Subscribe: Circle. Square. Triangle.
http://shapesandshadows.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default
Added By: Feedage Forager Feedage Grade B rated
Language: English
Tags:
alexa  back  band  blog  don  girl  good  hot  live  love  make  man  much  music  new  people  shit  show  time  week 
Rate this Feed
Rate this feedRate this feedRate this feedRate this feedRate this feed
Rate this feed 1 starRate this feed 2 starRate this feed 3 starRate this feed 4 starRate this feed 5 star

Comments (0)

Feed Details and Statistics Feed Statistics
Preview: Circle. Square. Triangle.

Circle. Square. Triangle.





Updated: 2015-09-16T20:08:18.244+01:00

 



I'm wigging out...

2008-12-11T12:06:43.849+00:00

I will use this less and less for pervert-picture-posting and more like a private on-line journal so this will disappear from your eyes soon I reckon'...

I still haven't booked my flight to Canada yet.
After talking about doing it for 3 years, I'm finally moving in March/April.
Fair play to my mates for tolerating listening to me talk about it for so long.
My visa came through yesterday so I'm pretty chuffed to say the least.

I've just turned 23 and have been working in music for 5 years.
I've had enough basically.

Currently in London for a week or so.
I slept in on Saturday morning and woke up at 7am - my flight was already in the air at that time. Dang.
Cost me 100 bills for a flight the next day. That was scheduled to leave at 8am and wouldn't you know it, I awoke at 7am. If I hadn't have online checked-in then I would have missed two flights in a row..........in 24 hours.
What the fuck is wrong with me sometimes?

I've only smoked like 6 ciggies in 5 days or something.
My body aches from doing too many stomach crunches the past month.
I've been hitting on one of my best friend's (Nikki) a lot lately.
She has been with her boy about 2 years or something and lives with him but none of this seems to have any relevance with me.
Does this make me a little shit?
I'm only doing it because she is indulging in it and is very much reciprocating.

I'm through with caring at this stage.



I would. You would. Hell, we all would...

2008-11-13T19:39:47.506+00:00

Pitchfork had a post about the Handsome Furs earlier today...
There was nothing enticing or exciting about the post other than the picture which came with it...

(image)

It's been a long time since I shared a lustful picture of a Canadian girl I fancy the arse off...
Unfortunately, there is no other amateur-porn(ish) pictures of Alexei Perry anywhere else on the net...
So here is another one that I like...
If only that skinny fucker wasn't hanging out of her in it, it'd be almost perfect.

(image)

I'll still go see Dan & co. in ALT in a couple of weeks though.
For realz...



Ehhhh...

2008-11-10T17:24:21.764+00:00

Bless me blog, for I have sinned...
It's been like 10 months since my last post and these are my sins...

I have no idea why I have even started writing on this again...
I think I am in a slump - this city is knocking the shit out of me on a daily basis...
For the past while, I was such a miserable little bollox...
But when I turned 23 last week - I felt incredible...
I do believe that 23 might just be the spiritual age I was after...
Now I just need to find my spiritual home where I get to fuck my spiritual girl and I'll be all set...

But, for all the lovely spiritualness going on in my weird little head, I'm still feeling a bit odd...
I've just spent the past few minutes trying to convince my friend Katy that she should get my name tattooed around her right nipple...

By the way, new Animal Collective record came into the office today and it is fucking awesome!

Peace out yo'!



Jaguar Love

2008-02-26T18:42:04.052+00:00

No, I am not back blogging...
I am not suited to that game anymore...
The blog was becoming tedious and somewhat wanton...
Besides, I was looking more and more like a pervert...
Which I like to hide from most people until they get to know me...
Then I unleash the hardcore pervert from within...
It's a delicate act which I have mastered...

Anyway. This post is just to inform you that a supergroup (I hate that term) to end all supergroups (ouch) has formed...
Jaguar Love is going to be the greatest band to come out of the States since Pretty Girls Make Graves & The Blood Brothers...
Ironically enough, this three-piece is made up of ex-member from both sets of bands.
Johnny Whitney and Cody Votolato from The Blood Brothers & Jason Clark from Pretty Girls Make Graves.
Everyone's favourite Indie Matador Records snapped them up and will be releasing their debut album...
2 demo songs have re-appeared on their Myspace and they rock so hard...
Expect the debut to fall this Summer...

