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The Troll Report

Skewering our favorite right-wing dead-enders

Updated: 2018-03-16T08:09:00.964-07:00




Something for the babbling jackass troll to savor this election cycle. Pork out Jeb! You're the establishment's choice! Go for it Ben. You crave power. Kiss the pork ring and "inspire" SDA youth. Ted Cruz, a klownservatic's klownservatic, LOVES THAT PORK SAMMICH! We're not done with Ted. Wraps bacon on a gun barrel and EATS IT! Pork so "inspired" Carly's offshoring of

The Definitive "Crazed Databaze"


Just so you know what our favorite troll means by that: 142. Puddybud, Hey it's the new year... spews:  Here is the latest PuddyList of HA weasel libtard party hacks. If Puddy missed someone stand up and be counted. proud loony and his goat daddy love Piper is stupid Piper Sucks Ann Coulter’s vagina tadfuio;zxchjn’s vagina noble jon devore seattlemike artFart Carl Left Foot

The Puddybud Series: Back to the Salt Mines!


Over the course of the 8 years that Puddybud has polluted the HA comment threads, all of us liberal regulars have been bored to tears with his semi-regular bragging about his sex life.. It started almost from the beginning.. The comments range from the florid and bloated to the very intimate details but of course, like everything else he blathers about, it's always obnoxious. Like for example:

The Puddybud Series: The Only Question that Remains


So in the last post I revealed that Puddybud had "nothing bad to say about the SEIU" at least as of the time he wrote that - May 2007. Also, despite being the most prolific and obsessive troll in the HA comment threads by a country mile, he hasn't hurled the "union thug" epithet with quite as much force over the years of his trolling career as one might think. So I promised to reveal something

The Puddybud Series: On Unions


A part of the right wing tribal identity is a loathing of labor unions.. Constant harping on the ethical failings of union leadership and tactics as if the owners of capital and their body and soul bought tools in management never did anything underhanded or unethical. In the run-up to the disastrous outcome of the Wisconsin recall elections we saw from our local troll brigade a lot of the

Purple Haze: Marvin Stamn Pays Us a Visit


Marvin Stamn, execrable troll of old, one of only a handful that have ever been banned from the HA comment threads paid us a visit about 10 days back. Let's examine what he had to say: I love knowing I'm so deep in your head you still think and write about me. I always knew you had a thing for me. :) Isn't that just like a troll? So desirous of attention.. So caught up in their

On Steve Jobs


His philosophy of aesthetics reminds me of a quote that went something like this: “Fashion is what seems beautiful now but looks ugly later; art can be ugly at first but it becomes beautiful later.” Steve always aspired to make beautiful later. He was willing to be misunderstood.



The Montana "friendo" (right) and his leetle sidekick, you-know-who! The "friendo" from Montana hungers for the flesh of an occupier. The zombie cretin reaches for a "happy meal". Mmmm yum! Leftist! The asshat troll in his "natural" state. The asshat troll again, taking a "breather". The asshat troll (hat off) having a screwdriver at happy hour. Yikes! What a headache the next

The Puddybud Series: Puddybud is an Idiot


See this thread. The moron begins: I know you’ll neva do it but you could tell ekim where I’ve been in the world for the last three months since you know how to tell where everyone posts from on this blog. Me: Nope you silly dope I don’t know where “everyone” posts from unless “everyone” (meaning here right wing dopes) is REALLY REALLY STUPID and tells me!Puddydope: Second you were the one [

More Bullshit Code!


This code is actually from another project. I'll eventually use it in the troll project. It's kind of simple but it's just so damn awesome to me from a geek perspective: Click the picture above to see it better. What does it do? Answer: Anyone who has been around long enough to have suffered through writing a report in COBOL may remember the ancient concept of a "control break" - simply the

A View from the Head...


of tehchickenshit troll.. Quite a limited worldview to be sure..

More Bullshit Code!


