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My diary

Updated: 2018-03-05T15:25:22.496-08:00




Read a story about a great ancient Greek philosophers.

The story told people to give space, time with the ones you love. If the person does not love you anymore, leave that person, for the sake of your love. The person would not love you anymore just because you cannot generate the happiness and love among you two anymore; thus leaving him/her alone will be the best option.

I just cannot accept it.



I have had days that I look more peaceful.

I am not actually happy. The tears, remain in my heart...



I have a female friend, whom I met when I was doing my Matriculation in my country. That friend of mine was in the same class with me, that I often talked a lot about various things with her. One day, I told her that I got interested in one of the girls. That friend of mine openly asked me to approach that dream girl of mine, and suggested me to actually build a relationship with that girl as she quoted "that will make you understand girl better".

With advices from my friend, that girl became very close with me and we got together after some time. I was made to understand that special feeling of humanity, the feeling of wanting to get along with someone for so long, so long..

Now that I suddenly recall what that friend of mine said "understand girl better"... I think I do understand it a little better now, or not..Notwithstanding that, the clearest thing I can see now is within myself...How I myself feel now, where my heart lies now...



I really like it when I'm with you. I hope the drama never ends.



I had always been a happy person.

I read a rather not-as-intriguing statement on newspaper today, which actually stimulated a ripple in my heart. The quote is as below

"Happiness is simple, it can be due to a simple meal or an exciting meal; a nice view or a simple view; a simple life or an exciting life'.

I had been enjoying a very simple but yet happy life. There were days that I had no much money, but I enjoyed the process of being very economic with you; we had days with very heavy works that little sleep was gained nightly, but I was glad that I passed those days with you; We had very exciting days hanging out in unexplored areas in different continent, I was fortunate to have you together in the adventure; We had days that we went for routine life, I was happy that I had a partner to share those life.

I wish, I pray, that I can be having those days that we both are together, innocent, strongly-bonded, peaceful, blissful and happy.



I feel uncomfortable, depressed, puzzled and clueless, of what I shall be doing.

I feel voidness, empty. I need guidance. I need help. I do not know how to vent that emotion of mine.



Nowadays I often think about those days that we shared with each other

It was in 2005, a winter night, you said that you missed that traditional food back in our country..

It was of fortune that it was not my duty to make cooking that day. I just went out from our house, ran from our house to the city center, attempting to look around if there was a place that I could get hold of that food. I went to Elizabeth, King, Queen, William, turned back to Bourke and Little Bourke then finally back to Lygon.

There was a authentic restaurant of our country in Lygon that we never had meals there before. With a hunch, I snapped open the classy door of the shop and went in. I saw the waiter and told him exactly what I needed there. With much luck, this food is sold here and I manage to get some of them cooked (as the food is not ready by that time yet). The manager of the shop (who was of same kampung with me) had a chat with me. I told him the food is to be brought back to you, someone that was really important in my life. The manager patted on my shoulder and wished me luck. I smiled.

With the food, just like a game character who fulfilled his quest and got the item to continue withe story flow, I ran back to our house jovially. I arrived in time. Everyone was ready for dinner at the table. I placed that food on the table to be shared with you, and everyone. But we knew, you did not have that food. I was heart broken, even more when someone asked me for details with that food.

The drive that I had for doing that, was solely that was for you. Even now, I still would be doing that, running across streets just like how I was many years ago






伤 ;悲


曾几何时听说过,当伤心超越一个阶段过后,伤心将逝去。取而代之地,是冷漠及灰暗,如在无间的世界里, 这就是悲。

刚刚在msn 里,朋友鼓励:"dun worry, be happy !",
我答 : "sure, life will always go on !".

我想, 我开始找到出口了吧.



改自. 庄周




墨大考试期间在图书馆里的没日没夜, union house里的恶劣食物,assignment时的不眠不休,等result时的极度焦虑, 一路就这样3年下来了。这几天想想,数年来,在lecture theatre里,在Baillieu, 在tutorialroom里,每天总会见到很多熟悉而又从来不打招呼的面孔,彼此知道对方,却因为没有交集,却因为没有话题,甚至因为彼此都不愿意张开口打上那第一声招呼,就这样一直只是熟悉而陌生地互相经过。天南地北的从不同的地方来到这个学校里,VCE, 转学,考IELTS,foundation,不同方式好不容易的来到这个学校里,就这样熟悉又陌生互相经过了3年。问了一下自己,会不会以后很久之后回想起来,觉得很可惜呢?这么大张地图上面,这么不同的人,聚到了这么一块巴掌大的校园里,居然却连声招呼都没有打就又天南地北的散开?就这样让大学生涯收了尾,有遗憾,太潦草!






