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It's All In the Family



Welcome to a family friendly blog that presents popular family issues and provides advice on family conflict. From dramas left behind by ancestors to generational curses, this family blog covers challenging issues. The more you know, the more empowered y



Last Build Date: Sun, 30 Apr 2017 02:04:26 +0000

 



What They Don't Tell You About Mental Illness | Elizabeth Medina | TEDxS...

Sat, 29 Apr 2017 22:21:00 +0000

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The Baggage They Carry - personal problems

Fri, 21 Apr 2017 18:27:00 +0000

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Tips Dating Older Men, Dating Younger Women: Christian Dating: Older Men and Younger Women

Thu, 20 Apr 2017 17:58:00 +0000

Tips Dating Older Men, Dating Younger Women: Christian Dating: Older Men and Younger Women: In the Bible there are men in relationships with younger women.  For example, Boaz and Ruth were one such couple.  Now there is nothing wron...



Family Activities Don't Have to Cost Money Just Your Time

Thu, 20 Apr 2017 02:24:00 +0000

Family Activities Don't Have to Cost Money Just Your Time: Parenting blog for families of multi-age groups - newborns, tweens, and teens. Basic facts on raising children. Tips on shopping for children.



How Parents Secretly Favor One Child Over Another

Wed, 19 Apr 2017 17:32:00 +0000

Parents began favoring one child over another the day when the not-so favored child decided to go against the rules not once, not twice, but as many times as they could to get what they wanted, make a statement, or show parents when their wrong in their judgments.  Controlling adults who become parents don’t take too kindly to this behavior and will punish the child, at times, severely. The hardheaded, stubborn, strong-willed, defiant and many other words used to describe this challenging child was why secretly, parents gave up on the battles with him or her and began to favor the easy-going, obedient, and respectful child.This is a sad truth! As much as parents say they love all their children the same, the reality is they don’t. They love their children differently based on the personality that they have noticed within each of their children. John will receive tough love because he challenges authority and David will receive a gentler love because he doesn’t put up a challenge. As both children become older, tasks are given to them and they are expected to follow instructions and make mom and dad proud. However, the child who prefers to question authority before he completes his task is met with a frown from defeated parents who have grown weary of John’s “smart mouth, mess ups” etc. So he makes a decision not to even do the task – “Why bother, my parents don’t expect me to do it right anyway?” Yet, the favored child completes the task and doesn’t let the parents’ attitude or his sibling’s objections affect what needs to be done. Moments like these are repeated over time, from asking that the room be cleaned to taking out the trash while parents are judging who is more responsible. The more responsible child will ultimately win the prize once they are older whether it be college paid for, a trust fund, property left to them, their grandchildren receiving gifts and a host of other rewards. The already favored child gets an increase of “brownie points,” while the other child is labeled irresponsible and reminded about the past and all the times he or she failed at assigned tasks and didn’t follow parent’s orders. Could it have been the un-favored child just needed a little more instruction, attention or maybe a simple smile from mom or dad that said, “I have faith in you”? Now that the children have become adults, parents are observing each adult child’s behavior more-so, because they know that the kind of adult their child has become will reflect on whether the parents enabled the success or failure of all their children. The favored child has shown a consistent lifestyle with little, if any, fluctuation in it. He or she doesn’t seem to waver too far from mom or dad, they seem to be around to help them in whatever way they can –sometimes without being asked. They aren’t frivolous with their finances and seem to have stable relationships with everyone around them. Yet, the not so favored child is not coming around the parents often. In fact, they may have moved out of the state, against his or her parent’s wishes. He or she doesn’t have many stable relationships and enjoys spending money at times more than what the parents would have done when they were his or her age. The parents see their adult child as irresponsible in their eyes. Is the adult child really irresponsible or just different and the parents don’t like it because they can’t control them? The answer to this question lies with the person going through a similar experience. Nicholl McGuire [...]



Family Holidays & Households

Fri, 14 Apr 2017 18:05:00 +0000

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The Death Angel - Exodus 11- 1-13, 19 - passover, death, signs

Tue, 11 Apr 2017 13:59:00 +0000

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Forced into Doing Something or Else

Thu, 06 Apr 2017 18:36:00 +0000

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Why Your Relative, Friend is Always without Money

