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NSA snoops told: Get your checkbooks and pens ready for a cyber-weapon shopping spree

Sat, 25 Feb 2017 00:38:55 GMT

US Cyber Command boss lays out plans for next decade

NSA and US Cyber Command boss Mike Rogers has revealed the future direction of his two agencies – and for the private sector, this masterplan can be summarized in one word.…




Engineer who blew lid on Uber's toxic sexist culture now menaced by creepy 'smear campaign'

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 23:56:25 GMT

Who could possibly have a grudge against Susan Fowler?

The engineer who claims Uber is rife with sexism and lying executives has said someone is researching her background for a smear campaign.…




Don't worry about Privacy Shield, it's fine. Really. I promise, says US trade watchdog head

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 22:57:21 GMT

It's not fine

The acting head of the US Federal Trade Commission, Maureen Ohlhausen, has sought to assure people that the critical Privacy Shield data-sharing agreement will hold up despite President Trump's recent executive orders on immigration.…




Toxic Uber sued after driver allegedly tried to rape passenger in car

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 21:22:03 GMT

Taxi app maker liable because its cabbies are interchangeable with robots, lawsuit claims

Uber, facing scrutiny for its "toxic" culture of sexual harassment and for alleged trade secret theft from Alphabet's Waymo, has been hit with yet another lawsuit alleging that one of its drivers attempted to rape a passenger.…




Pai, Pai, Mr American spy: FCC supremo rips up privacy protections for broadband punters

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 20:53:51 GMT

No need for ISPs to tell you what info they're slurping up

New rules due to take effect next week that would have required your ISP to obtain consent before selling your private details have been killed off by the new chair of the US Federal Communications Commission.…




Surveillance software boss thrown in the clink for cooking the books

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 20:13:53 GMT

Comverse CEO Kobi sent down for a record 2.5 years after back-dating stock options

The head of a defunct surveillance and communications software company has been given the longest-ever prison sentence for back-dating stock options.…




Finally proof that Apple copies Samsung: iPhone 7 Plus halts, catches fire like a Galaxy Note 7

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 19:29:46 GMT

Teen's shock as Jesus mobe turns into hottest tech

Vid Demonstrating yet again that Apple trails Samsung in mobile phone trends, an iPhone 7 Plus owner has reported that her prized possession recently blew up on her.…




Brocade SAN sales butchered by hyper-converged upstarts

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 18:44:40 GMT

Fibre Channel revenues flag as Broadcom acquisition spooks IP network buyers

It was a double whammy. Brocade saw hyper-converged infrastructure eat into its SAN networking sales as Broadcom acquisition-caused uncertainty drove IP Networking sales downwards too.…




Mysterious Gmail account lockouts prompt hack fears

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 17:31:04 GMT

Something happening here, what it is ain't exactly clear

A substantial number of Gmail users have been affected by a potential but unconfirmed hack of unknown origin or purpose.…




Artificial intelligence 'will save wearables'!

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 17:01:09 GMT

Can you hearable me?

When a technology hype flops, do you think the industry can use it as a learning experience? A time of self-examination? An opportunity to pause and reflect on making the next consumer or business tech hype a bit less stupid?…




Microsoft offers Dynamics 365 data-sucking stoppage

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 16:29:07 GMT

Cloud CRM with cloud synchronisation turned OFF

A version of Microsoft Dynamics 365 with cloud turned off is coming in the second quarter.…




Symbolic IO reveals tech bound to give server old guard the willies

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 15:58:04 GMT

The new Ferrari of the storage world

Analysis Symbolic IO has rewritten the server hardware and operating system rule book with its its computationally defined storage (CDS) and says apps like database queries run 60 times or more faster on its system. If these claims are real then server suppliers like Cisco, Dell, HPE and others are in for a mighty market shock as one IRIS server could replace five or more standard servers.…




Alert! The dastardly Dutch are sailing a 90-ship fleet at Blighty

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 15:29:10 GMT

We'll have no repeat of 1667, ye lubberly scallywags!

The Dutch are preparing to invade English seas with a fleet of 90 vessels after a previous expedition boarded the Royal Navy’s flagship and stole the Royal Coat of Arms from her.…




Oh, irony of ironies: Gov.UK's transparency report reveals... nothing

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 15:05:25 GMT

Windows of volcanic glass

The British government has published a transparency report into the use of disruptive and investigatory powers by State actors, which ironically reveals absolutely nothing about the use of said powers.…




New UK laws address driverless cars insurance and liability

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 13:55:09 GMT

'Automated' vehicles – who pays for damage?

Insurers would be primarily responsible for paying out damages stemming from accidents caused by "automated vehicles" under new UK legislation laid before the UK parliament.…




Bring it BACK... with MODs! Psion 5 storms great tech revival poll

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 13:06:13 GMT

The AA-powered, pocket-sized touch daddy

The Psion Series 5 has stormed a Reg poll of technologies readers would most like revived.…




Facebook scoffed at $500m damages. Now Oculus faces nerd goggles injunction

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 12:25:09 GMT

Nice one, Sheryl

Sometimes it's wise not to boast that you're so rich, a $500m damages award against you is chump change.…




Visit banter.com. More like International BANTS Machines, amirite?