“你以为你丫出国就了不起了?” 出国的人,没有什么了不起的,真的,出来有段年头的我也没有觉得出国有什么了不起的。 但是,出国以后,我们每个人都很了不起。如此说是因为,我们有着其他人不能体会的辛酸苦辣,也看过和经过太多气愤无奈。可是从来不愿说起,并不等于我们没有故事,恰恰相反的是我们的故事太多,已经不再为此大惊小怪,或者应该说,我们没有时间也没有精力再去想如何诉说了。外国人不论是自己向往,还是因为其他的原因来到国外,从到了异国他乡的第一步,我们就有了一个共同的名字,外国人。外国人,顾名思义就是外面国家的人,一个本不属于本国的人,外面的永远和里面的有着所谓的区别。本国人口头上是很注意回避用“差别”这个词来形容这种所谓的区别,回避使用带有优劣色彩的词汇,然而这又能如何?实际生活中,赤裸露骨的差别何处不在?租房子,进学校,找工作,就连消费都包括在内。外国人这个名字,随时提醒着我们这里不是家,所以不要幻想平等,不要奢望同情,最后能帮自己的只有自己,要渐渐学会自己疼爱自己。扭曲的心不得不承认我们的心是被扭曲的,至少不是正常的,我们生存在一个本来不正常的环境里面。从踏入别人的国门,我们就要学着精打细算,学着兢兢业业,学着洁身自好,学着面对油盐酱醋,面对锅碗瓢盆,面对人间冷暖。摔倒了爬起来,明白了懂事了。摔多了,习惯了,坚强了,也孤僻了。大事小事都要靠自己,所以我们越来越坚强,坚强的不习惯别人的关心;时时刻刻都要保护自己,所以我们越来越自恋,自恋的忘记了还要关心别人。我们的浮躁,我们的自私,逆流而上,让我们孤僻的美丽可怜。这不是歇斯底里,一夜之间自己曾所熟悉的拥有的都消失不见,取而代之的是另一个和自己格格不入的世界,谁又会笑得很舒心?天堂不在国外国外不是天堂,即便说给出来旅游的人们,也不会相信,反而换来的将是一句不知好歹。我们不是来旅游的,我们都明白接着要在国外走过的这几个灰色春夏秋冬将要如何坚强面对,这里没有天使,也不是天堂,至少对于我们这群被称作外国人的群体来说,这里绝对不是天堂。就连我们自己在明白的时候,也已经是在国外翻打许久以后了。时间国外的时间流逝的很快,一天分三十六个小时来用都不够,因为我们要花太多的时间精力在一些曾经觉得微不足道的小事情。洗衣扫地,烧水做饭,缝缝补补,我们的理想不算伟大,只期望偶尔某个早上能偷偷的睡个懒觉。夜里打工回来,总会是比较兴奋的,即便是自己想要去睡觉,也睡不着。身体很累想要睡去,精神却还在折腾。于是每天上床睡觉的时候,才发现又预支了第二天好几个小时。网络上网侵蚀了我们每天很多时间,这仿佛听起来对于喊着没有时间的我们,很难自圆其说。那是我们仅存的一点侥幸心理在作祟,让在不经意中还渴望有人和自己一样,在地球的某个角落发送着SOS或者渴望着回音。于是我们挥霍着宝贵的睡眠时间,游荡在一个不存在的感情世界里。或许网络里面的我们,才是真实的,因为这里让我们感到安心,这里没有天堂没有地狱,没有国界。在假的世界里有着真的我们,暂时逃避开真的世界里面那个假的自己。朋友对于在外面的我们来说,有两群朋友,国内和国外的。每次回国,封印的记忆被打开,见到国内朋友是一件多么幸福的事情。只是随着在两个不同环境成长的我们和他们之间,共同语言越来越少,当自己满怀激情的要把经历和感受说给他们的时候,反而让朋友们感到莫名其妙,虽然每次朋友都会微笑点头,但是直觉告诉自己,他们不会懂,就像自己很难理解朋友们的许多想法一样。在国外的朋友就不同了。经历相同的事情,接触相同的时间,共同语言就会多许多,然而离的越近,摩擦面也就越大,好在虽然时不时吵到面红耳赤,几个小时以后,大家又都会回到不分你我,因为心里都明白,处一个朋友是如何宝贵的,快乐是因为两个人的快乐,悲伤是因为两个人的悲伤。蝙蝠不会和鸟儿飞翔,也不同于兽类的习性,能和它为伍的只有和自己一样的蝙蝠。恋爱国外的爱情,来的太快,走的更快。这里没有亲情,缺少友情,爱情的成分就自然膨胀。脆弱的人把爱情当作良药,坚强的人把爱情当作游戏。这里的爱情就像被饲养的肉食鸡一样,有了目的的成长只是一个简单的程序,几天就可以养肥一只白白胖胖的鸡,几天也可以培养一份看似亲密无间的爱情。结果,和肉食鸡干燥无味的肉质一样,催化起来的爱情也是难以下咽。想家像父母,但是不懂得如何能确切表达。即便在国外学了许多语言,却发现自己的表达能力越来越差。“慈母手中线,游子身上衣”这里面的分量,心里明白,也想说,说不出来。想家的感觉很美,就像圆月的深夜,想要沉浸在这个美丽中,却有冷风时时提醒自己,这是外国的月亮。家,对我们来说,是藏在心里最暖的一个寄托,不敢打开这个盒子,一旦打开,眼泪就会有流下来。然而,外国不需要我们的眼泪,只需要我们汗水。亲情也自然就成了一个被禁忌的话题,成了扭着心头的痛。结我们需要的不是同情,而是认可。我们在国外,努力过,成功过,相信过,期望过,欣慰过,失败过,猜疑过,伤心过,失望过,愤怒过,高兴过,糊涂过,领悟过,张扬过,虚伪过,坦诚过,兴奋过,平淡过,堕落过,发奋过,认真过,马虎过,悲哀过,同情过,怜悯过,无奈过,争取过,承受过,美丽过,丑陋过,施舍过,得到过,想念过,忘记过,珍惜过,遗失过,挣扎过,痛苦过,精明过,疯狂过,傻过,哭过,笑过,忧过,愁过,真心恨过,更真心爱过。有血有肉的我们在国外曾经走过。

