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Aquarian Tangent

The redirection of a subject by a person born under the sign of Aquarius

Updated: 2018-03-05T22:34:14.823-05:00


Precious Peace


What do you say when your daughter is fighting for her life?
and it's hard and she feels the fine threads of hope stretched and frayed.

You read the posts of friends and family -
"You go girl!  Keep fighting! Fuck cancer! You can doooo it!"

Is that what she really wants to hear?
I feel like I'm cheering on a bloodied war horse in some
cruel brutal race, with red foam flying and weary heart pounding"

Will it win or fall, thankful for the peace and the end.

I want only to give her comfort.

Carrying on


Rocky road, where do you go.  

Will I see the glowing face of loved ones at the end of this path
or the end of joy?

I walk on looking for bits of light to follow.

God, help me.

Spring Makes Me Cranky!



This is a Vousa (technically, the Greek word for a toad on a log. How they get Toad-on-a-log from one little word is a mystery to me. But then so are a lot of things that are Greek - like my X). The word "Vousa" also refers to a crabby, petulant person who doesn't want to move (note the expression). Picture this creature crossing it's little arms and saying "hurumph!"

Every Spring, I can relate.

Spring is not a good time of year for me. It is chilly, windy and damp. The yard turns in to mud with ugly old plant material from last year sticking up. I try to take wonder in the tender little daffodils, hyacinths and crocus that are trying desperately to survive (only to be slam dunked by a late Spring snow freeze probably in April - Jeez is there an analogy there?), but it's not working for me.

I can't let Frick and Frack out in the already muddy yard because they will tear it up and come in looking like canine alternatives for a detergent commercial where kids are playing touch football in the mud (you know the one) and, damn it, it's cold, windy and raw out.


We toy with the idea of moving down South, but we really don't want to be away from the kids, babies, friends and activities here by the Lake. I try to fool myself into thinking that maybe the kids would come and visit if we lived in warmer climes, but actually, I know that I can hop in the car and drive for less than two hours to see everybody if I am truly in need of a family fix.

Next year we just might not come home from AL until April. So there ("hurumph!")

Old Beast with Dogs


(image) Saw this picture and I can see me doing this when I grow up. I wonder how in the heck she picks up the poop, though.

An Insight About Children


This bit of wisdom is so simple but at times, so hard to grasp. Sometimes you ask "why" and the answer is "It's better not to ask".

On Children

Kahlil Gibran

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let our bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

What Kind of Christmas Are YOU?


This is from a certain Rizzi Redhead that I know:

1. Favorite Christmas Song:
"Hark The Harold Angels Sing"

2. Age you stopped believing in Santa:
About 8. I could have sworn that I saw him in his sleigh flying over the city!

3. Real Tree or Fake Tree?
Up to now, real, but this year we actually bought a fake!

4. When do you open the bulk of your presents? Christmas Eve or Christmas Morning? Christmas morning of course!

5. Favorite Christmas movie or special?
Miracle on 34th Street with Natalie Woods.

6. What is your favorite type of Christmas cookie?
The sugar cookies my kids use to decorate. A Second would be the Spitzbuben that Nicole made.

7. Do you know the names of all of Santa's reindeers?? (without using Google) and which one would you be if Santa aske dyou to guide his sleigh???
Dasher, Dancer, Donner and Blitzen. Comet, Cupid, Prancer and Vixen...and, of course, Rudolph. Although, I'd probably be Prancer because I would fall down and get lost as stuff, and he would have to rescue me out in Three Oaks, MI.

8. When is the last time you make a snow angel? When I was a Freshman in High School.

9. What does your stocking look like? Blue velvet with a fuzzy white fur top (Paula gave it to me eons ago.
10. If your wished could be granted for 3 things this Christmas, what would they be??
  1. For Jack to have a 000 PSA test
  2. Cure for cancer
  3. Enough money to pay off our mortgage.

Have an Elfen Great Holiday From The Erwins


I just couldn't resist this. Make one yourself and post it! Check it out!