Most people will describe it as arty/punky/hardcore etc...
I'd say it's more like music to fuck to...

Marvin Gaye is music to make love to (or so they say)...
Jaguar Love is music to fuck hardcore to (or so I say)...

Jaguar Love's Muthafuken Myspace Profile...



Indefinite-Hiatus...

2008-02-11T17:00:44.243+00:00

Too busy...
No more time for blogging...
I bid thee farewell...

(image)



Cry Me A River...

2008-02-11T08:36:41.044+00:00

France beat us...
City destroyed us...
And Delaney has still not been shot dead at FAI HQ...

This is how I feel after the weekend's depressing festivities...

(image)



Fuck Buddies...?

2008-02-08T16:40:49.587+00:00

What will happen this weekend:

Manchester City fans disrespect the minute silence for the Munich Air Disaster anniversary...

The new Halfset album will be on repeat because it is THAT good. Dramanalog who? (Only Irish people will know what I am on about here - I'll try and stop alienating)...

I'll pull the finger out and finish about 4 songs I have been working on for too long now...

Eastern Promises will be watched constantly again and again because I saw it for the first time last night and it is grrreat. Aragorn for the Oscar...!

Sunday morning will consist of a coffee, the Observer & endless hours of E4 fun - i.e. Gawking at Alexa Chung...

___________________________________________________________________________________________
What wont happen this weekend:

Ireland will give a lesson in Rugby to the "Cheese eating surrender Monkeys" otherwise known as France...

I will buy a new camera, go for a long cycle and take lots of incredibly pretentious/abstract pictures which I'll show off on here come Monday...

She will actually return my love for her...

My music and I will actually agree with one another, ergo - I will feel the need to share some MP3s with you folk...

I will wake up Saturday & Sunday morning with Alexa lying next to me...


Fuck my "no sleaze" policy...
It is flawed and corrupt & I just can't help it...

Three servings of Alexa for your lead us into the weekend pleasure...

(image)

(image)

(image)

P.S. This blog might go through a name-change.
ilovealexa.blogspot.com
;)



Things are going to CHANGE...!

2008-02-07T12:05:31.813+00:00

(image)

I hate how lazy folk can get when it comes to music...
I know very few people who take the initiative and go searching for new artists themselves...
A friend of mine said this to me yesterday:

"Signing is so passé, 20th century thinking, Majors are starting to sink,
its all about Independence now, bring on the Free State....
"

That sentence struck a mighty chord with me (apologies for the musical cliché)...

There is so many artists out their who don't have a label or who are signed to a tiny DIY label run by one person from their bedroom...
This (for me) is what music is about...
Dedication on a small scale run by die-hard fans and enthusiasts...
Unfortunately though, at the minute music is full of tired legs...

With this all falling out of my brain right now because it has been going on for far too long...
I will soon start to post about bands you (hopefully) do not know...
And who you can support by going to a show...
Buying a tee-shirt...
Purchasing a hand-made 7"...
Or even just dropping them a mail on their website/myspace and telling them that you like their music...

I don't want this to come across as being biblical but we live in a time and an age where we can be and do anything we want...
So why are we constantly being negative about how music is run...?
Why don't we take the initiative and start changing things ourselves?
It doesn't cost a lot of money to get 100 7" vinyls pressed...
Why not approach an unsigned artist whom you like and offer to release a single for them?

All of the best ideas start off small...

Take your ideas and just go with them...



I am a changed man...

