2016-09-07T17:57:55-07:00Selling a one-of-a-kind, never been seen before, work of art. And it's FAST! I've had it up to 70mph and was afraid to go any more. I call it Tauntaun, after the snow lizard in Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back.
2016-08-21T23:39:24-04:00Vader Fire Pit! See flames at night in eyes and mask. 44 Wide x 54 Tall approximately (Not including smoke stack). Outside use only. Delivery available. Mask opens to load wood. Door opening 24 wide x 12 Tall. See on website @ stateofthearcmetalwork.com.
2016-09-26T15:00:48-06:00I was looking for blank cassette tapes at the thrift store to make some mix tape of my own when I found yours.
2016-08-01T12:49:55-07:00Special unique version of the Starship Enterprise.
2016-08-02T18:51:15-05:00These vintage phones were handused in Austin, Texas at a boutique call center. These classic communication devices come complete with a curly accent cord and collector's edition taupe plastic finish. The phones have a finely aged yellow patina from 24-hour fluorescent light exposure over the past 25 years.
2016-07-12T11:30:31-04:00About me: Also known as 'Golbat-chan' on sites like 4chan and imgur, I am a 24-year-old lifelong Pokemon enthusiast who wants to help YOU become the very best.
2016-07-15T16:14:36-04:001984 Chevy shorted in great shape with a perfect camouflaged paintjob. 4 wheel drive like new interior, very clean windows. low miles.
2016-05-19T18:33:30-06:00I am looking for old Mormon artifacts from the book of Mormon. I would like to purchase items from the days of the Nephites and Lamanites such as shields, arrows, bows, knives, or any of the other items that they might have used in there battles, anything would be great. I would also love to have maps, pottery, coins, statues, vases, or any artifacts from the large city of Zarahemla or Mulek. If some one had any writing in reformed Egyptian that was apparently used I would like to see it.
2016-05-25T22:43:42-07:00Requires assembly. You Pick Up! I need the space!
2016-04-19T22:45:10-04:00You "arr" lookin at a used Pirate ship for sale by the " ownarr" she is equipped with 3 cannons and a skeleton crew! Please, serious and qualified Pirates can " parlay" with Captain Dan
2016-07-20T15:08:26-04:00Never date a corporate lawyer. Here's how it goes. You match him on Tinder and give him a chance even though he ghosted you after one date. You never get an explanation for this beyond "I was looking for something specific," which sounds like another lawyer or some Woody Allenesque waif-bot, but most Brooklyn dudes want that, so fuck it. He has nice hair. He apologizes, claims to hate True Detective, and laughs at all your jokes.
2016-07-16T09:46:30-05:00I met you in the cafeteria about a week ago at the University of Chicago Medical Center. We struck up a conversation about chemotherapy and insurance premiums. You spoke of your ailment of having crohn's disease and I spoke of my battle with breast cancer. You were slightly taller than me and had a sleeve arm tattoo which I admitted liking... While we were talking, I began to tear up while informing you that my prognosis was elevated to stage 3 and that stage 4 means terminal. You were very attentive and held my hand as I explained my fears about it. As the conversation moved towards the weather and where we each respectively parked, you advised me to park in a different garage, one that I wasn't aware of and that was closer. 'Here, give me your number,' you said me. 'I'll text you with what it looks like.' Without hesitation I did and really only with the expectation that I wouldn't have to walk so far (It's not good to be on chemo and walking in the hot weather). As we parted ways and left for the day, I got home and assumed you forgot to text me. However as I set my phone down on my counter, suddenly it vibrated to an unknown number's text. When I opened up the text in my in my condo which had dim lighting at the time, I saw a beautiful rod appear on my phone's screen. The glow shined on my face and penetrated my spirit. I really felt it change me. Even though you had not shared your name previously, I knew the dong I was viewing had belonged to you because I had recognized your hand holding up the miniature coke cola bottle next to your penis. Stripping down from my clothes, I was elated to see 4 more pictures arrive as I began to do what any woman would do and self enjoy them. Following the pictures, you also texted me the following lines over the duration of the next hour but I was busy in the bathtub violently masturbating.... "Hey" "You there?" "Yo what up?" "Did you like?" "Hey" "Want more?" "Hey it's me, how r u" After finishing up my gratuitous session of various climaxes to the sounds of a saxophone in the background, I decided to light a cigarette and write about the occurrence in my diary while contemplating how I would respond to your communique.... Admittedly, I had also taken a deluxe-gigantic-shit, known in medicine as a 'dgs' while I was writing and my phone fell into the toilet. The next day I took it to apple and they refused to touch it and said it was impossible to access your number. And unfortunately by the time I got a new phone with my same number, your texts had stopped :( I was preparing to get over you. It was just yesterday that I came in to the hospital for another round of chemo, still very sad our saga had come to an end because of my phone falling into the toilet bowl filled with my poop and pee. That's when my doctor came in shortly after drawing up my blood and feeling my tiddays, catching me completely by surprise by with what he told me next.... "You don't have breast cancer anymore. You are cured. Please see Shelia at the desk who can validate your parking and call if you have a headache." Grabbing his arm as he began to walk out the room, I just had to be sure... "What did you say?" "Your breast cancer is totally cured. Judging by the tests we have done with our fancy medical equipment and group of Asian people in the labs who were looking at tubes and stuff, we can find no more blast cells in your boobies. You don't have breast cancer anymore. You are now perfectly healthy." "That's impossible, I was stage 3 last week," I told him. "The only thing that changed was that a man sent me a series of dick pics to my phone...." It was here my doctor put his hand on my shoulder and gave it to me straight. "That was not a man. That was an ange[...]