meme designed by burglars


OK, I'll bite. Here is my answers to Paula's burglars' meme:1. what kind of soap is in your bathtub right now?I don't know the brand. I have two; one is a citrus exfoliating bar and the other is a black lava purifying bar.2. do you have any watermelon in your refrigerator?Nope3. what would you change about your living room? I would have a fireplace and get tables that match together.4. are the dishes in your dishwasher clean or dirty? Dirty.5. what is in your fridge? Food and batteries.6. white or wheat bread?Lately, no bread.7. what is on top of your refrigerator? Oven mitts, flash lights and dog treats.8. what color or design is on your shower curtain?We have glass doors on our bathtub/showers.9. how many plants are in your home?I think - about 5. Right now they are all in a cluster on our back porch.10. is your bed made right now?Yep. I make it, but keep it folded open to air it out.11. comet or soft scrub? Neither.12. is your closet organized? It's - well - comfortably organized. It's not messy.13. can you describe your flashlight?We have the plain old battery operated flashlights and a couple of heavy duty rechargeables.14. do you drink out of glass or plastic more at home? Glass15. do you have iced tea made in a pitcher right now? No.16. if you have garage, is it cluttered? Slightly cluttered, but manageable.17. curtains or blinds? Blinds.18. how many pillows do you sleep with? One memory foam with a big kingsized backup.19. do you sleep with any lights on at night? Oh, God, no.20. how often do you vacuum?Two or three times a week (dogs-argh).21. standard toothbrush or electric? Electric mostly, sometimes I feel like using by standard brush, though.22. what color is your toothbrush?White.23. do you have welcome mat on your front porch?Gee, you know, I don't really know. No one uses the front door.24. what is in your oven right now?My griddle and a couple of huge pans.25. is there anything under your bed?Slippers.26. chore you hate the most? Cleaning windows. I never clean windows on a sunny day. You can't get rid of the streaks.27. what retro items are in your home?Lots of old photos. Us, actually.28. do you have separate room you use an an office?We have a third bedrood that we use as an office.29. how many mirrors are in your home?Six30. do you have any hidden emergency money around your home?Hidden money?!!!31. what color are your walls? Mostly warm taupe. My bathroom is god awful yellow. I was drinking when I painted it. I keep thinking of changing it.32. what does your home smell like right now?Hopefully, not dog. I have a great candle called Black Ginger. It's spicey without being too sweet. I love it. 33. favorite candle scent?See #32.34. what kind of pickles are in your refrigerator right now?I don't like pickles. Ask Jack.35. ever been on your roof?No.36. do you own a stereo?Yes, but we never use it. The CD player is broken. It's kind of a joke because I can only hear out of one ear.37. how many tv’s do you have?We have two working TVs and One tiny non-working one in the basement.38. how many phones?Four land based and two cells.39. do you have a housekeeper? Ha ha ha ha - no.40. what style do you decorate in? Comfy and whatever we have that fits.41. do you like solid colors in furniture or prints?We have a couch that is solid with printed pillows. It is sinfully comfortable. I guess I like solids best because you can always add printed pillows.42. is there a smoke detector in your home?Of course - and also a carbon monoxide detector. [...]

Ah! Lovely Australia


We just got back on Friday night. It was wonderful. Sydney is gorgeous. The people are great (No worries, Mate). We saw whales, koalas, tons-o-kangaroos, the rain forest etc. etc. The reef was absolutely awesome.The thing that sort of got me (no, not this really nasty spider) is that Australia is so beautiful and plays host to so many really deadly flora and fauna.This funnel spider, for example, not only can send you to the hospital, but it seems to really want to. They tell you, with an affable smile, "Check your shoes in the morning, Mate!"Then you have the Taipan. This little bugger is considered the deadliest snake in the world. There are 5 sub species of them on the East coast of Oz. (good on-ya, Mate!)Then you have this critter - the Cassowary. It can reach 6' tall. There are signs in the rain forest that tell you not to feed or provoke them if they should approach you. The signs remind one of the signage in the Western U.S. re. cougars. Basically they get mean and can rip you open.Think "Raptor" in Jurassic Park.We also did a "rain forest dream walk" with an aboriginal bloak. Really interesting stuff.See this rather perky little plant here? It's called a stinging tree. If you even stand too close to it, you will have severe pain from little nuerotoxin filled hairs on it's leaves and in the air around it, that can last for months. There are stories of people killing themselves to escape the pain. The aboriginal guy said pulling up the plants root and using it on the spot will ease the pain. But don't count on it.Then there are the wonderful box jelly fish that can give you cardiac arrest.No wonder these people have a sense of humor. No wonder they learn to love "Vegemite". (by the way, Zed actually had a little every morning on toast. He really tried to acquire a taste for it, but never really succeeded.)When they tell you "no worries", it's because they know what "worries" really can be.[...]

The Other side of the World



We are getting ready to go to Australia.

It hasn't really all sunk in yet. Everyone asks me about the flight. The flight is not freaking me out.

One thing that my thoughts keep coming back to: "What exactly is Vegemite?" I think that this is just a tangible thing that my brain can grasp, turn over and examine. The rest is all a big question mark looming in the time frame before me.

