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The Science Creative Quarterly



Last Build Date: Mon, 26 Sep 2016 16:11:56 +0000

 



10 QUESTIONS I HAVE FOR SCIENCE

Mon, 26 Sep 2016 16:00:07 +0000

1. In the not-too-distant future, a tree will fall in the forest. Is there any chance it will have been knocked over by some kind of rampaging robot? 2. When the world’s armies are finally equipped with laser rifles, how difficult will it be for a civilian to get his hands on one, and do you think it would totally blow up a squirrel or just burn a hole in it? 3. Hypothetical situation: a gigantic black hole is about to swallow the Earth. All human life is doomed. Question: would you happen to know any women who don’t want…



THE CELL-ECTION: ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL

Thu, 22 Sep 2016 14:41:40 +0000

It’s election time! Whether discussed in casual conversations or featured in heated arguments, the campaign trail is one that many have followed. The highly anticipated day when voters take to the polls will ultimately lead to huge changes on a number of fronts. The major parties have advertised their platforms on many occasions and statistics suggest leaders remain in a close race. With polls revealing no indication of a sure winner, the leaders are undoubtedly seeking to appeal to undecided voters. We now begin live coverage of tonight’s final debate in this year’s Cell-ection. – – – Moderator: The leaders…



REALISTIC INDIANA JONES MOVIES

Mon, 19 Sep 2016 15:23:43 +0000

Indiana Jones and tomb that had already been looted by robbers in the 19th century Indiana Jones and pottery fragment #1478 Indiana Jones and the site discovered under somebody’s house so there was no way to actually dig it Indiana Jones and the famous treasure that actually turned out to be an ancient chamber pot Indiana Jones and the temple of maybe three damaged columns Indiana Jones and the Intro to Archaeology class for students that don’t give a shit and just want to pass for general education credit – – – (Originally published at Commander of Trash)



HIPPOPOTAMUS

Fri, 16 Sep 2016 15:40:17 +0000

Many years ago, a hippopotamus decided to learn typing. As you may imagine, the task was difficult and discouraging. The hippopotamus however was unusually persistent. First she learned the parts of the typewriter, then she studied all available typing manuals, (even one for an antique which had neither name nor function in any western language; It could best be likened to a linotype machine which set type for haiku poetry in Japanese.) and finally she enrolled in a good secretarial school. In spite of her diligence, there were some practical difficulties; in fact so many that the best of her…



CANCER IMMUNOTHERAPY: A BRIEF INTRODUCTION

Wed, 14 Sep 2016 13:55:00 +0000

Over the past few decades, cancer therapy has advanced in leaps and bounds. Despite this improvement (and also spurred on by it), scientists and researchers are constantly looking for newer and better ways to treat cancer patients. Traditionally, cancer patients are treated with chemotherapy, radiation therapy or surgery. Chemotherapy is a treatment that uses drugs and radiation therapy uses high energy waves to kill cancer cells. However, both treatments don’t only affect cancer cells. They can be extremely toxic and have many severe side effects, as they are systemic treatments, meaning that they can affect cells all over the body,…



DONALD TRUMP WRITES A SCIENCE GRANT

Mon, 12 Sep 2016 14:13:43 +0000

Principal Investigator: Trump, Donald. Title: The Best Biology Aims: Do a lot of things and see what happens. Background and Significance: I did very well in school. I learned a lot of things. Innovation: We will do a lot of things that have never been done before, and then we will do them again. Research Strategy: We will do genetics of really important plants and animals – not minerals, we won’t do minerals. We will produce a lot of data, a lot. Big data. Ten thousand more than everyone else. Summary: Trust me, we will do it. It will be…



LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT JOHN MICHAEL GRIFFIN, JR.

Sun, 11 Sep 2016 17:55:49 +0000

– FROM THE ARCHIVES –Griff, as he was known in high school, was a friend of mine. In fact, late in the first half of our lives, he stood up for me physically and philosophically, for being a science geek. Truth is, John’s endorsement was the first time I was ever deemed cool for wanting to be a scientist. It is also years ago on this day, that Griff died an engineer and a hero in the collapse of one of the World Trade Center towers. We lost touch almost twenty years before, but his kindness and generosity formed not…



IDENTIFICATION AND LOCALIZATION OF THE SANEW GENE IN MAGICAL WOLFSBANE (ACONITUM ALUPUS)

Fri, 09 Sep 2016 17:11:31 +0000

Annals of Praetachoral Mechanics (2016). Vol 2. Advanced online publication. download pdf ABSTRACT For more than 100 years, those suffering from werewolfism have relied on the Wolfsbane Potion to maintain cognitive abilities during transformation. Recent developments in biotechnology and biochemistry have allowed for in-depth study of the chemistry and genetics of magical plants such as Aconitum alupus, the most important herbal component of Wolfsbane Potion. A recent study identified mesaconitine as the potion-active metabolite of A. alupus, though the details of its biosynthesis have not yet been elucidated. In this paper we reported the discovery of the gene SANEW which…



SILLY EXAMPLES OF THE INAPPROPRIATE USE OF SCIENCE JARGON

Wed, 07 Sep 2016 17:58:30 +0000

Monday Night FootTESTIS Hootie and the FUGU RUBRIPES Winnie the FECES MASTICATEbacca the Wookie Tchaikovsky’s BERTHOLLETIA EXCELSA-cracker Suite I can’t believe it’s not TWO BUTTOCKS AND AN ANUSer Joani PRODUCES OXYTOCIN FOR Chachi Bye bye Miss American CIRCUMFERENCE DIVIDED BY THE DIAMETER Chairman FELINE VOCALIZATION’s Little Red Book Hey FORNICATE FORNICATE, the Cat and the Fiddle. The Facts of STEM CELL / ZYGOTE / BLASTOCYST / EMBRYO / FETUS / NEWBORN



SURVEILLANCE SONNET #73

Tue, 06 Sep 2016 18:28:20 +0000

Light comes in many colors: ROYGBIV, above, below, between. Cables bring light across borders, so we’re closer than we’ve ever been. Optical fiber cables carry light with digital information. That info contains the phone, Net, and TV of a nation. That time of history thou mayst indeed behold In which kings and soldiers take back…