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 12:01:13 GMT

Top bants, guys. Archbishop of Banterbury-tier stuff

IBM staffers might not feel there's much to laugh about at the moment, with more swathes of redundancies on the way or the directive to kill off home working, but at least there's still plenty of banter to be had at the firm.…




BT, Ericsson square up to Arqiva, Samsung over 5G arms race

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 11:06:47 GMT

Let the hype wars commence

Hot on the heels of Arqiva revealing plans for a 5G trial with Samsung this morning, Ericsson and BT have also announced a partnership to develop 5G projects.…




Red Hat’s Jen Krieger joins Continuous Lifecycle lineup as keynoter

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 10:28:08 GMT

Clock is ticking on early bird tickets

Events We’re very happy to reveal that Red Hat’s Jen Krieger will be delivering a keynote at Continuous Lifecycle London, our three-day DevOps, Agile, CD and Containers conference this May.…




I want it hot and wet – preferably with Wi-Fi

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 10:16:17 GMT

Put the bamboo down and step back

Something for the Weekend, Sir? I came too soon. Normally this is not a problem. Coming early allows me to regather my strength so that I can then go at it, full-on, for the next eight hours.…




Can you fly with the Vultures? The Reg news desk is hiring

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 09:32:09 GMT

Experienced reporter wanted

The Register is looking for an experienced reporter to join its lively London news desk.…




Omg, that is, like, sooo 2007... Retromania set to grip this year's MWC

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 09:00:06 GMT

Can Nokia and BlackBerry save us from this 'turgid sea of sameness'?

Analysis Hold the front page! Nokia's launching a bunch of new phones this weekend, and everyone is very excited.…




Is your AI being handed to you by Google? Try Apache open source – Amazon's AWS did

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 08:35:11 GMT

'Community' can buy what money can't

Open Source Insider Surprisingly, the MXNet Machine Learning project was this month accepted by the Apache Software Foundation as an open-source project.…




Your future boss? An employee-interrogating bot – it's an open-source gift from Dropbox

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 08:01:12 GMT

Did you mean to type "rm -rf /" or should we be concerned?

Dropbox has released the code for the chatbot it uses to question employees about interactions with corporate systems, in the hope that it can help other organizations automate security processes and improve employee awareness of security concerns.…




Sysadmin's sole client was his wife – and she queried his bill

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 07:27:13 GMT

It all ends in beers after marital bliss and commercial reality collide

On-Call Welcome again to On-Call, our weekly look at readers' memories of hibs gone bad.…




Google to annihilate online trolling with ... tra-la-la! Machine! Learning!

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 07:01:07 GMT

God, is there nothing artificial intelligence can't master? We all know you love it so much

Google and Jigsaw, an Alphabet incubator, hope to tackle online trolling with the launch of Perspective: a new piece of software that uses machine learning to highlight “toxic comments.”…




The final 5G technical performance specs have been set

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 06:34:05 GMT

This ain't over yet by a long shot - ratification roadmap stretches to 2020

The International Telecommunications Union (ITU) has published a draft of what it expected to become the final 5G specification.…




For telcos and enterprise vendors, MWC 2017 will be an Edge/Fog/SDN/NFV-fest

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 05:58:12 GMT

Compute and storage is coming out of the core and into the light

Mobile World Congress kicks off next week in Barcelona and, as ever, is two shows in one. Gadget-lovers get to go “squee!” about new handsets and the fun they'll have with them. And in the fun and important part of the conference, telco wonks discuss the plumbing that makes the “squee!” possible.…




Swedish politician wants weekly hour of paid sex. For exercise

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 04:58:07 GMT

Workers told to get on the job while on the job, to boost local population

A Swedish municipality may allow its workers to get on the job while on the clock, for an hour each week.…




Motorola's modular Moto Z: A fine phone for a weekend away

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 03:58:09 GMT

And grand for everyday use, but the modules just don't excite

Hands-on Motorola's modular Android, the Moto Z, offers something genuinely new in the increasingly dull world of smartphones.…




South Korea targeted by cyberspies (again). Kim, got something to say?