2008-02-05T21:30:55.388+00:00

I hate it when blogs I enjoy reading don't post new entries regularly (like everyday)...Although I despise blogs who post 10 times a day (their content is usually weak and plagiarised from some other blog/site)...I combine both of the above.I don't blog everyday, but when I do - it's usually short, perverted and full of nonsense (Alexa anyone?)...I'm going to try and clean up my act though, as if I am ever lucky enough to meet Alexa or Shannyn, how the hell can I justify the reasoning behind my posting pictures of them on the internet for all to see?They wont like it one bit and the charming reassuring Irish accent (which is usually a shoe-in) wont mean shit to them.Once the Irish accent card is gone, then all that's left is me and my personality, and we all know that's no banker...:sSo, with all of the above in mind - I am going to try and blog in a very civilised fashion...I really do think buying this bicycle was the best purchase ever. In the entire world. EVER.Skateboarding is more fun, but I run the risk of getting beat up by scumbags if I go out on my deck because I look like a sk8er-boi and NOBODY likes Avril Lavigne (especially not scumbags). Usually about here, I would make a crude comment about Avril Lavigne and how hot she is, but I'm not going to do that today.At least on my bike, I pedal like a motherfucker so I'm too fast to be chased by any delinquent. Which bodes well for me because I can be a total shit to anyone in Burberry within shouting distance and they'll never catch me. Huzzah.I'm listening to Dev "Lightspeed Champion" Hynes a lot at the moment. He deserves our utmost respect. This blog is after-all named after his previous bands' amazing single (everyone should be aware by now that I am a strong believer in the Church of Test Icicles). But his debut solo record is quite something. Nothing like TI, but is still pretty siiick. I'm looking forward to his gig in April in Crawdaddy, not only to see this album performed live, but also because I can heckle by repeatedly requesting him to play Circle Square Triangle all night. Yes, I'll be the loser thrown out by security half-way through the set.My friends and I always play the "what CD in your collection are you ashamed of" game. Usually I always win because the entire group (this can sometimes be up to 12 people) collectively agree that I have too many CDs I should be ashamed of. I'm not embarrassed by any of them though - although I don't think I would ever be able to bring myself to listen to them in front of real people, with my shit hair-cut and "emo" piercings, I wouldn't last a second. Even hiding behind this blog, I can't bring myself to tell strangers over the internet some of these CDs. And if you can't talk to strange internet people then something is seriously wrong (either that or you just don't want people knowing that you own 3 Limp Bizkit albums or 3 Lostprophet records). Fuck, that was a typo. I swear. I really meant to type The Beatles or Led Zep or Jimi Hendrix or any other too-cool-for-school bullshit.1 very quick thing before I split...Fresh Cherries From Yakima, my boy Doug is playing his first ever live show tonight so I want to wish him the very best of luck. You'll be awesome dude, I want to see videos on youtube tomorrow man!Now that I'm a changed man (for tonight at least) how do I end this entry if I am not allowed to post a picture of Alexa?Well, we mentioned it above, and for nostalgia reasons (amongst others because you definitely would)...Avril Lavigne - Sk8er Boi[...]



Sooper Dooooper Toooosday!!!

2008-02-05T11:34:13.431+00:00

(image)



Too Obsessed? Never!

2008-02-04T13:05:15.209+00:00

Eddie has to walk. We were awful on Saturday. And with Darcy out for the rest of the Six Nations, it's safe to say we are fucked. The Welsh match was brilliant though. James Hook was awesome, he didn't miss one kick and he always found touch. And the French?! The less said about that performance the better, because they are going to punish us next week.

Arctic Monkeys. Legends. I have been listening to them all weekend and you-tubing the fuck out of their videos. I have always been a massive fan but I am slowly but surely turning into an obsessive one. Alex Turner is not content with being in the biggest band on the planet, the selfish little fuck only goes and bags himself the best piece of ass on the planet too! Alexa Chung is scarily attractive. Expect to read a lot more about her from here on out because she deserves at least one post a day on this blog for being hot-as-fuck.

Speaking of Alexa, I sat through an hour of complete and utter E4 bullshit on Sunday morning. It was a special on the outrageously rubbish Nick Cage movie National Treasure: Book of Secrets. The only reason I sat through it was to see the little 2 minute segments of Alexa every-so-often on the screen. Yes, it has become that obsessive. Although while watching it, I also realised I have a slight crush on someone who I probably shouldn't. Take a bow Helen Mirren.

