Warning: Stupid celebrity gossip manufactured daily
Last Build Date: Sun, 05 Oct 2014 08:19:02 +0000
Thu, 28 Jun 2007 16:03:00 +0000
ASHTON KUTCHER "THE MISSING LINK"
Tue, 21 Nov 2006 13:45:00 +0000
Male chimpanzees have a penchant for a toyboy lifestyle and would far rather pair off with an older female than find one of their own age, a study has found.
To a young male chimp there is nothing so attractive as wrinkles, sagging skin and bald patches in a female who is old enough to be his great-great-grandmother.
So strong is the male urge to find an older partner that fights frequently break out over rights of access to the oldest female chimps in the tribe.
DEMI MOORE IS NOT EXACTLY A SAGGING, WRINKLED OLD CHIMP BUT THEN AGAIN I CAN SEE ASHTON KUTCHER SWINGING FROM A TREE AND CHEWING ON A BANANA.
MIKE TYSON TO BE A PROSTITUTE
Fri, 17 Nov 2006 15:37:00 +0000
Former boxing champion Mike Tyson is to become a male escort after agreeing to work at legendary Hollywood madam Heidi Fleiss' new legalized brothel for women. Fleiss bought 60 acres of land in Nevada, and his work is scheduled to begin on Heidi's Stud Farm.
She has high hopes for Tyson, once heavyweight champion of the world - despite the fact he is a convicted rapist.
She says, "I told him, 'You're going to be my big stallion.' It's every man's fear that their girlfriend will go for Mike Tyson."
Tyson, 40, adds, "I don't care what any man says, it's every man's dream to please every woman - and get paid for it."
ROCKY BALBOA, THE FINAL FINAL CHAPTER
Thu, 16 Nov 2006 19:25:00 +0000
MGM chief Harry Sloan says that Rocky Balboa will probably be the last installment in that franchise, because Sylvester Stallone's title character will be too old for the ring.Fear not Rocky fanboys, I'm sure if this one is a success, they will find a way. It seems far too likely that Rocky Jr. will someday step into the ring to defend his father's honor. If Rocky V had made more than $40 million domestically (In comparison, Rocky IV made over $300 worldwide), I'm sure they would have made a Rocky VI a lot sooner.YO ADRIAN, CAN YOU BRING ME MY WALKER...
ABUSED MAID SPEAKS OUT ABOUT NAOMI CAMPBELL
Thu, 16 Nov 2006 16:35:00 +0000
New York, Nov 16: One of Naomi Campbell`s many ex-employees has filed a second lawsuit against her former boss, tacking verbal abuse and defamation onto her already lengthy list of grievances.
Gaby Gibson, who worked as Campbell`s maid from November 2005 till January 2006, stated in papers filed on Tuesday in New York that the hot-tempered supermodel is a "violent super-bigot" who "subjected her(Gibson) to repeated discriminatory assaults based on her national origin."
The runway rebel`s ex-maid also said that the famously feisty bombshell mocked her broken English and smacked her around because she couldn`t find a pair of Campbell`s jeans, reports the New York Daily News.
CHECK OUT NAOMI'S NEW PRODUCT LINE, ONTIME FOR THE HOLIDAY SEASON...MAID KICKING BOOTS
(image) BRASS KNUCKLE PIMP SLAP PURSES
ANGER MANAGEMENT NEEDED KNIGHTLY
Thu, 16 Nov 2006 03:46:00 +0000
Does Bobby Knight need anger management?
Texas Tech coach Bobby Knight wasn't commenting Tuesday on video replays showing him slapping the face of forward Michael Prince for committing a turnover.
The incident was caught on videotape by ESPN during a second-half time-out, and shows Knight smacking Prince with an open right hand, the Dallas Morning News reports.
After the game, Knight complained about the poor attendance for the game Texas Tech won 86-74 over Gardner-Webb. He made no reference to slapping Prince, who scored two points in 11 minutes in the game. The victory was Knight's 871st.
