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Preview: Asshat Hollywood

Asshat Hollywood

A Shoots and Leaves Production

Updated: 2018-03-05T20:59:16.673-05:00


Kanye West doesn't care about white country singers


FUCKER(sung to the tune of "Stronger")Get lit, start shit, throw fit, just quitDouchebag, loser, bastard, fucker!Na-na-na-now they wanna kill me,Cause I acted like a fuckerI seriously need to grow up nowAnd stop acting like a soreass suckerPerhaps maybe I should have allowedTaylor to talk a bit longerMan, I’m regrettin’ it right now,Hope my career don’t sufferI need help right now,Where’s my publicist now?On the sauce tonight,Was pissed that Beyonce lost tonight.Jump up on the stage, I'm a douche alright,Cuz I don't give a crap about being politeHere comes, hey Taylor give me that award!Damn, look at me, I’m a real famewhoreI suck ass, I’m immature,Now nobody likes my rants anymoreHow in the presence of greatness'Can they boo at me? but neverthelessThis will be covered by all the pressThat I’m bullying the country princessLost my head, went nuts, threw a fit,It was worse than that time the guy from Oasis spitOr that dude from Rage climbed up that sh*tCan’t help it, phony, bein’ a dickPickin’ on chicks, later!Na-na-na-now I blame HennesseyCan that stuff be any stronger?I gotta go throw up nowCan’t sit here much longerI just don’t understand howEveryone thinks I’m wrongerThan that Lady Gaga blood shitBeyonce changed her numberI need meds right now,Call the doctor right now.I don't know if my date’s a man or not,Wonderin’ that a lot,Don’t really matter cause I think she’s hotOr maybe that should be I think he’s hotWe like to go to Rodeo on shopping spreesThen go home and check out the latest GleeBut if I had to choose, I’d choose me.Ain’t trippin', I'm caught up in my ego, a’ight?I mean, look at me I’m God-like,A mirror and KY for a good nightSinging with a vocoder on my micRanting on my blog, CAPS-LOCKED keys I strikeCalling people SQUIDBRAINS and the likeDressing like Steve Urkel on his prom nightAll these things makin me aDouchebag, loser, bastard, fucker!Na-na-na- it’s all over tvAbout how I’m a fuckerThe bitches on the View are saying“He’s got less manners than a trucker”I just had a little outburstThis won’t last much longerIt ain’t like I’m Chris BrownHe probably would’ve clocked herI need nap right now,I need nap right now.Seriously, what about that Lady Gaga?And Pink exposing her ta-ta?I think Russell Brand had a bonerBeyonce deserved that honor.Beyonce deserved that honor.Beyonce deserved that honor.Beyonce deserved that honor.Beyonce deserved that honor.[...]

The Most Awesome Thing You'll See All Day!



