The Banquet Manager is on Facebook

2009-11-06T05:56:52.057-05:00

Here's some of the Banquet Manager's favorite comments from readers in the month of October.  Thanks for adding your voice to this blog and keep them coming.On "New York Bar Serves Up Wine in Baby Bottles"Manker said:"Gives new meaning to "bottle fed" ! :)On "What the F*%$ Did She Say" Purplegirl said:   "Some corporate genius decided the hosts should tell you all that stuff instead of the servers, and the hosts get their asses reamed if they're caught not doing. They also get reamed if anybody stands at the door for more than five seconds without being acknowledged. I imagine she was trying to split the difference since some corporate ass clown decided to add to her workload."On "Don't Bitch About The Payroll"Native Napkin said: "I don't envy you and your job: almost constant training, transient help, and bridezillas. Give me my A-Type hyper-egoed cork dorks in the restaurant every time."On "WTF, That's Not Charcuterie"Chicago Banquet Guy said:"Unfortunately, I don't have to worry about presenting food like that. Our clients aren't willing to spend the extra money. I have to deal with people who want a buffet of fried chicken and corn. So, I don't have to worry about presentation, and the "WOW" factor. I just need to have plenty of fried chicken and cold beer, and my guests are all happy." On "I Can't Stand Meeting Planners"Anonymous said:"I'm not a meeting planner myself, but I work conferences and smaller meetings as part of my job. I totally sympathize, and would like to add that sadly, the attendees really are that stupid. No amount of idiot-proofing has ever been enough. (Btw, this is my first comment, but I really like your blog!)"On "Read Brides Worst Wedding Guest Stories" Skippymom said:"Forgetting the groom's name reminded me of the following:  The priest at my father's funereal said his name wrong 4 times until I leaned over the front pew and hissed at him his correct name  My mother still hasn't forgiven him."On "Where Are All The Banquet Managers?"Fort Mac Manager said:"I work too much especially coming into Christmas party season to post most of the time ,but I do throughly enjoy readng your posts. Keep em coming, makes me feels better about my job."On "You Never Setup The A/V Equipment"BB said:"I hate when people show up early and then expect everything to be ready! Last time I was bartending a private party some of the guests came an hour before I was even scheduled to be back there to set up and then were complaining because they didn't have any service. Arg, people annoy me." Next Post: The Dreaded Wedding Breakfast Share[...]

Holy Shit...The Sprinklers Went On!

2009-09-10T11:39:16.544-04:00

We're doing a party the other night out on our deck. The sun is setting, the wine is flowing and the guests are having a great time. Since the party is going so smooth, I decided now was the time to sneak into the kitchen and steal a quick meal for myself. Then it happened...

One of my waiters came running into the kitchen screaming, "The sprinklers went on and everybody's getting wet"! WTF...

I race outside to see everyone running around trying to find cover from the water jets that are spraying their ass. People were really pissed-off and the host as mad as a wet hen.

We're still trying to find out why the hell the sprinklers went off when they did but you know what? It was funny as shit to see it happen. A first for me.

It's times like this when I love my job.

Next Post: NO NO NO, You Can't Switch Shifts

We Forgot To Pass The Champagne

2009-09-10T11:39:38.597-04:00

Everything went off without a hitch. The guests of honor were happy the entire party. Their 25th wedding anniversary was a huge success. The shrimp cocktail was full all night, the piggies-in-the-blanket were crisp as requested and the strawberry shortcake was moist as planned. Ah, a good night for the "Banquet Manager".

Then it happened...as the group left the room when the party was over, the contact (the daughter) said "I wasn't going to spoil it for my mom and dad but you forgot to pass the champagne when they arrived and the party was ruined". "I'm writing a letter to your boss to complain" came next. The party was ruined, WTF!

Why did you wait until you're walking out the f'in door to mentioned this? Ok, ok, I know we dropped the ball but you could have mentioned this 4 hours earlier and we would have done it then. Buy NOOOO, you don't say a thing and allow our "small" error to become a sledgehammer that you are holding over our heads. BITCH!

This time, here comes MY ass kickin'.

I need a REAL job!

Next Post: Holy Shit, The Sprinklers Went On!

Another Reason To Avoid The In-Room Coffee Makers

2009-09-08T10:31:29.177-04:00

Quite often, hotel guests stay away from the in-room coffee because it either tastes like crap, the machine is difficult to figure out or worse yet, it costs money. But now there could be another reason to avoid the in-room coffee machines--they could really mess your hand up.

From the NY Post:

Former Columbia University researcher Kristopher Karnauskas yesterday filed a $10 million suit against an Arizona hotel, claiming its percolator shattered in his hand, hurting him so badly he couldn't attend his meeting then next day as planned.

And what's more, the 27-year-old climate scientist claims he can no longer play his trumpet. His conflict with the carafe took place in January at a Phoenix Marriott, where he'd planned to deliver a speech.

A shard of glass severed a hand tendon, he said.

Thankfully, there's a new trend on the horizon in hotels to use Keurigs or other single-cup coffee makers in the rooms, meaning we don't have to do deal with any glass percolators. But it will take a while for the big brands to get these installed in all of their rooms. Until then, you might be better off dragging yourself downstairs for a cup of coffee.

Related Stories:

• A Hotel Made of Ice and Snow
• What's On Those Hotel Bedspreads?

Next Post: We Forgot To Pass The Champagne!

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