Last Build Date: Tue, 22 Nov 2016 22:07:01 +0000
Tue, 22 Nov 2016 22:07:01 +0000My Dad was/is exactly like this, he's always the victim. I always come away feeling guilty and like I'm in the wrong. I still struggle with this even after marrying am amazing man who really tried to understand my struggles with words, and manipulation. Honestly, my biggest fear is becoming my Dad. I see him in myself and I do not want to manipulate my husband or my children (if and when we have them). I am so glad I found this website, is been a great comfort to me in the past week.
Tue, 22 Nov 2016 21:47:19 +0000I've been on the troubled end of this. It has made me physically ill.
Fri, 18 Nov 2016 22:45:37 +0000I am a Masters Student studying Vocal Performance and Opera. I have found that failure as a musician is much harder for singers because our instrument is inside of us, and when we perform poorly, we feel like it is a reflection on our worth as an individual. What would you say to those of us studying singing about the connection to Voice and Self?
Tue, 15 Nov 2016 19:12:20 +0000Dr. Robert Hare perhaps has been the leading researcher on psychopathy in modern times. He is the developer of the checklist used to identify psychopaths and other seriously disturbed characters and the risks they pose. His book "Without Conscience" is well worth the read.
Mon, 14 Nov 2016 20:51:51 +0000You quote "Hare". Who is "Hare" and is there a citation? Thank you.
Fri, 11 Nov 2016 02:22:25 +0000Dr. Simon, thank you very much for the insights you have enabled me on past and current relationships where I have enabled exploitative behaviours to me. I'm am currently trying to improve on setting boundaries without offering the other person 'excuses' about why I won't fulfill their demands and expectations: that is, simply stating 'no'. I'm also noting, with some wonder, how I can actually see the cogs and machinery whirring in their response to my altered approach. Very intellectual and assessing - why could I not see this before?! Now it is so apparent. Just as, when I look at my own behaviours towards others I can see how. I've elicited this in a number of relationships with people. Thank you, most sincerely.
Thu, 03 Nov 2016 17:03:18 +0000My mother exactly does this, playing dumb. She likes the attention of Drs. and requests invasive medical tests for normal conditions of aging. If one Dr. does not order the test for her she goes to emergency, if that doesn't work she goes to the walk in clinic. When I explain to her to go and read about women's health in the library, she says "I don't go to the library". "I don't read books". By this she means that she has no interest in learning that her health problems are normal, because then she would not be able to keep going to the Dr. many, many times. She goes around town telling everyone about embarrassing health problems. If any Dr. tells her practical advice such as talking a short walk, quitting coffee and smoking, she ignores the advice and keeps doing these things she was told not to. She thinks her problems take priority over everyone elses and that she should not have to wait for appointments or test results. Then she will tell everyone that the Dr. is no good and will not help her at all. If she gets an invasive test done (of course they find nothing) she will complain of being sore, tired, and still having the same problem. I am at the point now at age 46 that I want to just be done with her and her nonsense.
Thu, 03 Nov 2016 14:50:07 +0000are you sure you can glibly interchange the words "psychopath" and "sociopath" like that? great article otherwise and much needed. those higher up in management need to be called out for their abusive behaviour.
Tue, 01 Nov 2016 21:22:49 +0000Dr. Simon This entire article was so accurate, it is if someone has been looking over my shoulder. I have always known in my gut, but you get so beat down and exhausted from trying to figure out what is happening in your life. Why are people willing to believe so much in what the gas lighter is doing? My husband and possibly others (his family) have done this to me. To the extent my own family barely believes anything I say. This has destroyed my life, wrecked so many relationships and I have felt absolutely broken, suicidal and alone. I'm scared because I feel in danger if I was to manage to get someone to believe he's capable of this. Currently I have started intense therapy and I'm looking for a good divorce lawyer. So sad though because although he's hurt me terribly, if and when he's exposed it will devastate my children. Signed, broken hearted in Ohio.
Mon, 31 Oct 2016 12:32:16 +0000Do you have information on what's being done to improve mental health services to military service members? Any resources to utilize or people to talk to? How can we go from talking about what needs to be done to acting on it?