Sorry for the interruption


As a wise man named Eddie Vedder once said, I’m still alive. Hey yeah., Oh. Oh. I’m still alive.So who missed me?Mom?Dad?God? Are you there God, it’s me Shithead?Damn Well, if there is anyone out there, I do apologize for my extended leave of absence. But I have returned because this pathetic slut known as Asshat Hollywood needed a good, hard pity fuck really bad and wouldn’t stop sexting me.Sometimes you just get in a funk, you know?So I was trying to figure out just why I’ve had no urge to keep up with the going-ons of the attention whores of the world and the answer came to me in a vision of hair extensions attached to a hollow head standing next to a living, breathing douche the other night while watching “I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here.” See, it’s because lately, the only attention whores in the news aren’t even real stars. I know it’s been heading this way for a while, but now they are the large majority. “They” being these people that are really hard to give a real shit about one way or the other, let alone devote time and energy to make fun of. And most of the time, these dumbasses do enough stupid shit on their own that you don’t need to bother anyway. I mean, look at all the news in the past 48 hours surrounding Heidi and Spencer – “Did they really quit the show? Will they come back again? Are they really being replaced? By who? Heidi’s sister? Wait, Heidi’s SISTER? Who? Why?” Who gives a shit about these twats?And then of course we have the Jon and Kate saga every fucking second for the past few hundred months. It’s headline news. There’s something really wrong with that. Who the hell are these idiots? They actually had a special report on their marriage problems on E! a few weeks ago. Before all this foolishness, I remember seeing Kate once, (once!) on some show about multiple births and I only remember it because she had this big nasty stomach with saran wrap over it and it made me gag and change the channel and then I was really happy because Empire Records was on FUSE and I love that movie (“Stop calling me Warren!”) Now you can’t change the channel (or go online or to the grocery store) without seeing headlines about John and Kate and that thing on her head. Who gives a shit about these morons?! Is anyone even taking care of those children? She’s making Octomom look normal. And there’s another one. And so it goes and goes and goes.It’s so sad that nowadays anybody can become a celebrity. I miss the days when a person actually had to have talent and star quality and work their ass off or at least sleep their way to the top to become famous. Because lazy, talentless assholes like me respect people like that. But now, you don’t have to be or do any of those things anymore. All you have to do is:A) Go on a reality showB) Be related to someone famous, someone that was on a reality show, or someone really richC) Take fertility drugs and have a bunch of babies at onceD) Any combination of the aboveI guess that’s actually good news for us lazy, talentless assholes of the world because that means that we too can become famous. We all can! But that presents a problem. This conundrum is best explained in the cinematic classic, To Die For, when at the end after Nicole Kidman gets whacked (speaking of, her face never seemed to recover from being frozen in that lake) Lydia epilogues: “Suzanne used to say that you're not really anybody in America unless you're on TV... 'cause what's the point of doing anything worthwhile if there's nobody watching? So when people are watching, it makes you a better person. So if everybody was on TV all the time, everybody would be better people. But, if everybody was on TV all the time, there wouldn't be anybody left to watch, and that's where I get confused." We’re almost there, Lydia, we’re almost there.Anyway, I’m gonna stop rambling now and express my thoughts in song.(You know the drill, hit play and follow along below)Can someone please tell meWho these peo[...]



I went into last night's episode fully prepared to be let down, because "Rock Week with special guest Slash" sounds way too good for reality to live up to the idea of it. Surprisingly, it did. And then some. The awesome was even awesomer and the suck was the most awesome of all!I think we all know what I'm referring to, so let's just get right to it:This is the kind of we've been waiting for! And it couldn't have happened to a more deserving person! Oh Gokey, I'm actually glad you stuck around this long because if you hadn't we'd never have this amazing piece of Idol history! Another plus? We finally learned how to make Paula sit down when she does that annoying dancing along all the time. The funniest part about it all is that Danny thought he was great--he did a fucking victory lap at the end and cheered his own awesomeness. And then once the judges told him how terrible he was, he refused to believe it and said he'd "have to watch it back." Well, he'll have no problem finding it on Youtube:You know tonight Seacrest is going to ask him what he thought of it when he watched it back. He'll probably attempt some self-depreciating joke that will be so transparent that Scott MacIntyre will stand up in the audience and go "Dude, even I can see through that bullshit." and then he'll say he thought the rest of the song wasn't that bad. And then he will get voted off and he'll have to sing it AGAIN!!! (I'm dreaming on here, I know Kris is toast, but it would rule.)We have Slash to thank for this. He is totally responsible for this by psyching Gokey out about hitting that note. Slash knows how to use that reverse psychology for his amusement. Like when he used to tell Axl those blazer/bootyshort suits looked awesome and then he'd go laugh with Duff behind Axl's back.Nearly eclipsing the fall of Gokey was the incredible pairing of Adam and Allison. Try to watch this just once, you can't. Seriously, it's THAT awesome:The duet of Gokey and Kris- not so much. Just watch Kris, he's adorable.Allison killed:Adam killed:Kris got killed (by the judges):Tonight - Slash performs! No Doubt performs! DAUGHTRY (the fuck?) performs! Paula Abdul (hopefully accompanied by an animated cat) performs! The top 4 performs! Then Kris or possibly Allison (NOOO!!) will get eliminated at 10:07 PM. [...]

Ah-dam!! Ah-dam!!



So this past Wednesday, Idol producers tried to pull the old fakeout on us and make us think Adam was in the bottom 2 and risked going home. He wasn't. He didn't. Matt-in-the-Hat Girard did of course. And America was relieved. No one more so than little Baby Paisley:

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Don't forget to vote next week Paisley! It's been confirmed - next week is motherfucking Rock week with special guest mentor:

Hell to the yeah! I wonder if they'll let him smoke. They don't even let Simon smoke indoors!

It has also been revealed that next week the contestants will have two performances - one solo and one duet with another contestant.