Wed, 05 Apr 2017 17:21:00 +0000

Sometimes we have to say no to friends who repeatedly borrow.Your relative or friend isn’t on drugs, at least so you think. He isn’t binging on alcohol or running from the law, you don’t guess. She isn’t wasting money on men and parties, you don’t believe. So why is it that at least once a month your friends are coming up short with cash? Something is very wrong and you intend to find out what is behind the smile and the, “Please I really need your help.”In order to find out why your loved one is always without cash you will have to learn to not only hear what he or she is saying but also pay attention to what he or she is doing. Now if you don’t spend any time with your friend you wouldn’t know what is really going on behind the scenes. If you are not going over to their home or workplace you definitely wouldn’t know. All you can do at this point is take him or her at his or her word. But if you are curious, then why not visit your relative and look around his or her home. Why not, call your friend more often. Why not talk to other family members and other friends of course not gossiping, but listening to what their experience has been like lately with your friend. You will be surprised what is going on behind the scenes and you may even feel burdened to help more or less. When you visit your relative or friend’s home, check for wasteful spending or poor living. Check the cabinets, the freezer, and other places to see if they are buying bulk items or dollar store boxes. Are they buying their childreneverything under the sun or nothing under the moon? What about the expensive hobby or the bottomless home business they boast about, is it sapping what little income they have? Some people don’t usually want to help anyone in the first place, but those that do, don’t bother to ask for details. However, if you are frequently being asked for money most likely you want to know the details, so the relative or friend will stop asking. One thing you could do is listen to this person’s problems from the beginning and take at least a day to think about whether you want to give them $5, $500.00 or $5,000. If they are honest, then his or her story won’t change, but if your loved one isn’t, you will find out soon enough especially if you question more deeply the next time they ask you for money. You could say, “I keep track of where my money goes and what it’s being used for. I need to know exactly what is going on in your life that is keeping you from taking care of your bills. Maybe I could direct you to professionals who could best help you in your situation.” When you say this, you are doing two things: letting your loved one know that you want to help, but you are also warning he or she that you will no longer help.So what is really going on in your relative or friend’s life? Well there could be many things, but we will take on a few possibilities.Taxes, Collection Agencies, LoansAlways consider the timing they are asking you for money. As we all know April is the time when most taxes are due. So if your relative or friend is suddenly hit with unpaid taxes due to lies that have come back to haunt him or her, then most likely he or she didn’t budget for this and will be scrambling around trying to get the money to keep the tax man or woman happy. Collection agencies are also bombarding him or her with requests to pay this bill or that one, he or she may have paid some companies to keep them quiet, but came up short to buy things like groceries.If your relative or friend just started attending college or just graduated then there are expenses and lots of them. You may have been one of the relatives or friends who encouraged him or her to go to college, but little did you know that you will also be one of them who will be he[...]



Let the Matter Drop - arguments, pain, revenge

Wed, 05 Apr 2017 17:00:00 +0000

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1-2 Broken Hearted and Disappointed vs Evil - lust, scandal, deception

Tue, 04 Apr 2017 18:16:00 +0000

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Tell Me Mother You're Sorry - Distant Children - excerpt from book by N. McGuire

Mon, 03 Apr 2017 19:46:00 +0000

In my experience, when I observed and talked with many mothers and daughters on and off the Internet about their family issues, I recognized these women were wishing for things they didn’t receive from their mothers and other relatives in the family like an apology, a promised possession, the truth about the past, and more. For instance, a woman shared she had vague memories of her mother ever hugging her. She described her mother as being “cold” and “mean.” Many spoke about how their mothers didn’t care too much about what they did, where they went, and who they met back when we were in high school. Some shared how their moms expected them to act like mothers to their younger siblings and how much they hated it. I recall one daughter sharing how she didn’t like how her mother would just pick up and move the family every time she broke up with one of her boyfriends. I heard of stories where both daughters and sons were verbally, physically or sexually abused by their mothers and how they had to end up cutting them out of their lives. A few talked about how they didn’t appreciate having to lie for moms while others talked of how they picked up certain bad habits from them. Then there were those that were called many horrible names and treated more like slaves rather than their mothers’ children.From eating disorders to drunkenness, there were far too many things these daughters and sons saw that they didn’t like about their mothers, yet there were those who could clearly see they were repeating patterns. Some issues these grown children faced later in life had been directly connected with their upbringing. Although a number of mothers would acknowledge this fact, there are far more that would simply want their children to sweep issues under the rug, let bye-gones be bye-gones, and move on with life. Easier said for these moms then done for their children. It was obvious that healing needed to take place in these sons and daughters’ lives even if it meant protecting themselves and their families from more of their mothers’ strange behaviors by no longer contacting them.Part of moving on is defining what the family problems are, and then beginning a process that emotionally and physically frees sons and daughters from their toxic mothers’ mental and physical games. Running from mom, lying about or to mom, ignoring her reactions, covering for her with others you know she has wronged, cursing at her, or acting as if there is no elephant in the room, does nothing more than feed the negative roots that steadily grow within family relationships. A daughter or son who never felt his or her mother validated him or her emotionally, physically or spiritually will lash out. This is why some will seek a third party to help resolve problems. For some, these children were nothing more than décor in the home to be seen and not heard. They were to look beautiful, sit still, and don’t cause a disturbance. Other daughters and sons were treated like footstools; moms took their burdens and placed them on their children. Then there were those that were treated like trash bins, when Mom had useless junk, problems, mood swings, and whatever else she couldn’t take out to the dumpster, her daughters and sons were there to collect it all!So in this book, you will be reminded of many good, bad and ugly things concerning your mother or someone else’s, but the focus is to heal from the past while trying not to perpetuate the emotional and/or physical abuse you endured onto others. Various troubled individuals never reached a place of freedom in their lives where they ever received Mama’s apology, affection, or anything that would make them feel that their mothers acknowledged[...]



