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Preview: My Boring Ass Life

My Boring Ass Life



Kevin Smith's Boring Ass Life



Last Build Date: Fri, 22 May 2015 16:48:22 +0000

 




Fri, 22 May 2015 16:48:22 +0000

MY DAD AND HOW HE MADE ME LIE TO THE CLERGY If he was still with us here in the land of the living, today would’ve been my Dad’s 78th Birthday. This photo, taken at the party after Harley’s baptism, perfectly sums up the dynamic of our relationship: we looked at stuff together in silence. [...]



I’m Not Happy

Thu, 21 May 2015 18:55:38 +0000

I’ve been around 44 years now, and I’ve been a round boy for most of those years as well. I always imagined thinner people were happier than me – but after losing 80 pounds, I can’t say that I’m any happier than I was as a fat-ass. I’m not complaining, mind you: I just imagined [...]



Of Bats and Walruses…

Tue, 08 Jul 2014 18:14:23 +0000

There’ve been a few movie websites reporting I might’ve been involved in a BATMAN v SUPERMAN: DAWN OF JUSTICE misinformation campaign, at the behest of Warner Brothers, director Zack Snyder and producer Chuck Roven. The idea was that everything I’ve ever said about the forthcoming big screen team-up of the World’s Finest is a carefully [...]



15 YEARS AGO, I RUINED A WOMAN’S LIFE

Fri, 25 Apr 2014 15:32:38 +0000

15 YEARS AGO TODAY, Jennifer Schwalbach and I took the worst wedding photo ever at Skywalker Ranch in Marin County, California. We were in the midst of the DOGMA mix, staying on the property. I had come home from the sound stage and an already way-pregnant Jenny said “It’s so beautiful up here. If we [...]



I FINISHED MY SECOND PODCAST-BASED SCREENPLAY!

Fri, 24 Jan 2014 17:37:21 +0000

If you listen to the EDUMACATION podcast, you’ll remember that episode 20 (Part 2 of the Christmas eps) consisted of another dopey conversation that resulted in a screenplay – a’la SModcast and TUSK. I was goofing around with Mr. Edumacation himself, Professor Andy McElfresh, when we accidentally brainstormed a Christmas horror anthology that would eschew [...]



REST IN PEACE, MR. MALLRATS…

Tue, 21 Jan 2014 16:53:52 +0000

In this picture above, from the set of MALLRATS – the guy in glasses on my right? The guy who kinda looks like my beardless Dad (and kinda was)? That’s the producer Jim Jacks. 20 years ago, Jim Jacks saw CLERKS at Sundance and introduced himself to me at the Fest-ending awards ceremony. We talked [...]



WHEN I WASN’T MASTURBATING IN 2013, I WAS DOING THIS…

Mon, 06 Jan 2014 18:52:33 +0000

Every once in awhile, some prepuce on Twitter will suggest that I’ve become a lazy stoner who doesn’t do anything anymore. I get it: prior to TUSK, I hadn’t made a flick in 3 years. And since the flicks are how most folks came to know me, if there are no new films, I’m not [...]