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rebecca at large

Updated: 2014-10-02T23:43:28.195-05:00


An Interesting E-mail I received - like a Meme


hey, i got an interesting e-mail, that's like a meme. so i'm going to put it here.

instructions are as follows:

...send it back to ME. But FIRST send a blank one out to all your friends, including me, so we can return the favor to you. Be honest. They're really SCARY to get back. It only takes a few minutes, so just do it!

First send (forward) this survey to everyone you know to see how well he or she knows you.

Second, hit 'reply' and fill this survey out about the person who sent it to you and send it back to them.

Where did we meet?________________________
Take a stab at my middle name?________________
Do I smoke?_______________________________
Color of my eyes?__________________________
Do I have any siblings?__________________
What's one of my favorite things to do?__________________
What's my favorite type of music?______________________
Am I shy or outgoing?____________________________
Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules?_______________________
Any special talents?_____________________________
How many children do I have?_________________________
If you and I were stranded on a desert island,
what is one thing that I would bring?_____________________________

I can't wait to see the answers...

Please take a sec and fill out and send back!!

---- and you know what? i got it back from 3 friends so far, and not one of them got my eye color correct ;)

Yep, Another One


got this from mississippi songbird. blame her. i love memes.The rules of the tag:- Pick your birth month.- Bold the 5-10 that best apply to you.- Copy to your own journal, with all twelve months.- Tag people from your friends list.I'm not tagging anyone. You can do it if you like.. no pressure!My birth Month is June so here I go..... (i'm probably bolding more than 5-10)JUNE: Thinks far with vision. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Able to show character. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Brand conscious. Executive. Stubborn.JANUARY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Ambitious and serious. Loves to teach and be taught. Always looking at people’s flaws and weaknesses. Likes to criticize. Hardworking and productive. Smart, neat and organized. Sensitive and has deep thoughts. Knows how to make others happy. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Rather reserved. Highly attentive. Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds. Romantic but has difficulties expressing love. Loves children. Loyal. Has great social abilities yet easily jealous. Very stubborn and money cautious.FEBRUARY: Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizes dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.MARCH: Attractive personality. Sexy. Affectionate. Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Loves to serve others. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Observant and assesses others. Revengeful. Loves to dream and fantasize. Loves traveling. Loves attention. Hasty decisions in choosing partners. Loves home decors. Musically talented. Loves special things. Moody.APRIL: Active and dynamic. Decisive and hasty but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people’s problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Emotional. Aggressive. Hasty. Good memory. Moving. Motivates oneself and others. Sickness usually of the head and chest. Sexy in a way that only their lover can see.MAY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift.JUNE: Thinks far with vision. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Able to show character. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Brand conscious. Executive. Stubborn.JULY: Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficu[...]

I Smelled a llama because I'm a Ninja!


yeah...i'm lazy, so i enjoy blog memes. this is from Mike at Notoriously Nice.

This is funny, don't spoil the fun, and keep it going............Type out the sentence you end up with, in the subject line and forward to your friends...also, send it back to the person that sent it to you.

Pick the month you were born:

January-------I kicked
February------I loved
March--------I karate chopped
April----------I licked
May----------I jumped on
June----------I smelled
July-----------I did the Macarena With
August--------I had lunch with
September----I danced with
October-------I sang to
November-----I yelled at
December-----I ran over

Pick the day (number) you were born on:

1-- -----a birdbath
2-------a monster
3-------a phone
4-------a fork
5-------a snowman
6-------a gangster
7-------my mobile phone
8-------my dog
9-------my best friends' boyfriend
10-------my neighbour
11-------my science teacher
12-------a banana
13-------a fireman
14-------a stuffed animal
15-------a goat
16-------a pickle
17-------your mom
18-------a spoon
19------ - a smurf
20-------a baseball bat
21-------a ninja
22-------Chuck Norris
23-------a noodle
24-------a squirrel
25-------a football player
26-------my sister
27-------my brother
28-------an ipod
29-------a surfer
30-------a llama
31-------A homeless guy

Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
White---------because I'm cool like that
Black---------because that's how I roll.
Pink-----------because I'm crazy.
Red-----------because the voices told me to.
Blue-----------because I'm sexy and I do what I want
Green---------because I think I need some serious help.
Purple---------because I'm AWESOME!
Gray----------because Big Bird said to and he's my leader.
Yellow--------because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars
Orange--------because my family thinks I'm stupid anyway.
Brown---------because I can.
Other----------because I'm a Ninja!
None----------because I can't control myself!

