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Quotes of the Day



Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page



Published: 23 Mar 2017 00:25:02 -0000

Last Build Date: 23 Mar 2017 00:25:02 -0000

 



Robert Benchley

Thu, 23 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people."



Logan Pearsall Smith

Thu, 23 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"The denunciation of the young is a necessary part of the hygiene of older people, and greatly assists in the circulation of their blood."



B. F. Skinner

Thu, 23 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"Education is what survives when what has been learned has been forgotten."



Joan Baez

Thu, 23 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"The only thing that's been a worse flop than the organization of non-violence has been the organization of violence."



Lech Walesa

Wed, 22 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"I'm lazy. But it's the lazy people who invented the wheel and the bicycle because they didn't like walking or carrying things. "



Dame Rose Macaulay

Wed, 22 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"It is a common delusion that you make things better by talking about them."



Barry Commoner

Wed, 22 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"Nothing ever goes away."



Steven Wright

Wed, 22 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates... When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, 'Do I know you?'"



Ellen DeGeneres

Tue, 21 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it's worse when they are wearing dark glasses and have streamers in their antlers because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot."



Thomas H. Huxley

Tue, 21 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"Science is nothing but trained and organized common sense, differing from the latter only as a veteran may differ from a raw recruit: and its methods differ from those of common sense only as far as the guardsman's cut and thrust differ from the manner in which a savage wields his club."



Cary Grant

Tue, 21 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"I improve on misquotation."



Unknown

Tue, 21 Mar 2017 00:00:00 GMT

"I'm not worried about the bullet with my name on it... just the thousands out there marked 'Occupant.'"