所以 我们有资格说我们骄傲,因为我们在国外

冷笑话全集 (天气炎热时看就是爽啊!总有一个能把你给冻起来的)




3.大灰狼对小羊说:“我要吃了你!!!” 你们猜,怎么了?结果大灰狼就把小羊吃了.

4.石头和年糕打架,石头飞起一脚就把年糕踢进了大海…………从前有一对恋人私定终生,但是男生需要服兵役,便和女生定下誓言,给了女生一枚钻石戒,并许诺在三年后的今天与那女生碰面,到时候,那枚戒指作为婚戒. 好不容易3年过去了,女生一直在等男生,却一直等不到,她伤心过度,绝望的她把钻戒扔入大海,远走他乡.可是,那男生其实也一直在等那女孩,可是,女孩误解了约会地点,于是便永远的成为了遗憾.男生伤心欲绝…过了几年,男生出外钓鱼,猜猜看他钓到了什么?年糕!!!

5.水饺是男生还是女生答案 男生 因为水饺有包皮



8. 從前從前有一隻鳥他每天都會經過一片玉米田但是很不幸的有一天那片玉米田發生了火災所有的玉米都變成了爆米花小鳥飛過去以後……以為下雪,就冷死了…


10. 阿松和阿柏无事闲聊互道岁月不饶人。阿松:“回忆儿童时代,过的最快乐的是儿童节。”阿柏:“过了十年就是青年节。”阿松:“再过十年就是父亲节。”阿柏:“再过几十年就是老人节了。”阿松:“又再过几十年.”阿柏:“清明节。”

11. 众士兵:“渴……渴……”曹操:“大家再坚持一会!我曾经到过这个地方,记得附近有一座梅林,再走一会可能就到了”众士兵:“噢 ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄有梅子吃呀 ̄ ̄ ̄噢 ̄ ̄ ̄”半个时辰后——曹仁:“主公!探险队找到了大量的水源!”曹操:“哈哈哈哈,大家听到了吗?终于有水喝啦”众士兵:“不去……一定要找到梅子……”




15. 提问:怎样使麻雀安静下来?回答:压它一下。原因:鸦雀无声(压雀无声)。