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Preview: The Ministry of Offence

The Ministry of Offence

Department of preventive strike and disproportional retaliation

Updated: 2017-09-05T20:30:08.535-07:00


Benazir Bhutto: Osama Bin Laden is dead


Listen carefully to the video below. At some point (around min. 2:14) Benazir Bhutto says "Omar Sheikh, the man who murdered Osama Bin Laden". What's amazing is the reporter who took the interview did not ask her anything about the remark. Not "What did you just say?" not "When?" not "Sure you meant Daniel Pearl?" (Omar Sheikh is known to be responsible for that). Moreover, no major news agency spoke about this up until now, and no politician or intelligence service representative have confirmed or denied the claim.

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Another thing to note is that she lists the people who in her opinion will try to assassinate her, and there is *no* mention of Osama Bin Laden. Instead, she mentions his son, Hamza Bin Laden. In light of this, I think she did not misspoke, and in fact meant what she said.



"What do trees have to talk about, hmm... except the consistency of squirrel droppings?" (Gimli)

I notice that both right and left candidates in the US presidential race are making supreme effort to convince us that their views did not change over time, while accusing each other of changing views. If a candidate is found to contradict himself in another interview the fact is immediately on TV, and the candidate is convincing us that he/she actually meant something else - something he/she is saying now.

But wait a second. Since when never changing your opinion is a good thing? Person that never changes his opinion never learns. He is never inconvenienced by reality, his views are frozen in time and space, forever undisturbed by the entropy of expanding universe. He must be a God, or a cartoon character, or an idiot. And whatever is the case, and whoever wins, he is also the next president of the United States.

Are they back?



This photo was recently taken by a journalist during violent suppression of demonstration against Putin's regime in St. Petersburg organized by "Other Russia" organization. The photo was published by the Esquire magazine. So, what does Russian authorities intend to do about this?

They are concerned. They want to find out how it could happen that SS soldiers are suppressing freedom of speech and demonstration in Russia, more then half a century after being defeated in WWII. No, strike that last one. They want to find out how it could happen that the Esquire magazine publishes "obviously fake photographs", and if it could be punished for publishing Nazi symbol, which is prohibited by law!

Good thing there is that law.

Expert from Peres' answers to Winograd commission


Expert from answers of Peres to Winograd commission. Can't vouch for accuracy as this is translation from Russian, but if I have time and access I will bring more translations directly from Hebrew. Peres comes out here as a slime and a demagogue. Let me also remind you that when he heard that the protocols will be published he mentioned he wouldn't give the same answers if he knew. Read and "enjoy".

I wouldn't start a war

Gabizon: Did you say anything to Olmert? You are a high ranking minister.

Peres: I said that there are different alternatives

Gabizon: I do not understand why you voted in favor

Peres: And if I were to abstain? There was a majority anyway

Gabizon: If you thought the war was a mistake, why didn't you left the government?

Peres: And loose all the influence?

Gabizon: And how did you influenced?

Peres: I conducted discussions

Einan: With whom? Sharon Stone? And why didn't you turned to press and said...

Peres: What? That I oppose? And damage the moral of our soldiers?

Gabizon: And why didn't you explained your position and left the government after the war?

Peres: Threats of Hizballah require a response. I had no choice.

Einan: You are contradicting yourself, and not answering the question again.

Peres: There is no contradiction. I wouldn't start a war.

Gabizon: But you voted in favor?

Dror: Maybe Mr. thinks he is from UN?

Peres: My friend, I voted because of... circumstances.

Gabizon: Voted in favor of war while being against it?

Peres: I had no other choice

Gabizon: Who didn't had a choice, you personally, or the State?

Peres: I don't deal with personal business. I meant the State.

Gabizon: Did anybody forced you to vote in favor? Could you abstain?

Peres: My dear, nobody promised me anything

Nadel: She didn't ask if anybody promised you anything

Peres: Oh, and I thought...

Gabizon: And despite your position, you voted in favor and supported the government all this time.



Which Programming Language are You?

Please, stay


The people that call for Olmert's and Peretz's resignation are completely missing the point. Its not them who should be let go, it is their parties Avoda and Kadima. They are all responsible for the outcome of Second Lebanon War. That also includes Gil and Shas. Right now all the ex-friends of Olmert's and Peretz's are trying to shift all the blame just on those two. If people don't recognize this, new tricksters will arise from the same parties, and we will be back to square one. Olmert needs to stay as long as is needed for the coalition to rip itself apart from inside for the fear of association with him. Please, stay!

The Music Cipher of Rosslyn Chappel... Unlocked?


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Guess which country this is


Prime Minister: "I am not going to resign. I am going to appoint commission that will implement conclusions of the other commission. That I appointed. To investigate me. No, I don't mean the State Controller, him I would fire if I could." (Polls: support: 15%, oppose: 69%)

Minister of Defense: "I didn't realize minister of defense has to understand something about the military. I wish I was minister of finance. Although he is now under criminal investigation..." (Polls: support: 12%, oppose: 74%)

Minister of External Affairs: "I didn't know we are going to war. I am not going to support Prime Minister though. I want his chair." (Polls: who cares?)