Asshat Idol - Top 5- Rat Pack


Surprisingly, last night on American Idol, the Idols stayed true to the Rat Pack theme. Everyone got all dressed up (except Simon and Randy) in their best formal wear and pretended that Jamie Fox was some kind of a legend and didn't say those things about Miley and can I just stop here for a minute and say that there is a rumor that NEXT WEEK IS ROCK WEEK AND SLASH IS THE MENTOR???????!!!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!! It hasn't been confirmed but if it's true it means that the Idol Gods have finally answered my prayers. This is television Reese's Cups for me! Please be true!! Oh my god. Sorry, ok. Rat Pack. Standards. OH HELL, HERE'S ADAM BECAUSE THAT'S ALL ANYBODY REALLY WANTS TO SEE ANYWAY:Everything we've come to expect from Adam. Over-the-top, theatrical, crazy vocals, judges cream themselves (Kara, quite literally), etc, etc, etc.THIS YEAR'S SYESHA:Meaning hopefully she'll make top three (since it's clear Adam and Deadwife are 1 and 2 or 2 and 1, depending on whether dialidol is correct). Because anything less would suck. DREADED FIRST SPOT:Poor Kris. Despite gaining momentum these past few weeks, poor adorable Kris was stuck in the suicide spot this week. Even worse, he received good critiques from the judges, however later in the show the judges seemed to have developed amnesia and completely forgot that they liked him. I'm worried for him tonight. (sorry about the poor quality video)Ok, while searching for valid YouTubes for the remaining contestants, I stumbled upon this awesomeness, so I'm gonna be lazy and let Sir Bitter take over from here with this week's recap:[...]

BREAKING NEWS - Source of Swine Flu Detected and Sent Back to Mexico


Newlyweds Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are headed to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico on their honeymoon.

Have a great time you lovebirds!!!


Rat Pack Week on Idol


Tonight's theme on American Idol is "The Rat Pack" and for absolutely no reason the special guest mentor has been announced as Jamie Foxx.

I don't get it. Did he play Sammy Davis Jr. or something? Wait, hang on. No, no he didn't. Don Cheadle did though, was he busy? Cause that would have made more sense. Oh wait, Jamie Foxx is a
singer, that's right. He's a triple threat. Ugh. Jamie Foxx is one of those people that annoys the everloving hell out of me. Oh well, maybe he'll go off on another Miley tirade.

And am I the only person who can't NOT think of this everytime I see Jamie Foxx?

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Funhouse vs. Circus


Pink still don't wanna be a stupid girl. The singer is reportedly pissed with people accusing her of copying Britney Spears' circus theme, with her upcoming similarly-themed Funhouse world tour that will be hitting the states this summer, because her album (also named Funhouse) actually came out before Britney's.

Pink says,
"Had I known that certain other people were going to base their latest thing about circus things, I probably would have went into another direction. I was six months before that and didn't really understand that it was a trend that was happening. I'm pretty out of the loop."


Also "in the loop?" World's sweetheart, Susan Boyle, with her upcoming Carnival tour!


Thank you for being a friend


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This made me really sad. Bea Arthur passed away Saturday at the age of 86 from cancer.

RIP Bea.


Speidi to make it official on Saturday


Speaking of douchebags, the two talentless attention-whoring ones known as Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt will reportedly marry for real this time this Saturday. No word on whether Spencer's creepy-flesh-colored beard will be the best man.

According to, it will be a sunset ceremony taking place at the Westminster Presbyterian Church in Pasadena.

So anyone in Pasadena, please feel free to show up to congratulate the happy couple by throwing rice at them.

Bags of rice.

The big ones.


You could get them at Costco.


Who'th the douthe now Cristh?


(image) Criss Angel got sent to the corner for some quiet time by the producers of his Las Vegas show, "Believe," after he spotted Perez Hilton in the audience last Friday night.

Criss stopped his act and announced to the crowd,
"I have to recognith thomeone thpecial here in the houth. Pereth Hilton, pleath thand up. We have the world'sth biggeth douthebag athole in the houth!"

Perez then reciprocated with, "Thanks for the free tickets." He then twittered (God, I hate that stupid shit!) some mean comments about Criss's show.

The organizers of "Believe" and the Cirque du Soleil Moon Fry has since apologized for Angel's "inappropriate and disrespectful" comments and have released the following statement:
"Cirque du Soleil does not condone disrespectful behavior towards any audience member at any time. Cirque management will address such behavior privately with any of its artists to ensure it will not happen again. Along with our partner, MGM MIRAGE, Cirque du Soleil wishes to extend an apology to any audience member that may have been offended by Criss Angel's inappropriate and disrespectful remarks at Friday night's performance of Believe."

