why I get out of bed everyday!

The reason I SMILE everyday!

The reason I can get over BAD days!