This letter, from October 19, 2006, was sent by the Israeli Ministry of Justice to Russian bureau of Interpol. The content is simply astonishing.

About Gaydamak's accusations against some Israeli officials:
Wishing to avoid criminal responsibility, Gaydamak spreads in the mass media false information about the high-ranking officials of the country (including the State Attorney), insults them, accuses of committing offences, and making substantial damage to the interests of Israel and its nationals.

By making such allegations Gaydamak seeks to destabilize political situation in the country, makes threats to "to lead people" to fight those who breach the interests of people and do not protect the nationals.
And what "situation" is that exactly? Is it the one in which leading the people and protecting their interests is illegal, and serves grounds for arrest and criminal prosecution?
Now Gaydamak has invited Mr. Zvi Magen, the former ambassador of Israel to Moscow, to take a position of political adviser.

According to information available Gaydamak alleges that Magen has friendly relationship with the Russian President, has wide connections in the Russian political and business elite which he (Gaydamak) intends to use in the further fight for political leadership in Israel.
Or more specifically, is this the "situation" in which fighting for political leadership is considered illegal? Is this Israel of 2006 we are talking about? Apparently yes. But there is more.
This information may be confirmed by Gaydamak's statements which sound as an appeal to overthrow the acting Israeli government.
With the help of the cunning team of Zvi Magen and the Russian President I presume, the Beitar Football team, and the dirty political exercises such as "hiring an adviser" and "leading the people".

Mr. Blum, who authored the letter, can rest assured, that Russian Federation, and specifically Russian President Putin have lots of experience in handing such "situations". Just ask Khodorkovsky.

Two steps forward


Surprisingly, I am now a Slithering Reptile in the TTLB ecosystem. Not sure what I did to deserve it, but my visitors skyrocketed recently (on my humble scale). In another surprising development, IsraellyCool now links to this blog. Thanks Dave!

The True Hero


It would appear that AP Photographer Oded Balilty won a prestigious Pulitzer prize for a photograph (above) taken during the infamous dismantling of Amona. While he should definitely be commended for making and publishing this photograph, I can't help but feel that the real hero of this story is not the photographer, but the brave woman on the photograph, on her own holding a fence against an entire division of armed to the teeth policemen.
Of course, she and many others like her won't be getting a prise. In fact, they wont be getting even the minimum, promised compensation for lost homes. But the photograph, the photograph will be cherished.
Once again Europeans prove that they prefer to see Jews doing something bad, or something bad being done to them. I can easily see how this photograph embodies both.

Virginia's Ax


Everybody heard by now about the tragedy in Virginia Tech. What some might not know is the fact that the murderer mentioned he was disappointed in his religion, which was Christianity. It gets more interesting. On his hand he wrote words Ismail Ax. Recall that Ismail, or Ishmael, was the other son of Abraham (born of a maid), the progenitor of Arabs. And so the prophesy in the scripts says this about him:
He will be a wild donkey of a man; his hand will be against everyone and every one's hand against him, and he will live in hostility toward all his brothers. (NIV, Genesis 16)
Note the bold. Do we have a convert to Islam ladies and gentlemen, swinging the Ax of Ishmael? If only Abraham could keep his pants zipped, none of this would have happened.

How Higgs Found Bisons


Times Online:
"The hope is that such collisions will generate exotic new particles — especially the so-called Higgs boson which, theorists predict, could help explain key properties of matter, such as how it acquires mass and, hence, weight."

Reader 1:
"Silly to get your multiple knickers in a twist over a simple typo - it's so obviously a BISON."
Sue, Pontypridd, Wales

Reader 2:
"Isn't a Boson a big hairy American cow? Or is that a Bison. "
Andy , Ellesmere Port,

How to save Israeli kidnapped soldiers


As you probably know, Iran has succumbed, and is ready to return the 15 kidnapped British soldiers. Of course, had Iran had it's way, it would have kept humiliating and torturing British public for years, promising small pieces of information about the well being of the soldiers in exchange for political concessions and release of thousands of terrorists from prisons in Britain and US. That is, just the way it works with Israel. The way it "ought" to be. Yet, USA freed exactly 1 Iranian prisoner to get all 15 soldiers back alive. What's going on here?

What is going on is that Iran got military threatened. "But wait a minute", you might say, "Israel not only threatened Hezballah, Israel started a war against it!". True. And pointless. As Bibi Netaniahu once correctly pointed out, there is no such thing as Hezbollah. There is arm of Iranian army that calls itself by this name. The only way to force their hand is to threaten Iran. Threatening Hezballah is as ridiculous as Britain threatening some "Iranian coast guard" would sound like.

Israel needs to go after the villain, not it's arm. And the guys will be back home. Together with Ron Arad. If he is still alive.

One step closer


Ministry of Offense hereby wants to extend it's congratulations to the new member of the cabinet, the Minister of Information, Rumors and Hearsay. The only thing now standing between us and total world domination is noticeable absence of Minister of Occupation. People, somebody needs to handle the executions! Any volunteers?

