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Joke of the Day : Joke Diary



Joke of the Day For Everybody



Last Build Date: Sun, 05 May 2013 07:38:27 +0000

 



Life B.C. (Before Computers)

Thu, 20 Sep 2012 07:30:14 +0000

A little girl was watching her mother prepare a fish for dinner. Her mother cut the head and tail off the fish and then placed it into a baking pan. The little girl asked her mother why she cut the head and tail off the fish. Her mother thought for a while and then said, […]



The Dream Genie

Wed, 19 Sep 2012 07:15:07 +0000

A modern day cowboy has spent many days crossing the desert without water. His horse has already died of thirst. He’s crawling through the sand, certain that he has breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden, he sees an object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him. He crawls to […]



For The Ladies

Tue, 18 Sep 2012 07:09:30 +0000

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweat-shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, “What setting do I use on the washing machine?” “It depends,” I replied. “What does it say on your shirt?” He yelled back, “University of Oklahoma.” And they say blondes are dumb… ———————————————————– […]



Through A Child’s Eyes

Mon, 17 Sep 2012 07:02:01 +0000

NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, “Mom! That lady isn’t wearing a seat belt!” HONESTY […]



I Wonder

Sun, 16 Sep 2012 06:58:45 +0000

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are going dead? Why do banks charge a fee on ‘insufficient funds’ when they know there is not enough money? Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is […]



The 12 Pains of Christmas

Sat, 15 Sep 2012 06:52:50 +0000

Chorus : The first thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me: Is finding a Christmas tree. The second thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me: Husband (2): Rigging up the lights, C: And finding a Christmas tree. The third thing at Christmas that’s such a pain to me: Inebreated man (3): […]



The ABCs of Aging

Fri, 14 Sep 2012 06:48:55 +0000

A’s for arthritis; B’s the bad back, C’s the chest pains, perhaps car-d-iac? D is for dental decay and decline, E is for eyesight, can’t read that top line! F is for fissures and fluid retention, G is for gas which I’d rather not mention. H is high blood pressure–I’d rather it low; I is […]



Man-guage

Thu, 13 Sep 2012 09:53:49 +0000

A guide to man language “I’M GOING FISHING” Means: “I’m going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.” “IT’S A GUY THING” Means: “There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at […]



A Gorilla Walks Into A Bar

Wed, 12 Sep 2012 09:34:44 +0000

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a martini to the amazement of the bartender. When the bartender gives the gorilla the martini, he’s further surprised to see that the ape is holding a $20 bill. The bartender takes the $20, then he decides to see just how smart the gorilla is, so he […]



Marriage

Tue, 11 Sep 2012 08:49:33 +0000

1) Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence (a life sentence). 2) Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are still attached. 3) Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore marriage is an institution for the blind. 4) Marriage is an institution in which a […]