OJ SIMPSON TELLS ALL; HYPOTHETICALLY SPEAKING OF COURSE
Wed, 15 Nov 2006 21:53:00 +0000
O.J. to speak out hypothetically
O.J. Simpson is planning to speak out about the murders of his ex-wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, and her friend Ron Goldman in a Fox special titled, "O.J. Simpson: If I Did It, Here's How It Happened."Simpson was acquitted of the 1994 murders, but was later sued in civil court, where he was found responsible and ordered to pay $33.5 million in restitution to the victims' families.
Simpson's book, "If I Did It," which hypothetically describes how the murders would have been committed, is slated to hit bookstore shelves Nov. 30.The Fox interview, to be conducted by publisher Judith Regan, will air at 8 p.m. CST on Nov. 27 and Nov. 29.ReganBooks is a subsidiary of Fox parent News Corp.
Although Simpson has denied committing the crimes, he will describe how he would have carried out the murders if he were guilty, according to a Fox news release.
Looks like OJ is hard up for money! What an idiot!
BORAT TAKES A BEATING FOR "The Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan"
Mon, 13 Nov 2006 16:17:00 +0000
Borat - aka Sacha Baron Cohen - has been attacked after a prank backfired.
The comedian - who created the fake sexist and racist Kazakhstan reporter Borat - approached a man in New York and said: "I like your clothes. Are nice! Please may I buying? I want have sex with it."
The man didn't find his comments funny and punched Cohen in the face.
Cohen cried out for help, but his pleas were ignored and he was repeatedly hit.
A source told Britain's The Sun newspaper: "Sacha couldn't resist playing the fool as Borat, but he picked the wrong person. I guess this guy thought he was being attacked by someone unstable and lashed out. Sacha is very lucky he didn't get a much worse beating."
Film bosses are pleading with Cohen, 35, to stop posing as Borat on US streets to avoid further violent attacks.
Cohen's new movie, 'Borat: Cultural Learnings of America For Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan', is tipped to become the highest grossing comedy of all time.THIS AN'T KAZAKHSTA, BORAT AND NEW YORK CITY DON'T PLAY THAT. JUST TRY SAYING GOOD MORNING TO SOMEONE ON THE STREETS OF NEW YORK AND SEE WHAT KIND OF BEATING YOU GET!
VATICAN AT ODDS OVER CRUISE'S WEDDING
Fri, 10 Nov 2006 17:50:00 +0000
(image) Vatican at odds over Cruise's wedding
Vatican officials pondered the conundrum of whether to grant a Roman Catholic wedding to a divorced celebrity and prominent Scientologist, amid feverish speculation yesterday over Tom Cruises imminent marriage to Katie Holmes somewhere in Italy. After a pre-wedding party with other Hollywood celebrities on November 16, a Catholic wedding ceremony is planned for November 17. A final ritual
is planned for the next day, to be conducted by members of the Church of Scientology.FOR YOUR AMUSEMENTMENT STUPID-N-FAMOUS WAS ABLE TO OBTAIN PICTURES OF THE PLANED "TRADITIONAL SCIENTOLOGY WEDDING CEREMONY"
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HOLYFIELD 44YRS OLD AND STILL SWINGING
Fri, 10 Nov 2006 04:57:00 +0000
44-year-old Evander Holyfield doesn`t care what people say. He remains determined to be boxing`s undisputed heavyweight champion.
``No man can tell me to stop what I`m doing,`` Holyfield said. ``God can. He`s the only one.``
The former champion`s chase for another title continues Friday night when he meets Fres Oquendo in a scheduled 10-round bout at the Alamodome in San Antonio.
Holyfield, who began his comeback in August with a fight in Dallas - a second-round technical knockout of West Virginia insurance salesman Jeremy Bates
- dismisses critics who say he`s too old, too slow and taken too many punches to be back in a title pursuit.
``I promised myself that I would become undisputed heavyweight champion. And I`m 44 years old, but I haven`t reached that goal,`` Holyfield said. ``That`s why I`m here. I set the goal and I`m sticking to it. That seems to bother a lot of other people. It doesn`t bother me.``I GOT MY MONEY ON DA' "INSUWANCE MAN!"