How was Andy Johnson's goal disallowed? I don't understand the off-side rule anymore. The linesman got that horribly wrong. And everyone (apart from the scummy Liverpool fans) want to see Everton do well and take 4th place, so they need these points. Staying on the subject of football, the Observer's centre spread piece on Ronaldo was great. His frantics off the pitch are as colourful as his performances on it. Hookers every night. Them selling their stories to the press saying he was an arrogant cock. It kinda makes you wonder if it's like the scenes in American Psycho (the movie) when Bateman is looking at his own body when he is fucking the escorts. Or when one of them moves on the bed when they are sleeping and he tells her not to touch his watch. These stories are strikingly similar to one other Trafford Legend, Sir George Best.

The Observer Sport Monthly gave Brian Ashton manager of the month. Bet they wish they hadn't already gone to print when the English game finished on Saturday evening. The OSM introduced me to Torah Bright also. She is this hot 21 year old Australian snowboarder who has ignited my interest in snowboarding. ;) So yeah, I was quite impressed with the Observer on Sunday, especially the feature with everyone's favourite bad motherfucker Jack Nicholson.



Happy Birthday Zoe...
xx


P.S. Go Giants!!!!
(image)



Get out of here January...

2008-02-05T11:35:04.324+00:00

Just rounding up some nonsense stories to kill of this week...

So Owen Pallett (Final Fantasy) will be making an appearance on the Alex Turner*** (Arctic Monkeys) / Miles Kane (The Rascals) / James Ford (Simian Mobile Disco) new musical project later in the year...

Defoe has joined back up with Harry Redknapp at Pompey (Good move for Defoe). Benjani move has gone stale and sounds a little dodgy...

Stories coming out of Jérôme Kerviel's question by the filth is proving veeeeeery interesting. Société Générale have twice declined their Executive Chairman Daniel Bouton's resignation. This story gets better and better...

Roman Totale has introduced me to this 12". It is incredible...

The amount of shit-hottt gigs in May will floor you. Some of them haven't been announced yet - but believe me, they will floor you...

Why did Dev Hynes turn his back on the beautiful music he made with Test Iclces and start writing folk instead? The lad is a ledge though, especially since he covered a bunch of Indie songs from 2001-2004 alongside Alex Turner in London the other week. I quite like Dev's guitar playing on cover of the quite spectacular anthem from the Von Bondies - C'mon C'mon! Look in here and select some fun videos...

The Orphanage is a Spanish Horror/Ghost story which looks freakin' awesome. Check out the official website and then go see it during the Jameson film festival...

Laterssssss...

***His missus is fucking ridiculously hot.
Here is a picture of Alexa for you to enjoy over the weekend...

(image)

I'll stop perving form here on out.



Domino will never sign a better band...

2008-01-31T17:41:51.251+00:00

(image)



There's actually awards for doing this?

2008-01-31T12:27:17.119+00:00

I'll level with you, I don't follow this blog malarky much.
Probably because I don't understand how so many blogs are popular considering the proprietor just cuts & pastes stories they have seen on the internet into their own blog. Not very original. However, I was happy to see a bunch of my favourite people get nominated for awards...

French Major who creeped in through the back-door because he is shacked up with an Irish lass....sneaky French fucker. ;)

Red (French's missus) who got nominated for lots. This pleases me as I get a lot of laughs from her blog (even when I am not supposed to).

Obscure Remix got nominated for a few too. His music taste (and knowledge) is second to none. He combines good tunes with dry humour, it's just a shame he's a shit drummer.

James Carroll is da-man when it comes to exchanging rumours & spreading gossip. I've said it a million times before but who would have thought someone from Tipperary would have gotten this far in life?

Nialler being nominated shouldn't really surprise anyone. He is a national landmark on t'internet. I can't wait for the next time he has to do visuals at a Nokia sponsored event.


Also, a lot of you seem to think that this is a music blog.
It initially was intended to be a blog of musical treats, but that idea deteriorated quite rapidly.
Now whenever I recommend an artist/act/band, it is usually because there is a girl in it who I think is hot.
So don't come here looking for music, you'll only be disappointed.



Run the little fucker down...

2008-01-29T15:24:08.860+00:00

It's been one week...

One week since my last cigarette...
I actually feel quite good...
I don't miss those beautiful bastards one bit...
I figured there was only one real way I was going to stay off the ciggies...
And that was by buying a bicycle (christ I love how alliteration comes together so brilliantly)...
I cycled my arse off last night on my swanky new bike...