Now type out the sentence you made, in the subject line and forward to your
friends. Don't forget to send it back to the person that sent it to you! I
can't wait to see what you get stuck with.................

it was either i smelled a llama because i'm a ninja or i smelled a llama because i think i need some serious help. LOL either one is funny to me.

this goes to Beanie, BHD, Melanie, Agnes and Mississippi Steph.

or not. have fun.

A Story


i just wrote this to a friend, and instead of rewriting it here...which i don't have the patience or time to right now, i'm copying it (hope you're not insulted, bhd.)years ago, when i was 17, i fell for this guy i knew for years, but didn't know well, as he was a good deal older than me. friends with my friend's brother, who i was very close to. anyway, we saw each other at a party or something and started dating. very innocently. however, he was 24, i was 17. i was just smitten. he was too, for a while. but then, took me for a ride. rejected me, hit on my best friend - trish, then would send me mixed signals...yadda yadda. this went on for a couple years whenever i'd see him (not often) at parties or out at bars. he'd hit on me, we'd make out, i'd forgive, he'd drop me. blah. anyway, last time we saw each other it wasn't pretty. he was a big drinker, big partier, big womanizer, kind of a jerk. but, thanks to him i've got a really great friend in another mutual friend, dinesh....and i also contribute much of my weight gain to the depression that began at the start of his rejection of me, and my broken heart. sleeping yet??several years later, bill ended up marrying this girl from my church who trish and i hated (she actually called trish "trash" to her face once! lord how people change!) and, more years later, went to the seminary. turns out a couple years ago, he comes back to the home town, and now is minister of my church. also my mom's church. also trish's church, and trish's mom's church.i have always wanted to run into him, because i wanted to see how he'd react to seeing me. i have always wanted some kind of acknowledgement of how badly he treated me from him. not an apology, of course, but i wanted to see in his eyes that he remembered how much of a jerk he was to me and how much he'd hurt me over and over (yes i have taken responsibility for my part in that saga...) and i always thought it would be at church, AFTER i'd lost a ton of weight, and felt confident facing him again.turns out on tuesday, when i was at trish's mom's, helping them go through things, pack things for her move, and get things together for goodwill, etc...there was a scheduled visit from bill and the church's wellness advocate, who is a good friend of my mom who i haven't met before. so, i knew i would run into bill, but he didn't know i'd be there. the plan was to say hello, then leave them with trish's mom so they could visit, and we could pack. trish knows how weird this could be, and in the recent past has obviously had to deal with bill on many occasions. she says he's always a little awkward with her, but it isn't ever long interactions, and she doesn't really care, so it is fine. but she knows this is potentially big for me. she was with me through all the tears those years ago. and probably more aware than i am how those things molded part of my personality, and perhaps in how i deal with men to this day. (worth me exploring in more thought another time)so, they show up. i'm in another room, there's all the greeting going on with trish, her aunt, her sister, her mom (of course) and then i walk into the room. trish is introducing everyone, and finally says, as i walk into the room, "and of course you remember becky, bill" and, with a little glimmer of shock, he looks at me, and says "yes - how are you??" we establish that i'm living in buffalo etc. very brief small talk. he's there to comfort helen-jean (trish's mom) and we all quickly turn our attention to her. and immediately, trish, her sister, aunt and i go upstairs to do our thing. i didn't feel weird. i didn't harbor any ill feelings or self-consciousness. but that in itself is weird!bill looks so different. he is thinner (he runs now, and doesn't drink anymore), and has that disease where you lose all your hair (alopecia?) including eyelashes and eyebrows. so he's quite bald. he was a toehead before, and one of the things i remember the most was how soft his lovely straight blonde hair was. and h[...]