IT'S TUFF BEING ALEX BALDWINS KID BROTHER
Thu, 09 Nov 2006 20:57:00 +0000
Having played a detective on Homicide: Life on the Street, you'd think Daniel Baldwin would know better.
The 46-year-old Baldwin brother was busted Wednesday by police in Santa Monica, California for allegedly stealing an SUV in nearby Orange County.
Officers spotted a scruffy-looking Baldwin in the parking lot of a local motel as he climbed into a white GMC Yukon that had been reported stolen and took the Car 54, Where Are You? star into custody.
A search of his motel room subsequently turned up narcotics and drug paraphernalia. He was transferred to a local police station and booked for investigation of grand theft auto and possession of illegal drugs. Bail was set at $20,000.HOW STUPID DANIEL? NEXT TIME YOU GET CAUGHT COMB YOU HAIR BACK AND SAY YOU NAME IS ALEX.
WHAT'S IN YOUR CLOSET? THE BILL COSBY SETTLEMENT
Thu, 09 Nov 2006 18:28:00 +0000
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania - A woman who said Bill Cosby drugged and sexually assaulted her at his home outside Philadelphia, has settled her lawsuit against him.
Terms of the settlement will remain confidential, according to a one-paragraph statement released jointly by both sides.
The woman claimed that Cosby, 69, assaulted her at his mansion in Cheltenham in early 2004 after giving her pills. Attorneys for Cosby say the comedian gave the woman Benadryl allergy tablet after she complained of stress and sleeping problems.
The federal judge presiding over the case earlier denied Cosby's request for a gag order and the plaintiff's request to shield the names of a dozen other women who say Cosby assaulted them. Some of the accusations raised by the other women go back for decades, and none have pending lawsuits filed against him.
SHOCKER! KEVIN FEDERLINE SEEKS MONEY AFTER DIVORCE FILLING
Thu, 09 Nov 2006 16:34:00 +0000
Federline, an aspiring rapper, appears to want a slice of his wife’s multi-million dollar fortune in addition to custody of his children, with the documents revealing that he will seek spousal support too.
"Kevin is prepared to go the distance in order to do what he feels is necessary to protect and safeguard the children and will not be intimidated or dissuaded from pursuit of those goals," said Michael Sands, a spokesman for Federline’s lawyer, Mark Vincent Kaplan.
Reports have said that Spears, who has sold more than 76 million records wordwide and is the eighth best-selling female artist in US history, was protected against a costly settlement through an "iron-clad" pre-nuptial agreement. Her fortune was estimated at around $120 million by Forbes in 2004KEVIN, GO BACK TO THE TRAILER PARK YOU CAME FROM.(image)
MORE BAD NEWS FOR THE UNIVERSITY OF MIAMI
Wed, 08 Nov 2006 20:56:00 +0000
The 22-year-old defensive tackle trained as usual in the afternoon, but was pronounced dead in the car park outside his apartment at around 1930. Pata was in his fourth year with the Hurricanes and was expected to be selected in next spring's NFL draft.
Miami-Dade police spokesman Roy Rutland confirmed Pata's death was being treated as murder. "My son had a problem with nobody," a tearful Pata told WTVJ-TV in Miami: "He's gone, he's gone."NOT TO MAKE LIGHT OF YOUR SONS DEATH MRS PATA, BUT....THERE ARE ABOUT 40 FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL FOOTBALL PLAYERS THAT COULD BE SUSPECTS.
THE SUM OF ALL FEARS; A Republicans Nightmare
Wed, 08 Nov 2006 17:36:00 +0000
On Tuesday, the Republican nightmare came true. The Democrats won a majority in the House and Nancy Pelosi, a liberal from one of the nation's liberal districts, was set to become speaker of the House, the highest ranking lawmaker in the 435-member chamber.ALL I CAN DO IS CRY, "LORD HELP US"!!!(image) (image) (image) (image) (image) Somebody shoot me! Where is Al Queada when you need them?
BRITNEY FILES FOR DIVORCE
Wed, 08 Nov 2006 04:01:00 +0000
(image) Britney Spears cites irreconcilable differences in divorce papers....HAHA HAHA YEAH SHE CAN SING AND HE, WELL NEED I SAY MORE!