I'm sure that apology includes everyone sitting in the first row who got spit on.


The Latest Member of the "I'm a size 2" Club is..........


Kim Kardashian posted a message on her blog taking offense to the store Forever 21 referring to her as a "fuller-sized woman" while introducing their new line of plus-size clothing. Only, they never actually called her anything other than a "fan" of the store.Kim wrote:I am a huge fan of Forever 21 and I'm very happy they have expanded their line to include a plus-size range, but I am not in that size category and this article makes it sound like I am! I am a curvy girl and I love my curves, but curvy and plus-sized are two very different things. I work really hard to maintain my curves while staying slim and healthy, so to be classed as a "fuller-figured woman" of extra large proportions is a little offensive.For the record, I am a size 2, not 2XL. HAAAAAAAAA!! Can't. Stop. Laughing! Size 2! I love it! Even Kim's "fans" aren't buying that shit:April 21, 2009 7:19 AMblondedmbfan15 says: | ReplyI’m Sorry Kim but maybe you wore a size 2 when you were ten but any women knows that with an ass and thighs like yours you wear a much bigger size. Also maybe you need to take some college courses or high school for that matter; all the article said was that you were a fan of the store not the damn plus size line.April 21, 2009 5:51 AMtqgucci says: | ReplyI think you need to go to try on a size 2 in case you forgot what a size 2 is, you are NOT a size 2. Sorry but that's the truth.April 21, 2009 5:02 AMbadeiah11 says: | ReplyYOU ARE A SHALLOW BITCH*ONCE AGAIN YOU OFFEND YOUR FANS!!! BUT THIS TOPPED IT! ALL US CURVY WOMAN LOOKED UP TO YOU!!! AND NOW WE SEE YOUR TRUE COLORS!!**ITS REAL MESSED UP THAT YOU WON'T TAKE TIME OUT OF YOUR DAY TO ADDRESS THIS! We FANS DESERVE AN APOLOGYkareno8 says: | ReplyMy sister and I used to be fans, but no longer.You are NOT a size 2. I am 105 pounds and 5 feet and I AM A SIZE 2.You're not even a size 4 or a size 6. We saw your cellulite get blasted off on TV!April 21, 2009 2:18 AMkareno8 says: | Replywe are still laughing at how you say you are a size 2. Also, some plus sized women still work hard to stay slim and healthy. losing weight is a struggle for many because not all have the same metabolism, genes, or cosmetic surgeons (kim).April 20, 2009 9:03 PMshaydiva says: | ReplyONE OF UR THIGHS IS A SIZE 2April 20, 2009 9:33 PMbechiiik said to: shaydiva | ReplyNo but what you can do is put a rope around your neck, tie the rope to your roof, get on a chair and then let you fall from it :)April 20, 2009 11:33 PMshaydiva says: | ReplyI AM A SIZE 2XL AND I DNT HAVE HALF OF THE CELLULITE AND STRECH MARKS THAT U AT A SIZE 2 HAVE! LMAO!April 21, 2009 3:28 AMM. says: | ReplyKim, I know you're not 2 smart, but now I see that you just might be "Dumb and Dumber" built into 1! The US article states that you are a fan of Forever 21, not the plus size Faith line. You clearly lack reading comprehension skills!!!(The last 1 is my favorite.)I have the best idea for a game show. It can be called "So You Think You're a Size Two" where contestants like Kim, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jessica Simpson, and any other delusional moron who has ever referred to themselves as a size two have to attempt to put on actual size two clothing in front of a studio audience (and America). Tyra Banks would host of course and any(every)one who didn't fit in the clothes would have to yell "KISS MY FAT ASS!"In other useless bitches with the last name Kardashian news, Kim's two sisters just got their own reality show for some unknown reason.[...]

Happy 4/20!