Memes Galore!


another MEME!!

i got this from missisippi songbird.

Here it is. Tell 7 random things about myself and then tag 7 more people. I'm going to tag seven. You can do this at your leisure or not do it at all. it's up to you..It's just a little thing to get to know you better..

1.) I once met Brett Michaels from Poison with Pamela Anderson (before she was lee, rock, lee or whomever she's married to now). in college at pitt, i was friends with a girl from mechanicsburg, pa. she went to high school with brett szichek (michaels). my friend trish and i went home with her one thanksgiving holiday (my aunt lived in nearby lancaster) and went out to a bar where all her high school friends hung out. in walks brett michaels and pamela anderson. everyone ignored them except trish and i. we walked over to say hi. they were very, very nice and sweet. we went back to the table where my friend and her friends were, and they threw bar napkins at us with fake autographs like "all the best, jimmy page" and "you're my favorite groupie! love, robert plant" as they tried to make fun of us.

2.) i have gone to the University of Pittsburgh, The Art Institute of Pittsburgh, and Duquesne University. I have about 6 or 7 years of college under my belt. but, due to transferring, and changing majors so many times, i have no degree. sigh.

3.) i lived in Uniontown, PA. yes, gulp, i did. i like to call it the armpit of pennsylvania. horrible place to live. and so close to west virginia (which i'm sure is a lovely state).

4.) i was married once before. (thus, living in uniontown) short marriage. it was one of those times that i was comparing myself to everyone else i knew and was hanging out with at the time. i felt behind. everyone was getting married, or had been married and was having kids...and i had not even a prospect. then i met him, he proposed 2 wks later, and 4 wks later i moved in. we got married in marthas vineyard. seeing marthas vineyard was the best thing about the 3yr union.

5.) i didn't talk to my parents for 2 yrs while living around the corner from them for almost a year. long story short...i wanted to move to chicago and was interviewing for jobs in chicago...and my parents basically told me i was stupid for leaving my current job (one i hated, but i loved the company) and it was the stupidest decision i'd make. unfortunately, the chicago thing didn't work out. but, neither did my relationship with my parents for 2 yrs. mom was treating me like one of her patients (she was a social worker and a therapist.) and i needed a mom. for all you mom's out there - never stop being a mom.

6.) i'm an only child. hated it growing up. always linked myself with friends who had big families. i loved being around big families. now i'm a part of one! married a middle boy out of 6 total kids. so many neices and nephews! i love it. a dream come true.

7.) i've never broken a bone in my body. well, that's not really true. my best friend, trish, while at a gathering when we were in 10th grade, came up behind me and proceeded to knee me in the ass. yup, broken tailbone. she didn't mean to do it, she was actually trying to miss but got too excited or something. LOL. they can't do anything for a broken tailbone at 15. no xrays, nothing. so, my ass hurts sometimes when it rains or is really cold. go figure.

this was a lot harder than i thought! i am feeling quite uninteresting.

oh well. here's who i'm tagging.


if you all don't want to do this, or don't have the time - it's fine. i happen to love memes, and i know not everyone does.

a Meme to come back to.