LOS ANGELES (AP) - Britney Spears is saying bye-bye to Kevin Federline. The pop princess filed for divorce Tuesday from her husband, former backup dancer and aspiring rapper Federline. ...
The Los Angeles County Superior Court filing cites "irreconcilable differences.
Spears, 24, married rapper Kevin Federline, 28, in 2004. They have a 1-year-old son, Sean Preston, and an infant son who was born Sept. 12. The divorce papers identify the baby as Jayden James Federline.
A message left with Spears' attorney, Laura Wasser, was not immediately returned. Spears married Federline eight months after ending a 55-hour Las Vegas marriage to her childhood friend, Jason Alexander. Her second marriage has provided endless fodder for tabloids, which have speculated frequently that the union was in trouble.NOW IF ONLY KFED WOULD ABANDON HIS PATHETIC MUSIC CAREER WE COULD BRING BALANCE BACK TO THE UNIVERSE
Jessica Simspon: what is up with your mouth.
Tue, 07 Nov 2006 15:33:00 +0000
Sex-starved Jessica Simpson used the Internet to find a new man, but her search ended in disaster when the mystery date turned out to be a male escort reports Australia's NW Magazine. "Jessica logged on [to an Internet matchmaking service] to find company," reveals a friend. "She found a picture of a guy in LA she thought was ideal."
"They arranged to meet, but when she turned up, she found out the sad truth - he was only interested in a 'professional transaction'. The guy turned out to be a male escort."Jessica Simpson fled the scene as soon as she realized she'd been tricked. "Jessica was horrified and told him to go to hell," says a pal. "She wasn't that desperate."
I can see why she is out surfing the net for a date.......Something is just weird about those lips. Waaaaaayyy to much callogen. The freakiest mouth in showbiz (beside of course the magical mystery tour himself, Michael Jackson.)
DOOGIE HOWSER'S A BUTT BUDDIE
Tue, 07 Nov 2006 15:17:00 +0000
(image) TV's Doogie Howser the latest celebrity to be outed publicly
TORONTO (CP) - Neil Patrick Harris, television's beloved Doogie Howser, made an announcement late last week: he told the world he was gay.But his hand was undoubtedly forced by a Canadian website, CanWest's Canada.com, which reported Oct. 23 that Harris had secured a role for his "longtime sweetheart," David Burtka, on his new show, "How I Met Your Mother."In response to the item, Harris's publicist at first denied his client was gay, but before long Harris made the announcement confirming he was a "very content gay man." On Saturday, Canada.com did a followup to the story beneath a headline that read: "Public statement sparked by Canada.com column."
DOOGIE'S A FUDGE PACKING, PICKLE LICK'N, BALL SLURP'N, BUTT BUDDIE.......WHO KNEW?
HANG' EM HIGH
Mon, 06 Nov 2006 16:39:00 +0000
(image) Asa Lama Lega freak!
Iraq's former president Saddam Hussein was sentenced to death by a criminal tribunal on Sunday, sparking angry demonstrations from his fellow Sunnis even as Iraqi Shias celebrated the verdict.
Iraq's High Criminal Tribunal handed down the death penalty to the ousted president and two of his senior aides for the Dujail case.
Saddam's half-brother and former intelligence chief Barzan Ibrahim and Awad Hamad al-Bandar, chief judge of Saddam's Revolutionary Court, were sentenced to death over the execution of 148 people of Dujail during a crackdown on the town after a failed assassination attempt against Saddam in 1982.
The former vice president Taha Yassin Ramadan was sentenced to life imprisonment, while the other three Baath party local officials from Dujail received 15 years each.When you hang a man, you better hang'em high! Okay got it, but I do have one question? When he is dead can we drag his body through the streets of Baghdad?
BRADGELINA TERRORIST PLOT
Fri, 03 Nov 2006 22:30:00 +0000
Pune, India (AHN) - Police are now looking into a media report concerning a threat to Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt from Al Qaeda. The couple is in Pune, India for a film shoot.