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Asshat Idol - Top Seven - Movie Week


This week's theme on American Idol was "Songs From Movies That Other American Idol Contestants Have Already Done a Million Times." "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing": CHECK. "Everything I Do (I Do It For You)" CHECK. "Have You Ever Really, Really Ever Loved a Woman?": CHECK. Yawn.However fortunately, we have Adam:I mean, even Rob Halford was sitting at home like "Damn!" Then he added, "Shit, he's pretty hot too. Wonder if I'm too old for him."The only problem with Adam is where the hell is he going to go from here? I mean, is there more or did he blow his load with this? Guess we'll have to wait and see what next week's theme is ("Metal Night" please!!).Lil Rounds is about to cut a bitch:Lil' Rounds responded to the judges' previous criticism about choosing adult contemporary songs by singing "The Rose" by Bette Midler. She attempted to throw some gospel in the middle of it to make it her own, but the judges hated it anyway. Then Lil' finally cracked and delivered a verbal beatdown. Sadly, I couldn't find video of it (the one above cuts off before the judges' critique) but it went something like this:Simon: "Little, you are not as good as we thought you were. You sucked. Allison is the only girl in this competition that has a chance. Oh screw that too, everyone knows Adam is going to win. So you should just sing Mary J Blige songs until you're voted off because that's your box."Lil: "Ryan, may I say something?".....:That doesn't really matter though, because in Lil's favor, she has gained Megan's fans and according to DIALIDOL it's going to be Kris or Matt. (WTF, Gokey's in first place?! What the fuck is wrong with America?)[...]

Random Shit I Found on YouTube


Hey kids! You don't need to buy expensive trendy designer clothes by Calvin Klein, Gloria Vanderbilt, or Bill Blass to be a real hot dog, just check out Mr. T's tips on how to be stylin in this amazing 80's treasure.

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Donna's Back on 90210! Hijinks and Shenanigans ensue!


Here's a sneak peek at tonight's episode of 90210 with the return of Donna Martin, Fashion Designer Extraordinaire:

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So, Silver's normal again?

I say good for her!


Lindsay Lohan posted a fake eHarmony ad on

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Not buying it



Useless slut, Tila Tequila, claims a crazed stalker broke into her house yesterday while she was out at a friend's Easter barbeque, smashed her living room and locked her dog in the trunk of her car.

Tila Twittered (yes, she Twittered!):
"Someone did indeed break into my house. It's been a very scary night for me... Too much has happened. I am scared, exhausted and drained but I am ok! Want to apologize to my fans who were worried about me.
I'm moving into a different house very soon because I have a stalker who is very much so endangering my life at the moment... They broke everything in my living room....EVERYTHING IS SHATTERED! I'm so sad right now....this sucks. Then I found my dog locked in the trunk of my car!!!!!!!!!! I've been crying all night. This is fucked up. I'm sad and shocked... I'm still shaking and crying! My dog in the trunk of the car, house is shattered, everything is smashed! I'm staying at a friends house 2nite. Please pay attention to me!! Remember me? I'm a reality star! If I have a stalker, that means I am still relevant dammit. Like that girl on Dancing With the Stars, hey I could be on that show... ARE YOU LISTENING PRODUCERS? Hopefully this will make E! News. Oh shit, I just realized that I broke the glass from the inside."


The Duggars are planning to take over the world


Seriously, think about it: If each of their eighteen kids have eighteen kids of their own, that's 324 Duggars. Then their eighteen kids will have eighteen kids and so on and so on and before you know it, the Duggars will control Earth and we'll all be forced to join that crazy ass cult where everybody has really ugly clothes and bad hair and gets molested by Daddy Jim Bob!! I seem to remember Nostradamus mentioning this once.And it's starting with their oldest son, Joshua, 21. Joshua's new wife Anna is pregnant with the couple's first child. The couple told PEOPLE they are planning a "name theme" like Joshua's parents (all eighteen kids' names start with "J") which means, they are planning to have many, many more.SOURCEAll I can say is:Another wombPreparing for wreckageNow that Michelle’s out of her primeMore Duggar childrenA new generationThey’ll have two hundred kids combinedAnd I wonder are they all fucking deranged? And if under the bad hair, if they have any brainsWe don't need another DuggarWe don't need no more sperm to roamWhy couldn’t his wife use some contraceptive foam?Try looking for something….to do besides spawnThere’s stuff like knitting a sweater to wearIf music’s a passion, maybe try drummingIf not there’s reupholstering chairsThen I’ll ponder if you can be the ones who will change it?Cuz you don’t need a family the size of Ukraine Where all names start with “J”We don't need another DuggarMichelle’s already got 18 at homeAnd we sure as hell don’t need another reality showPlease, Joshua and your wife…Listen to my remarksIf you need yet another lifeGet something that barksLike a dog or something[...]