i need to pay more attention to my blog...but i just haven't had much to say lately, and life has been quite any case, i got this from ali's blog, bhd's blog, and beanie's goes the rules:bold all the statements that are true. My personal commentary will be in italics next to the statements I want to comment on. some legal stuff for the meme. Original source: The list is based on an exercise developed by Will Barratt, Meagan Cahill, Angie Carlen, Minnette Huck, Drew Lurker, Stacy Ploskonka at Illinois State University. The exercise developers ask that if you participate in this blog game, you acknowledge their copyright.If you want to participate, please do the same. And here we go!Father went to college - LafayetteFather finished college - and grad school at Pitt. engineering degree and MBA.Mother went to college - first, nursing school, then later in life, Pitt - psych and art history majorMother finished college - BA in psych, then on to get her grad degree in social work.Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor - Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers Had more than 50 books in your childhood homeHad more than 500 books in your childhood home - Were read children’s books by a parent Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18 - ballet, clarinet, piano, and several different types of art lessonsHad more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively - weird, general statement. hmm.Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18 Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs - not a trustWent to a private high school - Went to summer camp - Summer's Best Two Weeks,every year as a kid from first grade through 6th, affiliated with our church. also continued to be involved in it on the Work Crew and eventually as a counselor. and also away camp for two weeks each summer for 2 yrs in 5th and 6th grade on lake erie.Had a private tutor before you turned 18 Family vacations involved staying at hotels - sometimes. most of the times we had time-shares, or something.Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18 - my mom is a very talented seamstress. when i was a kid, we had matching outfits sometimes! but she made some of my clothes always. even each of my formal and prom dresses.Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them - no, i didn't start driving until i was 25.There was original art in your house when you were a child - yes, we all love art in my familyHad a phone in your room before you turned 18 You and your family lived in a single family houseYour parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home - yes, possibly also before i was born.You had your own room as a child - yes - i was and am an only child.Participated in an SAT/ACT prep course - yes, we were all required to do so in our school.Had your own TV in your room in High School Owned a mutual fund or IRA in High School or College Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16 - florida, georgia, new englandWent on a cruise with your family Went on more than one cruise with your family Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up - yes, often, and to the ballet and symphony and flower conservatories and the aviary.You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family - absolutely unaware._________________________________i look at my answers, and i feel that it paints a weird picture. i was (and am) quite fortunate. and yes, we were upper middle class. i never thought about it, nor did i compare myself to any of my friends - except that we had a smaller house - which makes sense because there were just the 3 of us. we could have been closer, but i never wanted for anything, even love. i certainly was (and am) ble[...]



2 days ago i was at the hospital, again, from 9am to 7pm. blood taken, iv fluids given (including potassium which i was seriously lacking!) another ct scan and more xrays. nothing was found in any of it. that would seem like good news, but it doesn't help explain why i'm so sick and feel so horrible and in pain when i'm conscious.

i made an appointment for next friday for an endoscopy so they can look and see if there's something amiss that they couldn't find in the other snapshots. and, they will blow open my "pouch" (the new stomach) to make it less tight - in hopes that that will make me feel better. i hope it works.

needless to say, i'm not sleeping because i can't get comfortable. pain all over my torso, especially around my ribcage and in between my ribcage where the pouch is. i'm constantly (TMI ALERT!) puking up "foam" (saliva) and it is getting harder and harder to drink water. oh yeah, i haven't had anything in the way of food since last thursday. i could care less about that - but the water thing really bothers me. water is starting to taste bad to me (did you know water had a taste??) i've been drinking aquafina - which used to taste the best to me! and i tried the cold water from the fridge dispenser. that too tasted weird. almost sweet. today i'm drinking evian - and cold, it is ok...but room temp - it isn't. problem is, cold doesn't work for my pouch.

all this has me so don't even know. and there's nothing anyone can do for me. so this is creating stress at home. hubby is very, very stressed out. i keep telling him if i could will this away, i would. and that i'm not doing this TO him. if i could feel better - god, i would in a second. i don't enjoy this.

thank you for all of your well-wishes and prayers. please, please keep them coming.

until then, here's the beeb.


sorry, guys


not into blogging these days.
just not in a good place physically, mentally and spiritually.
writing/blogging about it means facing it.
and i can't do that right now.

doesn't mean i don't care about all of you - i certainly am a reader even though i'm not a blogger/writer right now.

love to you all.

A Year Ago This Week



a year ago today i was on my way to the abacos islands of the bahamas.

in 2 hrs, we'd be at our destination with a lovely tropical drink in hand.

i cannot believe how fast this year went. our 1 yr anniversary will be on october 6. and i feel like it was yesterday.


what celeb?


mine is kenneth branagh, which i am TOTALLY OK with, as i have had a crush on him for years.

meme from melanie


1. Black and White or Color; how do you prefer your movies?
depends on the movie. i still think gone with the wind should have been black and white.

