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halls of macadamia

Updated: 2018-03-23T04:12:04.690-04:00


Time to, uh... "bite the bullet"...


...and embrace full-blown high school nudity...
Students at the high school—where 19-year-old Nikolas Cruz allegedly killed 17 people last month—will now be required to wear clear backpacks, a step administrators hope will ward off the threat of firearms and illegal weapons on campus.
"Ward off"... you mean like garlic necklaces for vampires?

Call me a meanie, I just assumed...


...sending parcel bombs in the mail was implicitly "a bad thing"...
Chief Manley said Conditt did not mention terrorism or hate, but described the recording as an "outcry of a very challenged young man."
Well, then... the two dead and four maimed... I blame Donald Trump and the NRA.


RELATED: That horrible "rush to judgement"

So what's next on the forbidden list?


Drinking alcohol, fatty desserts... skydiving, motorcycles...
YouTube is entering the gun control debate with a new ban on videos which demo firearms or link to websites selling firearms or firearm accessories.

RELATED: I'm from the Trudeau-sphere...

...I'm here to save you...(image)
"The measures we announced today will help keep assault weapons and illegal handguns off our streets – making all of us safer.
Wait a minute... Canadian firearms outlets were selling illegal handguns?

Well, apparently, ONLY TO FOLKS who couldn't produce a federally mandated acquisition/possession license.

Good thing Pierre-lite closed that loophole.


LAST WORD: I heard that all you have to say is:
"Give me a gun,
Give me a gun,
Give me a gun."

And then spit.

And they have to give you a gun.

That's what my Liberal voting neighbour told me anyway.

Rest In Pieces...

2018-03-21T14:47:02.730-04:00 dumb millennial shit...(image)
"The suspect is deceased and has significant injuries from a blast that occurred from detonating a bomb inside his vehicle."

RELATED: A little background...
Four bombs had exploded in Austin since March 2, killing two men and injuring four people. A fifth bomb exploded early Tuesday at a FedEx sorting facility in Schertz, about 60 miles southwest of Austin. A package containing what was believed to be an unexploded bomb was found Tuesday at a FedEx distribution center.

A spokes-people for...


(image) ..."Diminutive Middle Aged Caucasian Life Coaches Matter" Minneapolis... was unavailable for comment...


RELATED: In other Minneapolis news...
"Black students have a 338 percent higher chance than white students to be suspended at Justice Page Middle School in Minneapolis, Minn., according to The New York Times."

A 21-year-old man from Brampton, Paviter Singh Bassi has been pronounced dead after police say he was severely beaten with “some sort of sticks” on Monday afternoon. Bahadur Bains, the victim’s uncle, said, “They stop his car, block his car and then kill him."
Sticks are what you use to support tomato plants... this poor f@cker got clubbed to death by a angry mob. Now try imagine the media outrage if this lynching had happened in, say... Cobourg, Ontario.


UPDATE: Be the KKK, be the KKK...

Karanvir Singh Bassi, a 22-year-old Brampton man was arrested Tuesday and charged with first-degree murder and police are still searching for other suspects in the brutal daylight attack.

The F in France...

2018-03-21T12:35:08.461-04:00 for flexible...(image) For Sale: French World War II military rifles... "only dropped once."

Come for the Spring Rolls...


..stay for the firefight...

Police believed the shooting was part of an ongoing tit-for-tat war between two downtown-based street gangs: Asian Assassinz and Chin Pac.
Which, apparently... local coppers are powerless to stop.
Included in the bloodshed between 2013 and 2015 were two brazen shootings at Yorkdale Mall — one fatal and one not — a non-fatal shooting at Michael's steakhouse downtown, and a fatal shooting on a busy stretch of Yonge St. in North York.

Thanh Ngo was believed to be a member of Chin Pac.

RELATED: Diversity is our... sweet baby jebus
She has been identified as Essozinam Assali, 27, of Toronto. The man found on the balcony was later identified as Onoseta Oribhabor, 30, of Edmonton.

Investigators say no suspect is outstanding. Assali’s death is being treated as Toronto’s tenth homicide of the year.

LAST WORD: More Liberal smoke & mirrors...
“Liberals cannot be trusted when it comes to firearms legislation because they fail to tackle criminals who use guns to commit violent crime; meanwhile, they treat law-abiding firearms owners as criminals,” Conservative House leader Candice Bergen and party public safety critic Pierre Paul-Hus said in a joint statement.

It could've been worse...


...think "sex robot"...(image)
"A self-driving Uber car hit and killed a woman in Arizona on Sunday night in what appears to be the first fatal accident involving an autonomous vehicle, according to reports."
Don't just phone it in...(image)

I blame the NRA


Remember, magic is all about misdirection. Some guy, somewhere, got shot... details at, well... never...

"A 31-year-old man has been taken to hospital with serious injuries after a shooting downtown on Charles Street, between Yonge and Balmutto streets at around 4:30 a.m."
Toronto Homicide Squad rounding up farmers, deer hunters and sport shooters as we speak.