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 03:06:15 GMT

Vulnerabilities in Hangul word processing program exploited

The South Korean public sector is once again in the firing line of a sophisticated – and likely government-backed – cyberattack.…




FCC lops off red tape around small US ISPs, y'know, things like having to own up about connection speeds

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 02:05:33 GMT

And hidden fees and pricing

The FCC has granted pricing and speed reporting exemptions long sought by small US broadband providers.…




Cloudbleed: Big web brands leaked crypto keys, personal secrets thanks to Cloudflare bug

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 01:47:39 GMT

Heartbleed-style classic buffer overrun blunder strikes in 2017

Big-name websites leaked people's private session keys and personal information into strangers' browsers, due to a Cloudflare bug uncovered by Google researchers.…




We want Waymo money from you! Uber sued for 'stealing self-driving car' blueprints from Alphabet

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 00:41:07 GMT

How could app maker's week get any worse? Glad you asked

Alphabet's self-driving car outfit and Google stablemate Waymo is suing Uber, alleging theft of trade secrets and patent infringement.…




HPE CEO Whitman says everything's 'on the right track' as sales are literally decimated

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 23:59:35 GMT

And more than half the biz working overseas on the cheap

HPE's financial results for the first quarter of its fiscal 2017 are in, and they don't look good. Profits are flat and the servers, storage and networking divisions have shown double-digit declines in revenue.…




How to nuke websites you don't like: Slam Google with millions of bogus DMCA takedowns

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 23:35:53 GMT

Copyright allegations wreck search rankings

Analysis Big corporations are abusing the system for taking down files and links to copyright-infringing content by sending millions of fake links, according to Google.…




Amazon goes to court to stop US murder cops turning Echoes into Big Brother house spies

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 22:59:21 GMT

'Alexa, am I being murdered?'

Police in the US believe an Amazon Echo overheard the murder of a bloke found dead floating in a hot tub. All the cops want is a copy of any audio recorded by the personal assistant, conveniently stored in Amazon's cloud.…




MIT goes down to the wire: Brain cable pipes electricity, chemicals, light straight into minds

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 22:09:00 GMT

Polymer highway into the head promises easier neurological monitoring

MIT brain boffins have developed a tiny fiber that can carry chemical, electrical, and optical signals back and forth between the brain and an external device, offering an improved path for testing brain functions and interactions.…




I was authorized to trash my employer's network, sysadmin tells court

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 21:13:21 GMT

Michael Thomas' appeal will send shockwaves through IT industry if successful

Back in December 2011, Michael Thomas did what many sysadmins secretly dream of doing: he trashed his employer's network and left a note saying he quit.…




US 'security' biz trio Sentinel Labs, Vir2us, SpyChatter accused of lying about certification

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 20:28:17 GMT

Watchdog forces them to drop claims of privacy protections

Three US companies have settled with the FTC after they were accused of lying about the security safeguards on their customer information.…




People built AI bots to improve Wikipedia. Then they started squabbling in petty edit wars, sigh

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 19:00:04 GMT

Most argued articles include Pervez Musharraf, Niels Bohr and Schwarzenegger

Analysis An investigation into Wikipedia bots has confirmed the automated editing software can be just as pedantic and petty as humans are – often engaging in online spats that can continue for years.…




'First ever' SHA-1 hash collision calculated. All it took were five clever brains... and 6,610 years of processor time

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 18:33:07 GMT

Tired old algo underpinning online security must die now

Google researchers and academics have today demonstrated it is possible – following years of number crunching – to produce two different documents that have the same SHA-1 hash signature.…




Brit lords slip 30Mbps Universal Service Obligation into UK Digital Economy Bill

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 17:35:04 GMT

Eleventh-hour amendment, but will it stick with government?

An eleventh-hour amendment has been added to the UK government's Digital Economy Bill, proposing an increase of the Universal Service Obligation from 10Mbps to 30Mbps.…




Ad men hope blocking has stalled as sites guilt users into switching off

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 17:02:05 GMT

How many swallows do you need for a summer? One will do

The adoption of prophylactics to protect users against advertising failed to rise in 2016, according to pollsters YouGov.…




Ex-employees sued for £15m over data slurpage ordered to pay up just £2

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 16:38:09 GMT

Brit firm 'missed the jackpot', says High Court judge

The High Court in London, UK, has agreed that a company's former employees who took thousands of confidential files away on USB sticks when they quit the firm were indeed naughty – and ordered them to pay damages of just £1 each.…




KCL external review blames whole IT team for mega-outage, leaves managers unshamed

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 16:04:08 GMT

And the Oscar for the best story about why you have recovery tests goes to...

Exclusive An external review into last October's catastrophic data loss at King's College London has placed the blame squarely at the feet of the IT technical team, which it found neither understood nor followed the university's system for backing up data.…




Managed file transfer peeps Axway gobble sharetakers Syncplicity

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 15:33:04 GMT

Creating 'a one-stop shop for digital shared services'

French managed file transfer (MFT) company Axway has bought file sync and share supplier Syncplicity.…




Elon Musk promises Tesla investors Trump won't send him to Mars

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 15:02:08 GMT

I expect to remain with Tesla forever... and ever, and ever

Amid larger than expected losses at Tesla, founder Elon Musk promised he would not be diverted by a mission to Mars and intended to stay at the company "forever".…




Become a blockchain-secured space farmer with your hard drive

Thu, 23 Feb 2017 14:35:04 GMT

Google Ventures-backed Storj Labs makes its pitch

Startup Storj (pronounced storage oddly enough) has an open source, distributed cloud object storage platform using blockchain technology and end-to-end cryptography across a peer-to-peer network to secure files.…