It was a difficult decision trying to decide if I should spend my money on either a new mode of transport or upgrade to a cooler & faster skateboard.
I was going to opt for the latter because my deck is pretty dead right now...
But then I thought about it...
Cycling will get me fit and make me want to stay off the smokes...
Whereas people look much-much cooler skateboarding and smoking at the same time...
So with that in mind, I went for the rothar...
She is a peach. I haven't named her yet though.
I'm thinking Mary-Kate (because she is hotter than Ashley Olsen)...

So if you are driving a car in or around the city centre in Dublin...
Keep an eye out for a cocky cyclist who will be tearing it up on the streets...
You may just want to run him down...



2008's first Cult Icon...

2008-01-27T13:08:19.140+00:00

The Jérôme Kerviel story is my current obsession right now...
How this well-to-do trader beat the system to accumulate losses of €4.9 billion is staggering...
Was it all him trying to get that extra bonus?
Was Société Générale losses so bad that they needed a scape-goat?
Or did Kerviel just want to show everyone the extent to which the current French financial market is in?
The more I learn about these equity derivatives, the more fascinated I am by this ludicrous scandal...
It seems every hour there is another new breaking news interruption to this story...
The blue-collar folk in France see him as a hero. A man who stood up to the greedy rich pigs of their nation.
I have to agree with them.
At the tail-end of 2007, he had actually made a profit of €1.5 billion for SocGen...
But to cover up this paper-trail he had left behind him (as the profit he made was still done illegally), he actually started making deliberately bad bets against the current market so he could balance his winnings out...
Obviously he wasn't expecting the stock market to collapse so badly at the start of last week (at this point SocGen were only down €1.5 billion)...
But by Wednesday, it had risen to its current & startling figure...
He is in police custody now, so no doubt we will hear more stories throughout the week...
But right now, all I have to say is Vive le Jérôme Kerviel...!

(image)



Late on the bandwagon...

2008-01-27T10:20:32.724+00:00

More often than not now, music I initially slag off as being shit - I end up loving 2 months down the line...
I'm going to have to learn to keep my mouth shut and not be so dismissive & music-nazi like in future...
I'm generally very aggressive when I talk about a band or a song that I despise...
So it is quite embarrassing to turn around a little while later and talk about how much I actually now love said band...
In July/August 2007 James Carroller spoke to me about an artist who he said he liked and was tipping to be huge...
This was loooooong before she even released a single, was topping polls or winning awards...
I said I wasn't into her, thought she was so-so, sounded like everything else yaddayaddayadda...
4/5 months on and my piss-poor initial judgement is farcical...
Because right now - I am completely enthralled by Adele...
This young lady has bundles and bundles and BUNdles of talent, something which we should all be very jealous of (she's got really fucking amazing eyes too***)...
I watch live performances of her and I am blown away by that voice, that charm, that endearing charisma...
Very rarely do I walk away from meeting an artist with a very good lasting impression of them...
But Miss Adkins is right up there alongside Saul Williams as one of the better people to work/spend time with...
She is playing an intimate show in Crawdaddy on Sunday March 2nd before coming back in early Summer with a proper full-on 9 piece band to play a bigger venue...
I would recommend everyone to go to the intimate show as at will be one of those special gigs we all read so much about and wish we were at and then secretly tell people that we were actually at the gig...

Adele's Myspace...

This was a less cynical & more enthusiastic post (which is quite rare for me these days)...
Ergo - I'll have to end it on a high note...

What.
A.
Fucking.
Song.

Hometown Glory (live)...
(object) (embed)

***It's becoming obligatory now for me to name off the physical features I like most in each girl I post about.
I'm a little too callow nowadays I must admit.
;)



Do things come in 3's...?

2008-01-25T00:07:12.529+00:00

Is that really true?
If one good thing happens, does it have a domino effect and a couple more good'uns come rolling?
Because if it is truly legit then I cannot fookin' wait to see what nombre trois will be...