Trouble (again) in Paradise?


(image) "That Natalie Portman sure is cute."

There's a rumor going around that Angelina Jolie is rippin' over Natalie Portman personally requesting Brad Pitt to play her lover in a new movie.

A source said:
"Angelina had a massive fit and was shouting her head off. She accused Brad of flirting with Natalie. "Angelina can't help but feel threatened. Brad knows how jealous she gets but won't stop saying how gorgeous and intelligent Natalie is. He keeps saying she is 'cute as a button. Angelina worries about karma. It's eating her up and we're sure the cause of a lot of the rows is her not quite trusting Brad."
Ooohh, what goes around comes around!

There are also rumors that Brad had pleaded with Angie to attend couples' counselling in a desperate bid to save their relationship to which Angelina is said to have agreed to, but only after seeking the advice of her ex-husband Billy Bob Thornton. The source added:
"This just caused more friction with Brad because although he doesn't have a problem with her talking to her exes, he doesn't understand why she would take Billy Bob's advice to try therapy as when he suggested it to her she reacted very angrily."


Wait a minute, Angelina asked BILLY BOB THORTON for advice?

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When wrestlers make movies


Earlier today, I posted about the upcoming awesome tough-guy movie, The Expendables, and I mentioned that the cast should include more wrestlers in it. How funny that on the very same day, I came across this trailer for an upcoming (most likely straight-to-DVD) thriller called End Game (no, not that one, that's a whole nother thing) that made me maybe want to rethink my earlier statement.

End Game stars the amazing roided-out crazy bitch and Olympic gold-medalist, Kurt Angle, as a crazy psychopathic serial killer. Wait, it gets better! The film also stars Jenna Morasca of Survivor and Playboy fame (and now appearing along with Kurt on TNA aka: the poor man's WWE). She plays, wait for it, a stripper! This is actually a real movie. And not a porn (obviously, those have much better acting.). I especially love the clown getup (Doink!). Try to get through it without laughing (or chanting "YOU SUCK!")

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All I can say is, John Cena's gotta feel a whole lot better about 12 Rounds after checking out this trailer.

Guess who may be getting married.........again


(image) Stop me if you've heard this one - Pamela Anderson may be getting married again.

Rumors started after Pam's designer friend, Richie Rich (the hell?), told people at a party this week in Miami that he is working on designing her a wedding gown. Richie was quoted as saying "I already did one - we'll do another one" in response to a question about designing a wedding gown for Pam after she gushed about her boyfriend. He didn't mention if the dress would be white.

Pam is currently dating scuba diver (insert your own "going down under with an oxygen tank" joke here) Jamie Padgett.



Best Actress: Saaphyri


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On I Love Money this week, Becky "Buckwild" and Saaphyri "Lip Chap" tried to come up with a plan to make the 15 minute decision making time in the Vault run out so they would have a chance of being safe from elimination. The first plan, Buckwild pouring water over everyone (without even any soap or nuthin'!) failed, so then Saaphyri had to draw upon her exquisite acting chops (2:00) to carry out their strategy. She was amazing (and demure - 3:03), however maybe too convincing for her own good because when the medics arrived, they pulled out the needle and thus, the plan was yet foiled again.

VH1 really needs to give these two a show (screw that
Daisy of Love crap!), they're like the new Lucy and Ethel.

Possibly the most badass movie of all time


Fuck that Sex and the City crap, I'm looking forward to the testosteronefest, The Expendables, opening 2010.

Have you heard about this one yet? Written, directed, and starring Sylvester Stallone, it's the story of a team of mercenaries that go to South America on a mission to overthrow a dictator. You know the plot's not important though, because it's just an excuse to blow things up real good. Real, real good.

Check out this motherfucking cast: Jason Statham, Mickey Rourke, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, Eric Roberts, Stone Cold Steve Austin, and Randy Couture (UFC). As for estrogen, so far there's only Charisma Carpenter (Thumbs up! Longtime girl crush!) and Brittany Murphy (Good on her for finally getting some work!)

This has the potential to acheive the level of awesomeness that Snakes on a Plane could have if it was good (and if they didn't kill the chihuahua.) They just need to cast Samuel L. Jackson, Steven Seagal, Jackie Chan, The Rock, Vin Diesel, Bruce Willis, Mr. T, about half the WWE, and of course, Chuck Norris.

This will sweep the Oscars in 2011!