I do know one thing (for some reason). My Dear Husband will fit in perfectly.

Camp Erwin


FAUNA'S FABULOUS ADVENTURE CONTINUES...Well, here I am with my new friends, Trudy and Grace at Camp Erwin. Boy was I tired after a long ride with lots of nice people from Warren Michigan. I missed my Foster Mom, Lisa and my foster family and all, but there are lots of things to do out here, too. I've been a really good camper here at Camp Erwin. Mom takes me for walks with the other girls around the 'hood'. I'm real good at walking on a leash and could teach the other girls a thing or two about it. Here is my friend Gracie. She is an Illinois Bird Dog Rescue dog, too. We are getting to be best buds. She showed me around the yard and where all the bird nests are. I had to learn about the e-fence. The special collars that we wear let us know how far we can go out into the yard with out being bothered by the "Invisible Zap Monster". The collar beeps to let me know that the Zap monster is close. I like it 'cause I can run around and check out all the birds and stuff without worrying. My Foster Mom says I'm real smart because I learned really fast. Now when she gets the special beep collars out, I know I'll be havin' fun. Here is me and Trudy posing on the back porch. We are both setters and look like we could be sisters. Trudy was a little snobby when I first came, but now we play and run in the yard together all the time with Grace. When we all go for walks with My Foster Mom, she says that we look like a pointer between two setter book ends. Here we in the yard pointing at the doves in the apple tree! Grace stands guard next to the tree and watches these birds all the time. I get a little bored and have to play with Trudy some of the time. Here are the doves. There is a Momma and two babies. Yesterday, they flew away. My Foster Dad was all nervous about us messin' with the babies. But they are OK.It's real nice her and all, My Foster Mom is teaching me to "sit" and calls me for a treat about a zillion times a day. I went to a big dog show and met lots of people and was there to watch Trudy strut her stuff. I wish I could find a forever home, though, so I can have my own Momma and Dad like Trudy and Gracie do. [...]

The Girls


Yesterday, Jack said that I was eventually going to become a dodgey old dog lady (affectionately, of course). Grace & Trudy were stretched out on my lap and, when they got up, I was covered with white hair. Actually, I would be comfortable betting that, at any given moment, you could find white dog hair clinging to me somewhere. So much of my time is taken up by these creatures.

They are just mystifying to me, though. They love you when you are not even crazy about yourself. The only thing that I really can't give them is the opportunity to run for miles and miles after some bird. That gets them ticked once in a while. Birds and acres and acres of land are dope to bird dogs. That is one time when they forget about everything else.

Oh well.

My Favorite Season - NOT


Crap! It's Spring in the Midwest. One day warm and rainy and next day, cold and rainy. I know that I should smile beatifically and bat my eyes and say, "April showers - May flowers, etc." but I feel like a big old ugly green thing on a soggy, moldy old log. I am reveling in my foul mood. So just shut up.

The dogs are blissfully stupid about the mud in the yard. Zed is going a bit coo-coo about trying to preserve the grass. He sets up strange stick and string barricades in areas where he plants grass seed. The dogs pop over them as if they are fun agility obstacles just put up for their fancy.

Can't wait till the summer to swing the babies on the hammock. I knew that I bought that thing for some reason.

Where have I been?


I thought that I would throw some words in here to let everyone know that I'm still alive.

Winter is fast approaching and, for some reason, I think that it will be a good one.

My sister and I were on the phone expounding on how we have 5 grandchildren all in the same year! We are planning to have grandma camp sometime in the future. (Just for 2 days, though, lol).

Trudy & Grace re. The Twins



You knew that I had to include MY babies in this wonderful event:

The Twins


They are finally here! They are absolutely gorgeous. I went to help my daughter for a week after their arrival. The week flew by. She was doing great by the end of the week and I knew that it was time for me to leave them. (sigh).

Tired Tired and Dreary Dreary



February is my least favorite month. Any tolerance to the cold that I might have developed has been replaced with a dogged dread everytime I must venture outside the door.

Everything is black and gray for too long. I just want to curl up and sleep until the croci sproup - or better yet - the daffodils.

My 3rd Grandbaby!


(image) This little tyke is already dancing - Jazz hands and all.

I'm amazed at the family resemblance to my other two grandbabies! They could be cousins.

Jack and I are thinking ahead. We are going to have t-shirts made up saying "Camp Erwin - Where kids and dogs can be kids and dogs". Jack is remembering all kind of cop stories to tell them (not too violent) and I'll have to build a studio filled with lots of "newsprint" paper, crayons, markers, and finger paints. They will know everything about horses and dogs and, maybe, even learn to handle an agility course. We'll attach the wagon to the lawn tractor and Jack will make a squiggly track through the tall grass in the meadow. Jack will teach them the difference between a white pine and a red pine and an ash from a poplar.