In the last installment we looked at some code that implements the "added view column" (ac) feature of my column search program. I demoed it in the comment threads here. The column search (hacols) is the program whose output I often post in the comment threads. One day I needed a convenient way to assemble a url to a specific comment from parts I had already been collecting and thus the "added

The Puddybud Series: Where We Reveal Puddybud's Last Name


I once read in a detective novel that solving mysteries is simply a matter of learning, over and over again with each mystery, to see what is right in front of one's face. In this post, the mystery I am reporting to have solved, is the last name of Puddybud. We know his true first name - Darrell. We've known it for a long time. He signed one of his early comments with it: 149. Puddybud spews:

Bullshit Code!


During the back and forth in the comment threads over the tragic shooting of Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords (among others), Puddybud went off on yours truly: You wasted all those unemployed months telling the unemployment office you were looking for a yob while writing BULLSHIT code!Bullshit code??? Hey those are fighting words! Can Puddybud or anyone else tell "the world" what this does?

The Puddybud Series: The Definition of "WAY BEFORE"


Again: Puddy was the recipient of name calling WAY BEFORE Puddy called people names. Ok forget that Puddybud, in his very first comment, called Goldy a "butt" (which he has flat out denied) and a "HorsesAss", which we'll set aside - after all, Tim Eyman got that from Goldy, right? It's only right Goldy should expect that from Eyman supporters, right? What about this "WAY BEFORE" stuff? What

The Puddybud Series: Monomaniacal!


monomania/mɒnəˈmeɪniə/ ▶noun obsessive preoccupation with one thing. – derivatives monomaniac noun & adjective, monomaniacal adjective. The world "monomoniacal" appears, as of the end of November 2010, in 238 comments. Let's see who's used the word over the years: Puddybud shows up quite prominently. In fact his various handles account for 222 out of the 238 usages. Since this series is about

The Puddybud Series: Who Started the Name-Calling?


Short answer: Puddybud did. Proof: First, a quote from old #2 himself: Puddy was the recipient of name calling WAY BEFORE Puddy called people names.Yes he's said this many times. We liberal leaning folk started name-calling him. He was provoked into being such an OCD name-calling troll. Sorry Puddybud. This is not true. Let's look at your very first comment at (as Puddybud, anyway),

Get a Job!


DB Snapshot Demo


Enjoy.. Blow it up to full screen to see it better. Update: small bug found in the snapshot code. As of my last run, the db has 238 comment records over 8 articles in August. Before it was just importing the same 168 records.

The Junkshot Series: Let's talk about Reckless


This post will begin a series on HA's most obsessive and unrepentant troll: junkshot, my name for the troll you all know as Puddybud. We'll start at the margins and move in deeper. This will be an occasional series touching on stuff I find mostly laugh out loud hilarious, otherwise I'm sure you'll all agree that junkshot is a pretty tedious character. Focusing on individual trolls is somewhat of

Yet More Tagging Progress!


The 319 handles in the "between 100 and 999 comments" bracket have been tagged. Learned many interesting things. About a third of the handles were pretty obvious names that were familiar to me. They took about as much time to tag as the over 1000 group. However the remainder were kind of forgotten to me and I had to flip between my tag file and a little query script to scan their comments to

Tagging Progress


Over the weekend I took the most comment-prolific 81 handles, grouped the contained aliases under a single tag (e.g. all of Puddybud's various handles under the tag "junkshot") and categorized the tag as troll or non-troll. Remember that those top 81 handles have contributed 1,000 or more comments each and in total account for over 62 percent of all comments. Conclusion: 30 percent of those

One for the Ages


“If your faith conflicts with reality, ignore reality.” A distilled teabagger and HA troll maxim. This blog cannot be about just the trolls. It should also from time to time salute the heroes. Thanks to relative newcomer, Deathfrogg.



Been a while since the last post. Still tagging handles, still removing warts from my code. The latest code is almost where I want it. I could do a bit more factoring, removing some repetition but it would be more for aesthetic purposes. The code does what I want with satisfactory performance. Test coverage as is usually the case could be much better. On a more relevant note, April and May 2010

Entering the Twitterverse


Tagging handles in earnest indeed. In the meantime, I may tweet a few eureka moments about code or trolls. While I was at it, I added an rss feed. Ciao..