(image)
1. Glassjaw live in Tripod May 12th 2008...
One of my favourite bands of all time who I sing about non-stop will be here in May...
You need to see this band live, it'll be insane.
Back as a 4-piece with a new album to boot.
Daryl Palumbo is a GOD and stands shoulder to shoulder alongside some of my fave people ever.
Lyrically, he has mastered his craft, but the way he emphasizes the tone of every single syllable is incredible.
This should be down as the number 1 show for you to see in an already packed-full-of-awesome-gigs this May!


(image)
2. It's been almost a year to the day the last time I saw this girl. She came over for the best gig of 2007 (Brand New in Tripod) where we got to hang out with our hero Jesse Lacey and I will get to see her again soon (pretty much exactly one year on).
I was in love with this girl for the best part of 2 whole years so I am pretty excited at the prospect of seeing her again.
Nikki has turned into a professional journalist now though...
So I'll have to keep my trap shut and not get too drunk around her...
Nikki is allowed two pictures to be posted of her because I have never met a prettier girl in my life (yup, she is more attractive than Shannyn Sossamon which I'll admit right now)...
(image)



So what can number 3 be?
Havant & Waterloo beating Liverpool in the FA Cup?
Gerrard getting stretchered off with a broken leg?
Mourinho becoming the next Ireland manager?
Ireland winning the 6 Nations?
All of the really shit bands in the world dying?
Finding lots of money and being able to afford new music equipment?
Chris Morris becoming my best friend?
Spending a week in Montauk for free?
Canada only being a 30 minute journey away?
Dylan Moran taking up a residency in my living room?


Endless possibilities.



A Vaudeville Genius...

2008-01-24T12:32:49.356+00:00

(image)

Buster Keaton - the greatest actor, writer & director of all time.
I watch at least one of his movie everyday now - it's a ritual I haven't been able to break away from.



Phew....!

2008-01-22T19:04:22.590+00:00

I thought I was going to miss Broken Social Scene live this year because Sunset Rubdown is playing on the same night in Dublin (May 20th)...
However, I forgot about the fan-fucking-tastic ATP Festival the weekend before both dates...

So I will be hitting this up on Friday May 16th...

(image)



I want to be in their Scene...

2008-01-22T18:26:35.690+00:00

(image)

Courtesy of the good Dr. James Carroll over on his blog...
The mighty Broken Social Scene set up shop on our shores come May 20th...

I think this will be my 7th time to see them live...
A feat only Muse can rival...

So who (and by who I mean eye-candy) will be part of their tour set up...?
As we all know, Kevin "Princess" Drew only takes girls on tour whom he has fucked or can fuck...
Does that mean that Feist will be part of this scene to keep an eye on him?

Hotter-than-hot Lisa Lobsinger has left altogether to pursue magic with her own fine band Reverie Sound Revue...
Hainsey is finishing up the brand new Metric record so she wont be game...
Will Amy Millan still be touring with Stars by then?
Miss CBC Radio 3 Julie Penner usually tours all the time with the Scenesters...

Even though I have seen it so many times, I still get excited when I hear "It's All Gonna Break"...

"You all want the lovely music to save your lives..."


Cause = Time

(object) (embed)



Maya Arulpragasam...

2008-01-21T17:06:49.103+00:00

There's no point to this post really...
I have nothing of any real worth to say...
Other than God-Bless Yousef at Mongrel Magazine for taking this picture...

(image)



Bits and Pieces...

2008-01-19T10:56:34.101+00:00

Jim Dubh, where the hell is your blog? Who else can I find who's an El Ten Eleven fan...? Update me bro...

Sunset Rubdown is playing Crawdaddy in May. Spencer Krug - You are a legend...

My mate Chris is paranoid that his ferociously hot girlfriend is cheating on him. So he has hired an investigator to check out the situation. Jack & myself find this fucking hilarious.
1. Chris is only 23.
2. He hasn't even been with her that long.
3. Most of us think she's a cunt.
4. Chris is a little too sensitive and insecure.
5. It's bloody funny as hell though.

I have stumbled across a couple of blogs that entertain me to no end. One is called College Call Girl, which you really don't need any explanations on what it's about. The other is from a cute little Irish American girl called Baby Sinead. Mostly about sex, music, photography, alcohol, porn, art, her cat - it's very witty and funny (and Sinead is hot).

I have tried to switch from drinking Guinness to JD & Coke but it's just not happening...