RELATED: In other "Not a Racist" news...
A DC lawmaker, Council member Trayon White Sr., blamed a late-winter snowfall on the Rothschilds, a family of Jewish bankers — accusing them of controlling the climate and orchestrating natural disasters.

"Y’all better pay attention to this climate control, man, this climate manipulation," White can be heard saying in the video. "And that’s a model based off the Rothschilds controlling the climate to create natural disasters they can pay for to own the cities, man. Be careful."

LAST WORD: Always read the comments...
"This explains why, when I paint myself brown, I can fly."

Because it's 2018


Prime Minister Justin Trudeau’s “gender equity” budget is as shallow and ideologically-driven as he is, professor Jordan B. Peterson says. “It’s almost impossible to overstate how shallow that comment is and how not only shallow, but it’s also casually malevolent in an unconscious sense because he had a job to do which is to evaluate his MPs thoroughly and skeptically and pick the best people – period – but that isn’t what he did,” he said.

“Here we are, now we have a budget that’s equity focused. Good luck with that.”

BREAKING: It's not just Peterson...
"The popularity of Canadian Liberal Party Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is on a steady decline as his approval ratings have fallen below U.S. President Trump in polls as right-wing parties surge across the country."

Vancouver? Drugs?


Who would've thought...
VANCOUVER — "A Vancouver businessman & CEO, Vincent Ramos, who owns Phantom Secure, alleged to have sold encrypted BlackBerrys to international drug-trafficking organizations has been charged in the U.S."

Ambushed... backshot...


...that sounds so familiar...
"26-year-old Nnamdi Ogba, was shot to death on Friday night on a street in the Scarlettwood Court housing complex in Toronto's west end. Both suspects are described as black men with thin builds."

UPDATE: Come for the bowling...

...stay for the firefight...
"Toronto detective Rob Choe has identified the victims as Thanh Tien Ngo, 32 & Ruma Amar, 29. Police believe Ngo was targeted while Amar was an innocent bystander."
Ngo pronounced at the scene. Ms. Amar was taken to hospital in life-threatening condition, where she died.

nb. Don't confuse the dead guy with Ton Quoc Hoang Ngo. Different Toronto murder entirely.


RELATED: Racism, my ass!
"It isn't us, it's the media. The media has distorted our image to make us look bad ... Please ... When I go to the money machine at night, I'm not looking over my shoulder for the media. I'm looking for *******." -- from 'Rock This!' by Chris Rock

LAST WORD: Secrets... they can kill you...
Kareema would soon learn from police, she wrote in court documents, that her husband was "living a double-life and having numerous extra-marital affairs with men unbeknownst to me."
That Dr Phil is never around when you really, really need him.

And that's a death sentence...


...for you and you and you...
The managing director of the Institute for Research and Development on Inclusion and Society, which advocates for people with disabilities, calls the case “profoundly disturbing.”

“I think it reflects concerns that a number of ethicists and legal experts across the country have been expressing about the lack of safeguards in the system. This is the problem: medical assistance in dying is come to be seen as another health care intervention when that was never the vision for this.”
Of course, not everybody agrees... I mean, just ask a Justice Minister...
In a statement to CTV News, federal Justice Minister Jody Wilson-Raybould said the assisted dying legislation “protects our most vulnerable, while also providing for safe and consistent access to medical assistance in dying for Canadians across Canada.”

“We intend to defend the legislation, which is a fair and reasonable law that respects Charter rights.”

Your New York Times... Curing the World...

2018-03-16T15:42:58.031-04:00 life-changing issue at a time...

Oh, look... here's a story the Times apparently missed...
"City with Highest Per Capita Murder Rate Starts Defense Fund for Illegal Aliens"

A couple of years at...


..."Re-education Camp" and he'll be good as new...(image) I'm so old, I remember when we had free speech...
It is unwise to ask difficult questions, comrade.

RELATED: Hey, Toronto... wanna save kids lives?

(image) Bulldoze Flemingdon Park...
"A 15-year-old boy is in hospital after being shot multiple times in an underground parking garage on Rochefort Drive, near Don Mills Road and Eglinton Avenue, shortly after 11 p.m. Thursday."
Not to mention parts of the city's notorious "northwest" combat zone...
"Det. Sgt. Mike Carbone says the shooting took place on Saturday in a crowded townhouse complex in the city's northwest end. He alleges a man entered the complex, explored for several minutes, and shot 31-year-old Dwayne Vidal in the back as he walked from a parking lot to his home."
Maybe clean up "Steel City" while we're at it...
Two men wanted in connection to a shooting in Hamilton earlier this month have been arrested in Toronto.

Donovan Hines, 19, and Akua Page, 18, are facing several charges after they were tracked down by Toronto police.

The sad truth is... 33 years late...