2. What is the one single subject that bores you to near-death?

3. MP3s, CDs, Tapes or Records: what is your favorite medium for prerecorded music? records and cds

4. You are handed one first class trip plane ticket to anywhere in the world and ten million dollars cash. All of this is yours provided that you leave and not tell anyone where you are going ever. This includes family, friends, everyone. Would you take the money and ticket and run?
if i wasn't married, yeah. but no.

5. Seriously, what do you consider the world's most pressing issue now?

6. How would you rectify the world's most pressing issue?
no idea

7. You are given the chance to go back and change one thing in your life; what would that be? i wouldn't have gained so much weight in my 20's.

8. You are given the chance to go back and change one event in world history, what would that be? holocaust

9. A night at the opera, or a night at the Grand Ole' Opry” which do you choose? OPRY!!

10. What is the one great unsolved crime of all time you'd like to solve? which came first, chicken or the egg. ok, i don't really know.

11. One famous author can come to dinner with you. Who would that be, and what would you serve for the meal? john fowles. we'd discuss the magus at length...and maybe the collector. we'd have bacon wrapped scallops with a dipping sauce for an appetizer, caesar salad, london broil, grilled asparagus, crescent rolls, pino grigio and flame brule for dessert. if i went with my second choice - pat conroy, we'd have KFC, or pizza hut dipping pizza :)

12. You discover that John Lennon was right, that there is no hell below us, and above us there is only sky - what's the first immoral thing you might do to celebrate this fact? nothing.

13. If you could be anywhere in the world as you are answering this, where would that be? SeaSpray Resort, Abacos Bahamas.

Nothing New


life still sucks for me right now.

that is all.

Got This From BHD



create your own visited states map
or check out these Google Hacks.

cool. 50%

what price?


what price am i paying to get "healthy" (thinner)?

my psyche is....lost.

i'm tired and nauseas all the time.

i'm starting to wonder (though it is silly to wonder, since i can't go back) if i should have stayed fat and relatively happy, because i'm quite sick and very, very unhappy right now.

i start week 3 post op tomorrow. 5 more weeks, they say, until the switch flips and i feel great again.

until then, i sit here, drink my water, drink my protein, and wait.

this blog suffers


i have such little energy and motivation right now, that i don't know if i can forsee keeping up with 2 blogs.

and right now, this one suffers, because everything is going into the other blog.

so...any of you "regular" readers will have to excuse me. i may have an extended absence on this blog until the focus comes off of Shrinking Me.

Havent Disappeared!!


i'm just healing and haven't felt much like blogging.

miss you all!!!

Meme from AliThinks


1) Who is your favorite country singer? Emmylou Harris or Lyle Lovett. I think Emmylou a bit more.

2) Wait, what were we talking about? uhrm, memes??

3) How do you feel about your neighbors? well, jim and carol to our right are great. older retired couple. they are sweet, funny, keep to themselves, travel a lot, and keep their home immaculately clean and neat. on our left, different story. can't stand them. they're retarded. we call them the clampetts. lots of stories about them. butch and darlene and their daughter jaime who is 15 but has the intellect and maturity of a 5 yr old. literally. sad.

4) Have you ever swum naked? If so, will you tell us about it?
yes i have! at druidlabs east, as a matter of fact! with cathy, and possibly mike. i know we weren't sober. and i know it was at night in the summertime a couple years ago, and it felt lovely.

5) What's your favorite night spot in Pittsburgh? it no longer exists. a place called Rosebud. they had a great atmosphere, menu, live acts - very diverse, cool crowd, great prices. i think i went at least once a weekend while i lived there.