Last night I came home fairly late (about 3am) and learned So Real by Jeff Buckley on guitar. Someone mentioned over on Jim's blog about Jeff being overrated. Gah - totally disagree.

I get ID'd for cigarettes every single day now. There's no way I look younger than 18.

I have discovered nice little parts of Dublin which I actually don't mind.

The amount of spam I receive is getting into silly figures. The latest one to amuse me is from a Billie Vanessa, with the subject of the email being the quite genius "blonde toying pussiy about five"...They spelt everything correct apart from pussy?!?! The email itself obviously contained a link, but just above the link was this: "Hello, cutie loves cock." Hahahah, brilliant!

Some fucker nearly ran me over yesterday. I was on my skateboard crossing the road and he sped up to try and nick me. He had gold jewellery and a burberry cap on though, so I kept the obscenities to a minimum in case him and his mates brought me onto the northside to take my kneecaps. Knackers.

The girl who I was going to make a mixed CD for all of those many moons ago rejected my ass like a motherfucker. I can't even go and get a coffee in the place she works part-time now because it's too fucking embarrassing. I really liked the coffee from there too.

I'm hungry and in need of a coffee, a cigarette and The Guardian Newspaper.



Man Stroke Woman...

2008-01-16T18:27:27.910+00:00

This was possibly one of the funniest sketch shows the BBC has ever done...
Very clever sketches which had no studio audience or laugh track (very rare for any show which followed a similar format)...
Produced by Ash Atalla (the man behind The Office fame), it features a shitload of really cool actors...
But there is one in particular who is one of the finest comedy actors around at the minute...

Yup, of course I am biased because I'm a huge Nick Frost fan...
Spaced was the shit...
Danger! 50,000 Volts was the shit...
Shaun of the Dead was the shit...
Hot Fuzz was the shit...
But Man Stroke Woman was comedy gold...

My favourite character of Nick's was Uncle Jack, who was constantly pissed up or on pills and made his 12 year old nephew come along for the ride...
You should definitely pick this up on DVD from Tower Records because it's hilarious...
Watch some clips on YouTube and then make up your mind about it, but I guarantee you'll love it...
There is too many amazing clips to show you, but I'll settle for just the Uncle Jack ones...



Uncle Jack drunk and driving with his nephew:
(object) (embed)


Uncle Jack on pills with his nephew:
(object) (embed)


Uncle Jack at a strip club with his nephew:
(object) (embed)



Up and Down Up and Down Up and...

2008-01-14T22:57:55.781+00:00

I don't think I should be a blogger...
I don't post nearly as much as I should.
Also, I originally intended for this to be a music blog...
What the hell happened there?

All of the beautiful things I was speaking about pre New Years have turned slightly wrong...
My skateboard is just about keeping itself in one piece, she'll have to be retired soon...
I'm not happy because good decks are fucking expensive...
My abstaining from alcohol lasted a whole day or two I think...
My coffee and cigarettes intake has increased dramatically...
The camera is away getting fixed, so photography is on a time-out...
And my writing, Christ, it is lacking of imagination and remains totally desolate...

January blues are hitting home like a motherfucker...

And when you are at your lowest point, something beautiful happens...
It cannot be described, it's a feeling of jubilation, triumph, exhilaration, ecstasy, euphoria, bliss...
What is unfolding before your eyes is in slow motion...
Yes, you guessed it - WE THRASHED THE GEORDIE SCUM 6-0!

I don't pity those fucks at all...
Bring back Keegan and then throw in Shearer for the hell of it...
It wont change the fact that you're a mid-table team at best...
"They'll bring back the glory days to the North East!"...
Haha, there was never any glory days in Newcastle...
Tenth in the league isn't actually bad for a team like Newcastle...
And with the dirty Scousers drawing at the Boro and Birmingham holding Arsenal at the Emirates, well January Blues no longer became part of my vocabulary...

So here we go, United's six goals against Newcasle, including Ronaldo's first hat-trick for us...

(object) (embed)

And just for comedy value, the legendary rant from Keegan...
"He's got to go to Middlesborough and get something from them"...!
Yeah Keegan, we went there and got a 3-0 win you cunt...

(object) (embed)