This is the right time


Last summer, after Hezbolah kidnapped 3 Israeli soldiers Israel went to war. Sure it didn't end that well, but that was the right thing to do at the time. Now we got Iran kidnapping 15 British soldiers. Just like Hezbolah they are too arrogant to expect a military response. This is the time to strike back. Can it end badly? Sure. But that depends on execution. I am sure nobody in the US/British command is as incompetent as Olmert+Peretz couple. This is the time to dismantle their nuclear plants.

Iraq. Day ***9


Fighting the good fight.




In this documentary photo Hamas terrorists show of their superior camouflage skills. Notice anything strange?

Why is he wearing green uniform, magically covered with leaves, in the middle of light-brown desert? And what's with the fake beard? Maybe it is for making us believe he is just an intimidating local phalah, crawling through the desert with his shotgun, in search for a job?

Thousand nations of muslim empire descend upon you


Two developments not really mentioned in the mainstream press that should make you nervously giggle:

1. The Iran has taken over the smuggling over the Suez channel, and not even Egyptians (according to their own admission and facts) have the resources to deal with that development

2. The King of Jordan Abdullah, and his father before him, supported and keep supporting Hamas. Such is the conclusion of a two year long intelligence gathering process undertaken in Israel.

This man is innocent. He killed no one this morning!


Recently Internet journal Linux-Watch accused a research group Yankee Group of biased comparisons between Windows and Linux that favor the former. Yankee Group responded. Here is a condensed, self-sufficient version of their hilarious exchange in pleasantries:

LW: Yankee Group lies!
YG: This is absolutely and utterly untrue. Sometimes we tell the truth!

LW: Yankee Group is polling a self selected group of people.
YG: Not true! We do this only sometimes! Also, we use other sources, which... we will neglect to mention here.

LW: And the group is also biased!
YG: False! They say nice things too.

LW: Yankee Group collaborated with a Microsoft subsidiary Sunbelt to create the report!
YG: Which subsidiaries? Where? We see nothin'.

LW: We caught Yankee Group lying before.
YG: We weren't hiding it... that well.

LW: So, why promote biased surveys? Maybe Microsoft's products can't win in honest ones?
YG: We are a very honest company.

From Sudan... on Boing 747


Remember the Sudanese "olim" I talked about in my previous post? Turns out they also arrive through Ben Gurion airport. The money for the high-tech travel comes from United Nations. Hey, maybe after we finish building the Palestinian state we can grant sovereignty to freedom loving people of Sudan. Somewhere in Ramat Gan.

Secret War


Did you know that Iraq is the only country were more journalists die in a year then in Russia? Did you know that French Constitutional Council just passed a law prohibiting anyone without journalist accreditation filming or broadcasting violence, in essence criminalizing citizen's journalism? See any common trends?

Slightly shortsighted ?



Amir Peretz in a photo from today and George W. Bush in an old photo. They say Ariel Sharon did the same thing once.

From Sudan with Love


Apparently, even while sitting in Israeli prison one can discover (even more) corruption of the current Israeli government. "What's that" you say?

Shmuel Zatam, a recent immigrant from USA, is sitting in Israeli prison on charges of "intention to kill Arabs". Not only did he bring the family hunting rifle on his way to Israel from North Carolina last March, but what's more, answering an inquiry of authorities on his future place of living he said that he intends to live in the Kfar Tapuah, the ideological center of Kach movement. Too bad he didn't know that in Israel those two facts, when put together, are considered "an attempted murder" and are sufficient for imprisonment until trial.

After spending the past 9 months in Ashkelon prison Shikma, awaiting his trial, Shmuel uncovered the following fascinating scheme. Turns out there are Sudanese prisoners sitting in Shikma prison. They are not prisoners of war that never happened. They are sitting there by agreement with Israeli government. Sudanese cross the Egyptian border where they allow themselves to be captured by the border patrol. They are shipped to Shikma where they spend the next 3 months, working. By the end of this time period they are given money they made over the 3 months, an Israeli citizenship, and are set free inside Israel to seek further employment.

Why is this being done? Because they are dirt-cheap labor, and the government can't let Palestinians in because they keep blowing themselves up in the cities, and Jews want decent pay. But why is Israeli government breaking the law and destroying the future of the state, by filling it with yet more Muslims? Because they can save a buck or two!

Back to you,
Reporting from the land of twisted mirrors, where the unjustly imprisoned are fighting to save the country from the lawfully elected.

Russia + Syria + Iran + Lebanon + Hezbollah = Love


Yes. Apparently, on January 31 2007 a Russian plain, coming from Syria, full with 600 containers of anti-tank Cornet rockets landed in Lebanon. The weapons are for Hezbollah, and were accepted by Hezbollah representative who also happens to represent Iran's Revolutionary Guard. Of course neither Russia nor Syria nor Iran nor Lebanon (of all countries) never heard of UN resolution 1701 prohibiting supplying Hezbollah with arms, but the cooperation, the cooperation is so touching.