If you'd like to play, ask me to interview you in the comments. Oh, and here are the rules:

Interview rules:
1. Leave me a comment saying “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with a post containing your the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

another blog


i mentioned i'd start another blog tracking my weight loss success story.

i did the bare minimum, and here's the link:

if that doesn't work, it is

i will tweak it and make it better in time. it is a busy day today. just got done taking stella to the vet, saying good bye to my godsend of a mother, who's been with me since the day before my surgery, and making an appointment to see my primary care physician - for what we think is THRUSH. - my mouth/teeth/gum pain.'ll have to deal with the dull blog for now. ;)

talk to you later!



hi again.

everything went well at the dr's appt today. i'm doing great! incisions look good, and i'm progressing to pureed foods (whooopee!!) actually, this is exciting because i'm about sick of just liquids LOL

i found out the pain/discomfort feeling in my right side around/under my ribs is due to the fact that that is where most of the poking in me was done! that's where most of the work was done - through the 2 incisions on my right side. so, she said i could still have gas in there, or my liver could be swollen from being moved around etc. (EEK!) but not to worry.

the weirdest thing, and what is making being awake very irritating right now, is that my soreness of gums and painful teeth has NOTHING to do with my surgery, according to the surgeon. i find that hard to believe, since it's start coincided directly with my surgery.

i feel like my teeth are going to fall out. and in a way, i wish they would if it would make the pain stop.

i'm doing this peroxideish rinsing stuff that i got at the pharmacy - which helps a little, but not for long. this is pissing me off, though.

has anyone else had any weird mouth/teeth/gums pain after surgery??

One Week Later...



i'm feeling lots better already. i have my appointment with my surgeon tomorrow morning to give me the official word on how i'm doing. but, my mom, who has been with me since the surgery, said she is amazed at my progress.

i have been walking around, doing things for myself, getting in all my protein and liquids, resting when i need to, writing down questions for the doc....and i've lost a total of 15 lbs already. feels weird.

my 6 incisions look good and are healing great. the only discomfort i have is right under my ribs on my right side. the doc said that they had a hard time with me because i'm so high/short waisted, so they blew in a lot of gas and had to do a lot of manuevering in there to get done what was needed. my mom thinks my discomfort is just from internal swelling still, not that anything is wrong. but, that's one of the things i'll talk about with the doc tomorrow morning.

i'm excited to hopefully move on from the liquid stage to the pureed foods/soft foods stage. more choices. looking forward to it. we'll see what happens.

i'll check in and let you guys know what i hear from my surgical team tomorrow.

thanks for the support!! :)




but, everything couldn't have gone any better, really.

it was a total clusterfuck - aside from the surgery itself - and i love my surgeon, but the rest of my experience at the hospital was fucking ridiculous and painful. the nurses were horrible and mean. their response time was unreal. i have never in my life had such a bad experience.

the good news is i'm fine. i'm healthy. the surgery was top notch and i'm now home.

awaiting my Darvon for pain and watching my 6 incisions heal. :)

thanks to all of you for your support and encouragement along the way.

it means more than you know.

Waiting Almost Over!


a few updates:

last weekend H and i went to hidden valley, pa to stay at a condo belonging to my mom & dad's best friends. gorgeous place. we just wanted to get away, and we really enjoyed ourselves.

while there, we took a trek to fallingwater. man...i lived near there for 3 yrs and never got to see it. i'm glad i finally went. beautiful, magical place.

we also took a tour of nemacolin woodlands, and where i used to live - the terribly gross town of uniontown, pa. i have to tell you - it was worse than i remembered, and worse than hank imagined. i showed him where i lived - the house still looked ok, same with the yard - well cared for, etc., but no sign of my ex or mojo. they must have been inside or away. let me tell you that we couldn't get out of uniontown quick enough. SUCH a depressing area. makes lackawanna, ny or coraopolis, pa look like resort towns.

it was a lovely getaway, though. i really needed it.

when we returned, this week was all about prepping for my surgery coming up next tuesday!

yes - it is finally time. got the clearance from my primary physician, the results from my EKG, blood & urine work, chest xray etc. everything is perfect. got the go ahead from my surgical team who i saw on tuesday this week. they answered all the questions i had, but i came up with some more that i have to ask before surgery tuesday.