2016-07-08T05:39:56-07:00Employed or students. I have no use for the 2 up stairs rooms except to rent them as studios. 12x14 south side studio with sunny balcony, 140 degree view of the sky, partial view of snow capped mountains. The 10x14 west side studio can be used as a sun tan room, view of cross streets, large closets. 2 bedroom, 1 1/2 bath apartmint that I'm leasing long term. South side studio is rented, UNR graduate, male. Studios are unfurnished except for kitchen appliances. Silent running portable room refrigerator/freezer, microwave, toaster oven, hot plate, 2 foldable 34" square tables with 2 foldable padded chairs. Portable door security lock that can be used when your in your studio or bath room. Carpeted. You can use the kitchen sink. I've removed my property from the up stairs full bath. I won't be using the up stairs bath much. The down stairs living room, kitchen an 1/2 bath is my studio. I don't have a bed. I don't sleep. I do get tired. I have a roll up mat. $300 monthly rent an $300 security deposit, includes utilities, wifi, 532 channels tv. Buy wireless stereo head phones if you want to listen to music or television. No lease required. I don't care if you have a guest over for one or two nights per week as long as the guest has their own home an is employed or student. I don't smoke. I don't care if you smoke in your studio, seal the bottom of your door, automatic self sealing air vents. Central heat/ac. No parties or illegal drugs. Professional Horse Race Player. Retired Chevron gas station operator. Inventor. Expert stock market investor. Diablo Valley College graduate 1984, AA, AS, Computer Science, Pleasant Hill, Calif. Graintarian not vegetarian. There are billions of salt an seasuning eaters in the world. There are very few raw flesh eaters. Advertisers use women that are on starvation diets to sell food an drinks. A professional chef told me that you can make any thing taste good. Graintarians don't produce foul body odors. I still eat plain cheese pizzas. 6'2", 200 pds. I'll teach people to become rich in the stock market, no charge, its simple, 500 words. They have to be able to invest $100 per month into the stock market for 20 years. I think that the stock market is a better investmint than real estate if you know how to invest in the stock market. Horse racing is classified information. I'll teach people the basics of horse racing or class 101. Women love horses. However there aren't very many women that bet on horse races. Penny Chenery, breeder an owner of Secretariat, set records in horse racing that today haven't been broken. Secretariat is the winner of the Triple Crown, 1973, the highest honor in horse racing. What I don't under stand is why trainers an jockeys don't know how to earn their living betting on horse races. They know how to train an ride horses, however they don't know how to bet on horse races. John Wayne, great western movie star of the 30's thru 70's wouldn't of been allowed to join the U.S. Cavalry. You couldn't join the cavalry if you weighed more than 160 pounds. John weighed 200 pounds. Today, forget about a career in Hollywood if your taller than 6'2" or weigh more than 180 pounds. In Japan, all forms of gambling are banned except horse racing. There are no casinos in Japan, only horse race tracks. 6 months ago, China became part of international horse racing. I've reported to the American an Canadian horse racing association that Japan, China an all other countries should not be allowed to bet on American or Canadian horse races until they up grade their standards of information to meet or exceed the standards of American an Canadian horse race tracks. I won't bet on Japanese or Chinese races until they up grade to American an Canadian standards. I [...]