A top police official said, "We have learnt about the threat to Jolie and Pitt and the news that they have been provided Y-category security from the media which quoted the Intelligence Bureau. We have not received any communication in this regard from our headquarters in Mumbai."
He told the Press Trust of India, a meeting was arranged to hammer out issues related to the security of the celebrity couple in the city.Jennifer Aniston has confirmed she is now the newest member of Al Queada!
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA !!!! You Suck, kanye!
Fri, 03 Nov 2006 16:59:00 +0000
(image) (image) I will never listen to another Kanye album again (well, I said that when he pulled the last crap) I will never read or write about him again (after this).
Alright, I already didn't like this guy, but what an arrogant little whiner. I mean, geeeeeeez I can't help put want to punch something just looking at his puny little snarl face.
Last night, MTV awards, Europe.
He got up on stage (un-invited) when the real WINNERS of MTV's best video award, Justice and Simian, were on stage receiving THEIR award, and this is what he WHINED:
"$#%@ dis! (My video) cost a million dollars, Pamela Anderson was in it, I was jumping across canyons and s#@%
! If I don't win, the awards show loses credibility. Nothing against you (Justice and Simian), but hell man."And then...
He spouted, "I haven't seen (the Justice and Simian video). Possibly it could have been quite good but no way better than Touch The Sky. That is complete bull&%#t, I paid a million. Obviously it's not all about the money, but the response it got transcended everything, it really made great TV. It took a month to film; I stood on a mountain; I flew a helicopter over Vegas. I did it to be the king of all videos and I wanted to walk home with that award."HE IS SOOOOOOO IGNORANT !!!!! WHY DO PEOPLE GIVE HIM MONEY. HE SHOULD BE COOKING ME DINNER AT A FAST FOOD CHAIN OR AS JOHN KERRY WOULD SAY HE SHOULD BE A SOLDIER IN IRAQ.
If this sucka would have got up when I was getting the award, he would have gotton a pile driver on front row and then slapped over his inflated, crybaby, head with his darn Video award. Now thats a video !
BUSH HAS THE LAST LAUGH
Thu, 02 Nov 2006 21:11:00 +0000
(image) School Bus Driver Fired After Flipping Off Bush
(AP) SEATTLE A school bus driver fired after she reportedly made an obscene gesture at President Bush has filed a union grievance in an attempt to get her job back.
The 43-year-old driver, whose name was not released, was driving middle school children back to school after a zoo visit on June 16 when the president and Republican Rep. Dave Reichert drove slowly by in a motorcade.
From the bus, the children waved; with the windows down in their car, Bush and Reichert waved back. That's when the driver gave the president the finger, according to Reichert and Issaquah superintendent Janet Barry. "The congressman hadn't seen it, but the president turned to him and said, 'That one's not a fan,"'
UNO DE NIRO reduced to 50 CENTS
Thu, 02 Nov 2006 18:12:00 +0000
Rapper 50 Cent and Robert De Niro are in negotiations to co-star in the police thriller, New Orleans. According to the Hollywood Reporter, the movie is set against the backdrop of Hurricane Katrina.
New Orleans centers on a police officer who thought his partner was killed by Hurricane Katrina, but soon discovers he was actually shot. 50 Cent will play De Niro's new partner and as they investigate the murder, a world of police corruption is uncovered. According to the Hollywood Reporter, the project was originally set in Los Angeles, but was moved to New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina devastated the city.
BREES vs. BREES
Thu, 02 Nov 2006 16:27:00 +0000
AUSTIN - New Orleans Saints' quarterback Drew Brees has asked his mother to stop using his picture in TV commercials touting her candidacy for a Texas appeals court.
"I think the major point here is that my mother is using me in a campaign, and I've made it known many times I don't want to be involved," Drew Brees said Monday.
Mina Brees, an Austin attorney, is running as a Democrat for a spot on Texas' 3rd Court of Appeals. She said replacement commercials that omit any mention of her son were taped last week and sent to stations on Friday.
She said she did not anticipate upsetting her son and that "everything in the ad was true."
She said her connection to football is relevant to her campaign because her father, a successful high school coach, used sports to teach her a strong work ethic that she would bring to the judicial bench.