some people having this surgery have been on circulation machines hooked up to their legs to help prevent blood clots. as well, some were sent home with injections to prevent clots as well. neither has been mentioned to me, and i'm a little concerned about it. however, they did tell me i will be wearing special hose on my legs to make sure circulation is good and to prevent clots. nothing about any machinery hooked up to these hose, though. so we'll see.

other than that i feel very prepared and ready. my mom will come on monday afternoon. she and H's mom will accompany him in the waiting room while i have my surgery tuesday morning. my mom will be staying with us for as long as i need help. which, could be anywhere from a week to 3. no way of knowing how quickly i'll be back on my feet. this is different surgery from the lap-band surgery - more invasive and intense, and there are more incisions, though it is all done laproscopically. my mom will be with me most of the day and evening, but she will be sleeping at H's mom's place as she has a guest room and we don't. i'm a bit relieved that this is working out so easily.

i plan on making a new blog - a photo journey of my success in weight loss surgery. so i'll keep you all posted as to that link if and when it happens.

anyway - i may or may not feel like blogging afterwards for a bit, but if you think of it around 7:30 AM EST on tuesday morning, august 7 - say a prayer or send some good vibes/thoughts my way. i will certainly appreciate it more than you know.


Women In Art


i love this. my mom sent it to me. hope you like it, too.

a boring update


so, finally, we have a fence and a cleaned up yard. what should have been a 4 day job took 3+ weeks due to, in my opinion, work ethic. so be it, it's done.

dogs are thrilled, loving life - it is a whole new world out there for them. AND this has almost completely taken care of the housebreaking problem. thank god.

my parents came to town for my birthday for the weekend (june 30) and we had a great time celebrating mine, my father's and my husband's birthdays. last week, H was diagnosed with walking pneumonia. the day after, i was diagnosed with asthmatic bronchitis. H is almost completely healthy. my antibiotics were only for 5 days, and yesterday i was without, and i feel like i'm getting the crud all over again. luckily, the dr called in more antibiotics for me, and the wonderful musinex d, so i hopefully will be on the mend soon. i'm sick of being sick. it is boring and annoying.

i was to start 2 classes this week at the CEPA Gallery in downtown buffalo. monday was the intro to photoshop class, and wednesday (today) the intro to digital point n shoot photography. well. i went to monday night's class. this was supposed to be for beginners. everyone else (6 people) had used photoshop before or currently uses it for work. and, there were no PCs. all Macs. i felt handicapped throughout the class - and so, after much disappointment and talking it over with H - i decided to get my money back from this class. i won't get out of it what i want to, because i'll be asking for help navigating a Mac, while trying to learn photoshop too, and the instructor doesn't have time to handhold me while keeping the other students happy at a faster pace because they know Macs and a bit about the software. i am very sad about this, but i'll get over it. i did look at community colleges and other colleges/universities in the area before i signed up for this class - but noone else was offering intro classes. so i took a chance. oh well. oh, and the intro to point and shoot digital photography class on wednesdays? it is cancelled. i was the only one who signed up for it. :(

so, i will eventually get myself Photoshop, and learn it on my own. i'm also going to try to search again for intro photography classes around. i'd been looking forward to this since march, and had to wait until june for these classes to be scheduled in july. so we'll see how long before i can jump into what i really want to as far as classes like these.

next week i'm going on thursday through sunday to cape cod to visit H's older sister Susan and her daughter and husband. not supposed to have favorites, but of H's siblings, she's the one i like the most, and is the farthest away. this is another reason why i want to get healthy quickly. i don't want to go away feeling like this, and then pass it on. plus, my surgery is coming soon, and i want to be as healthy as possible for that!

picked up a new "hobby" from my mom when she was here. embroidering with beads. it is fun. i'm still getting the hang of it, but it will definitely keep me busy while i'm recouperating from the surgery.

well, that's pretty much all that's going on in my world these days. like i said, boring. snoozefest. what can you do?