Keep in mind, the grandbabies are just an excuse for us to finally do this! Yeay!

Psychotic Break


I'm usually pretty mild mannered, but...

I lost it on Saturday evening when I tried to accommodate and was confronted with hate . (ahem that rhymes - sort of like "If it doesn't fit, you must equit.")

This has happened about 3 times during the past 12 years. I pretty much have to feel like I have no recourse in order to compress and explode like that .

In retrospect, I could have handled the situation much more gracefully (the whole damn restaurant was staring at me when we finally left-sheeesh!), but when you lose it you lose it!

Sorry for the shock.

God - I'm Old!


These birthdays just keep coming faster and faster. A few more years (minus the pipe, but plus the shotgun and a couple more huntin' dogs) this will be me.

Just have to make sure my grand babies like dogs, apple cider and corn bread.

Simply Grace - Our New Addition.


(image) Yes, everybody, I have yet another dog.

We really weren't looking for another dog yet, but things come up and you wonder whether it is "meant to be". She is Grace. She's very careful and respectful with Socko (Socks totally approves of Grace - still gets ticked off at Trudy for being such a punk. I should have called her Mischief) and she's also young and fit enough to deal with the Trude with out getting aggressive. She is absolutely a sweet, gentle love and has attached herself to me already. I think that she likes that there are rules in the house. It makes her feel comfortable knowing where she fits it. (no beds, no furniture, except the chair and bench on the porch, eating from only your bowl at "foody time", no jumping, no begging.)

Trudy will always be my baby brat, sparkly star, and probably, when Socks passes away, The Boss, but Gracey is an exceptionally sweet dog.

She is only 2 years old. When she was found, she was 10 lbs less than she is in this picture. She had puppies! They don't know what happened to her puppies and she, apparently was very distressed about the loss of them. She has been spayed since and she is UTD on all her shots and worming. They also microchipped her.

She was total Velcro when she first came, but is gaining confidence and happiness every day.

We've discovered that clicker training works well with Grace. We are working on 1. recognizing her name, 2. follow me off lead, 3. come, 4. sit & 5. shake. This is a lot for her to work on, but we keep it at short and fun training sessions with lots of goodies. Trudy is the know-it-all teacher's pet and Socks is the principle.

The only flaw I can find, so far, is that she is not completely housebroken. We are working on that.

New Pix of the Twins!


Here is the latest picture of my grand-babies.

The baby in the Bottom Bunk is already practicing socker moves. The one on the Top Bunk is practicing (ahem) "fouettés".

In a couple of months, I think that my daughter will be bouncing down the street without even trying!

She's finished with her first trimester (yeay!).

Oh, My God! Little Ones!


I'm in shock! It has finally happened. My little one is going to have little ones (plural!) With this news, lots of memories of my prenancies came flooding back. ...and worries about my own baby Dina.

These little ones are very lucky because they will be surrounded by many loving people.

...and Louie will be a wonderful big brother (image)




My blog was trespassed upon by (ewwww) spam.

Parasites and scavengers in the wild are referred to as opportunistic feeders. They should add spammers and phishers under that category too.

It is very much like getting a case of hookworm, a parasite that can be gotten from just stepping in "it" - I guess the "it" in this case would be the WWW. If you don't go in and kill them first, they will polute your blog and kill it.

I activated the comment security thingy (a ha, you naughty little donkeys! Take that and die!) and deleted all the wonderful information about penis enhancement pills. I will continue to check my comments, hoping that they will continue cleanly from all my dear fellow bloggers and not - I'm amazed at the analogy here - spam infected crap.

The Fool on the Hill


(image) Most of the time I feel as though I am the fool on the hill. Even though I have people whom I love in my life, I am separate. I am an "other". I watch. I listen and understand. I'm not really a part of the machine. I really never have been. I've written poetry about this when I was young. I am still there. I wouldn't know how to act if, all of a sudden, I was included. I know that I value my solitude. So, I guess, It is of my own doing.

My husband is definately part of the machine. I watch him moving and shaking things; connecting with people all the time, every day. I'm amazed that he loves me.
He has a gift.

It's funny. Once in a while, when I really want to participate, I try to be part of the picture. But, I'm a wrench. I am weird - a polysided peg in a round hole.

I've learned that I am loved by a few and I am who I am. I guess that there are people who are movers and shakers who are still very alone.

So..I sit on my hill. I appreciate what life has given me and I watch the horizon for what comes next.