2016-07-08T14:28:27-05:00To the Handsome Police officer that pulled me over trying to catch Pokemon at 2 in the morning. I just want to say, you are gorgeous, that is all.
2016-06-18T07:49:24-05:00I was at Campus Pub/Jims, showing off my RealDoll. I was a tad hammered that night. I must have let 2 guys show the doll to one of their friends, & they didn't come back before closing time. I don't remember their exact names (& neither do my friends unfortunately), but I do recall two faces, 2 white males. The original idea for this was to be my up & coming post grunge band's stage mascot. I was in the process of recruiting additional members for our band. A police report has been filed with Murfreesboro/Rutherford Co. Police Dept. This doll was rather expensive. Thank you.
2016-06-26T14:55:15-07:00Radically customized '27 Dodge. All metal, powered by a '96 Geo Metro automatic, 4 cyl, 3 speed. Gets mid to upper 30 MPG. Power seats, AC, heater, convertible top, working fold out windshield & cowl vent, daylight running lights. Pinky has been an excellent ministry tool for us and our hope is she can continue as such. Call & let's negotiate.
2016-05-29T17:53:15-04:00My crested gecko Nigel needs the love of a good woman. It is preferable that said woman is also a gecko (not that he's closed minded, I just don't see how it would work any other way).
2016-06-27T18:00:50-07:00I was the blue-eyed brunette in black leggings who asked you if Trader Joe's was still selling collard greens on Sunday, June 26. While you checked in the back, I texted my roommate about the "adorable produce guy at TJs". You reported back to me the bad news; then while I decided on my alternate, you arranged all those greens - the kale, the romaine, the spinach, the micro-greens - in the most immaculate formation I have seen. It was artistry of the type I see in pine cones. When I finally decided on the kale, I clumsily knocked another bag down with it and you had it picked up and put back in half of the blink of an eye. Then I ran away - just me, my regret, and my organic Tuscan kale.
2016-06-27T10:28:26-07:00What happens when ex-Ferrari F1 engineers toss back a few beers with ex-Rolls-Royce craftsmen? They create the 2012 Kia Sorento EX. But wait, before you continue reading, you need to ask yourself . . . Why wouldn't you want to replicate the feeling of riding on a majestic dual-horned unicorn? Now, be warned, this beast is not for everyone. If you're a guy or gal that can handle Kardashian levels of attention from the paparazzi as you drive around your neighborhood, you don't want to pass up this offer. The power plant derives from the V12 Ferrari F12 Berlinetta. . . kinda. . . sorta. In order to fit the all-aluminum, race-bred engine under the hood, the engineers had to cut it in half. As it sits, the now 3.5L DOHC CVVT V6 engine produces 276hp (horsepower) or about 800cp (centaurpower) The power is delivered to the ground by a 6-speed automatic transmission with Sportmatic mode. Once Sportmatic is engaged, forget about Tesla's "Ludicrous" mode and get ready to go plaid. Now, I don't recommended using Sportmatic mode when there are children under the age of 6 years old or under 48 inches tall in the vehicle, as it may stunt their growth or put you on the watchlist at your local Child Protective Services office. As powerful the engine is, it sips fuel like a sommelier sips wine. It's rated at 16-31 mpg depending on the altitude, weather and road rage conditions, and I've been able to maintain a healthy 22 mpg average. Since I'm Middle Eastern, I've only used the finest motor oil from my uncle's private family reserves in Dubai. Not even Lamborghini has access to this type of lube. Because owners of such unique machines are always VIP, Kia's skunkworks division equipped the Sorento with safety features to keep its owner and some occupants safe. I say "some" because it has a special "Mother-in-Law" button tucked away in the ashtray. Once engaged, you'll hear a voice say "you're welcome," then sensors will deactivate only the safety features around your mother-in-law. It also has an impressive list of acronyms like ABS, TCS, ESC, LATCH, TPMS, PMS and STD. The interior has been designed with luxury and environment in mind. The seats, steering wheel and shift knob are wrapped with the hide of Japanese Kobe beef cows. To balance the opulence of the leather, the ex-Rolls-Royce craftsmen meticulously printed a wood pattern on plastic trim pieces throughout the vehicle. Infinity actually played Sting's hit song "Desert Rose" over 250,000 times until they tuned the audio system to replicate what it might sound like if you listened to that song in acoustic form in a bathroom stall. To keep you connected, the Sorento has all sorts of USB ports and Bluetooth. The technology doesn't stop there -- it also has a Push Button Start system in case you have carpal tunnel and can't twist a key, a back-up camera so you no longer have to rely on your drunk friends when hitching up to your yacht and a digital compass so you can feel like Christopher Columbus as you navigate through traffic. Speaking of navigation, it has that too. The sleek exterior is reminiscent of works of art only found at the Guggenheim museum. The silhouette has been designed to mimic a liger moments before pouncing onto a jackalope. To achieve the design philosophy of "Meosjin Maelyeog" or "Fabulous Glamour," chrome can be found almost everywhere. It has so much chrome that I constantly get asked if it's been in rap videos . . . Yes, yes it has. You may think that such a machine would cost about $194,432.78, and you're right, it did . . . when it was new. But today, I will[...]