When the Rich Man Complains - Yet Gives Little, Takes Alot

Mon, 20 Mar 2017 20:00:00 +0000

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Wedding, Worries, Women Woes

Sat, 18 Mar 2017 21:32:00 +0000

 His family.His need for a boy.His job.His money.His time.His TV.His suggestion where we should live.His car.His ring.His hobbies.His friends.His investments.His exes.His children. Where do I fit in?  Socially Sweet, Privately Cruel Abusive Menby Nicholl McGuire[...]



When You Think God Didn't Work it Out for My Good - youtube nmenterprise7

Fri, 17 Mar 2017 18:31:00 +0000

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Are You Wearing Yourself Out? - stress, work, school, family

Thu, 16 Mar 2017 19:34:00 +0000

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Do You Really Need More - Be Careful What You Pray For

Thu, 16 Mar 2017 19:15:00 +0000

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Psalm 86 - Message for those in pain, suffering - prayers

Tue, 14 Mar 2017 09:22:00 +0000

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10 Shocking Cases of Family Relationships

Sat, 11 Mar 2017 08:14:00 +0000

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What Kind of Spouse Will Your Son, Daughter Make - parents, parenting

Sat, 11 Mar 2017 06:34:00 +0000

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Bumping into the Narcissistic Mother, NLP Evil, inner child, misandry ar...

Fri, 10 Mar 2017 15:02:00 +0000

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1-2 What are You Willing to Give Up to Get What You Want?

Sat, 04 Mar 2017 06:50:00 +0000

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Tell Me Mother You're Sorry - book about dysfunctional mothers - excerpt by Nicholl McGuire

Fri, 24 Feb 2017 16:32:00 +0000

One day you noticed the self-absorbed mother trying to be helpful, yet meanly criticizing, joking, playing, or doing something else that makes you feel awkward. She is coming into your room without knocking whether clothed or not. You found yourself having to keep insisting on your independence and protecting those you love because something isn't quite right with your mother. When she feels like you are “sassing” or “think you are so grown and never too old to get you’re a$$ whipped,” she tries to put you in your place. Now if you were to say something she doesn’t like, or do something that goes against her wishes, this kind of mom will try to humiliate you around witnesses. A slap across the face, a name-call over the phone, or a nasty remark about your husband or children and before long you are ready to do battle. Fall into that trap and she will make sure she appears like she was in the right while telling others, “You see how your sister reacted to me! Look at how your niece acts! See why I don’t bother with these young people!” Yet, this mother started the mess, but it doesn't matter to onlookers. You were at fault because you fed into the drama. familyarticlesbynicholl.BlogSpot.comSome of you readers will be the first to admit that at times you gave your mothers a hard time. You weren’t always honest, didn’t always do what you were told, and might have done the unspeakable because you were mad at Mom. I get it, I’m not judging. So where might some of that have come from? Think about it. Mom was sneaky, lying, and covering up some things too even if she wanted you to believe she was a perfect child, always listened to parents, and could do no wrong in her youth and up to now.If you witnessed any mother-like figure's deceitful ways, you learned from the best. As long as you are on Team Mom and have trained your children to be on Team Grandma, then you are okay as long as everyone follows the rules. But you know that God has given us our own minds, a free will. We can choose to follow unrighteous precepts or live in peace doing our best to love and respect others whether near or far. No one should be bullied into doing something they don’t want to do!A child of God, comfortable with his or her sense of self and identity, will break wicked programming from a mentally disturbed mother that has a long history of controlling her children using things like: bible studies and church attendance, strict fathers and relatives to scare them into submission, money and gifts, and emotional, sexual and physical abuse. Many adults suffer with self-esteem issues as a result and have trouble making challenging decisions because they still rely very much on their childhood caretakers that refuse to let them grow up. Tell Me Mother You're Sorry by Nicholl McGuireSome of you readers will be the first to admit that at times you gave your mothers a hard time. You weren’t always honest, didn’t always do what you were told, and might have done the unspeakable because you were mad at Mom. I get it, I’m not judging. So where might some of that have come from? Think about it. Mom was sneaky, lying, and covering up some things too even if she wanted you to believe she was a perfect child, always listened to parents, and could do no wrong in her youth and up to now.If you witnessed any mother-like figure's deceitful ways, you learned fr[...]