...still beats Justin Trudeau to the punch...(image)
OTTAWA – NDP Leader Jagmeet Singh declared Thursday that he accepts the findings of the Canadian inquiry into the Air India bombing and condemns all that were behind the horror that killed more than 300 people off the coast of Scotland in 1985.
Wait a minute... is Jaggi just covering his meat?(image) Funny how Global News only got half the story.


RELATED: It's a legal system, not a justice system

Canada... where you can murder 300 people, perjure yourself to free your co-accused... and still not get a life sentence.

A very special invisible friend


During his hypothetical account of what happened that night, Simpson claims he and Charlie confronted Nicole and Goldman. After Goldman allegedly became aggressive, Charlie followed him into the house.

“At that time, I think Charlie had followed this guy in, to make sure there was no problem, and he brought in the knife,” Simpson said.

“I took the knife from Charlie, and to be honest, after that, I don’t remember, except I’m standing there and there’s all kinda stuff around. Blood and stuff.

RELATED: Bring back the noose

No wonder they can't ever...

2018-03-18T15:28:04.650-04:00 a war...
French authorities have fined a bread baker €3,000 ($3,700) for keeping his bakery open seven days a week, when the laws stipulate a mandatory day off.

Cédric Vaivre, who plies his trade as a baker in the small town of Lusigny-sur-Barse in north-central France, was found to have kept his bakery open every day during the summer of 2017 and now must pay a substantial penalty for having been overly industrious.
And... they should round them up and ship them to special camps...
The protests were led by Franck Viano, who organises cooking competitions and has set up a Facebook group called “Cuisine Niçoise Collective” to defend local specialities against “non-purist influences”.

RELATED: Speaking of laws...
The Justice Department under Barack Obama directed the FBI to drop more than 500,000 names of fugitives with outstanding arrest warrants from the National Instant Criminal Background Check System, acting FBI deputy director David Bowdich testified Wednesday.

Next up... scary escalator challenge


The further trials and tribulations of... Felonia Milhous von Pantsuit...(image) **********

"She's only there to re-build the temple of Doom. A few more blood sacrifices and she'll be back on top again."

RELATED: Remember, she's better than you
[Clinton’s remarks] articulate what is becoming the central myth of the liberal elite: We are beautiful and successful because we’re morally superior

LAST WORD: Stairs, bathtub... what's next?

OTOH, I'm sure Justin's gonna set up...


...a Burglars Insurance Fund...(image)
"A 20-year-old man has been cleared of murdering a trespasser in his home by stabbing him with half a garden shears. It was the first murder case defended under the Defence and the Dwelling Act, a law that gave latitude to homeowners protecting their property."
♫ "Gypsies, tramps and thieves..." ♫


Barrington Macpherson was the innocent victim of a drive by shooting in January 2017 and this past weekend, one of their neighbours was shot to death, just a few hundred metres from their back door of their home near Kipling and Finch Ave.

We’re not in a third world country. To be living like this, we’re at siege, we can’t go outside.”
You're wrong, Barrington... parts of Toronto are exactly that.(image) **********

LAST WORD: She thought they had come to her rescue.

Stephen William Hawking, 1942 - 2018


“I regard the brain as a computer which will stop working when its components fail. There is no heaven or afterlife for broken-down computers; that is a fairy story for people afraid of the dark.”

Ephemera no more


"Researchers at Yale are working to solve this problem by creating a kind of digital Rosetta Stone, a universal translator, through an emulation infrastructure that will live online."

Fighting fire with, uh...


...sweet baby jebus...(image)
"A long-time Toronto psychiatrist, Dr. Melvyn Iscove, who believes homosexuality is a “sexual disorder” that can be "overcome"... engaged in mutual masturbation and oral sex with two male patients on different occasions during therapy sessions, and once had anal intercourse with one of them in his office."
Overcome, huh? At least the Doc used plenty of snake oil.


"Maybe he got sucked into it."

A real timesaver...


...pull it out, dust it off... hit enter...(image) Call it "white privilege", but most of the guys I know wanna die of a surfeit of cognac, female company and fine cigars.
Police say 31-year-old Dwayne Anthony Vidal was shot in the area of Mount Olive Drive and Kipling Avenue shortly before 6 p.m. on Saturday.
FWIW, Toronto’s 11th murder of 2018.


RELATED: In other "cultural relativity" news...
Dannta Holmes, 39, killed Saturday in West Baltimore’s Penrose neighborhood was driving in a funeral procession when he was shot in his car, Baltimore police confirmed Monday. Baltimore police also identified on Monday two other men killed a day apart in the same neighborhood late last week.

The 342 homicides in 2017 marked a per-capita record in Baltimore.



♫ "Blinded by the light
Revved up like a deuce
Another runner...
in the night" ♫
“Don’t do this. Also, I want to be clear that a flamethrower is a super terrible idea. Definitely don’t buy one."

"Unless you like fun.
Or perhaps, you're a fan of the more classical iteration...
"a bag of insane flaming onslaught"...(image)
"Rest assured, there were only two reactions possible, and they were either A) excited gibberish, or B) stunned, open-mouthed silence."