2016-04-25T17:53:52-07:00Name: Melvin the baby zombie hand
2016-05-10T16:56:45-05:00I regret it but selling my custom built Motorized Bicycle, please look at the photos for more details.
2016-04-02T13:35:17-07:00Dear Craig, Whoever the heck you are, I really don't care. I was buying something about 20 years ago when a friend of mine said something about Craigslist. I really did not pay any attention. I didn't care, and I sure wasn't going to trust the advice of some dude named Craig, who I didn't even know existed. Now, 20 years later, I just made a very cool trade on Craigslist, that was done only because I really love a good story. Last night a woman called about a used walker that I had for sale on Craigslist for fifteen bucks. She doesn't know that I actually bought it used, and only paid five dollars for it. The woman was willing to drive over to my place about twenty or so miles from where I live, and she happened to live next to Val's Burger's on the border of Castro Valley and Hayward. I told the lady who was calling me that if she bought me a burger from Val's that I'd give her the walker for free. She laughed uproariously, and we ended up spending about half an hour talking about all our good memories of eating at the best burger place in the entire San Francisco Bay Area, that somehow is still almost a little hole in the wall that most people have only driven past, or never even heard of. I told her how I'd once sold an item on Craigslist from a man from New Zeland who claimed to be an "International Chef" traveling through the United States. I told the man if he bought the item I was selling, I'd come down in my price by three hundred dollars on one condition: We all had to go eat a burger at Val's Burgers, and if he didn't think it was one of the best burgers he'd ever eaten, then I'd drop three hundred off the price. Needless to say, I didn't have to drop the price, because he said, "This is one of the three best burgers I've eaten while traveling the United States. It's really very good. I should have listened to you, and got it on the toasted, sliced sourdough." So, Craig, who the hell are you? Why did you ever dream of doing this cool thing, called Craigslist? I just want to thank you. Free. I get to sell stuff for free. I get to have a cool story that I am one of the only people who has ever had Val's delivered to his door step, twenty miles away. I ended up giving the woman ten bucks, and the walker, in exchange for two Val's momma burgers, and the steak fries. What a great deal. My apologies to those of you who choose to refrain from eating certain foods if this post finds some offence. I see woman who are posted on Craigslist with prices attached to various services. I believe in free trade, and only hope that these women are willingly offering those services. I know of people who use Craigslist to post fake ads, selling things they don't even own, ripping people off, etc. Sure, we know there are some very sick individuals who have used Craigslist, and other forms of communication, to harm and even kill other people who fell into a trap, sadly, because they trusted someone who was not worthy of their trust. I'm willing to bet that the average Craigslist user like me has made some bunches of sales for stuff on Craigslist that benefited both seller and user. I bought a bike rack the other day from a guy who didn't even have to get out of his car on High Street in Alameda, and I handed him the thirty bucks he requested in his ad only two or so hours previously. We both got what we wanted, at something like eighty percent off retail, all for free. I have no freaking idea how Craig makes money off this site, except that there ar[...]
2016-03-24T04:29:00-05:00"Mentalpus Can't Make It Stop"
2016-04-28T07:22:22-07:00A rare find, this one-of-a-kind Internet original is now available to the public for a limited time.
2016-04-15T11:44:35-07:00My wife said it her or the van. I thought long and hard but came to the decision that, as much as I love this vehicle, I loved her more. My kids would choose the van.