Sat, 01 Oct 2016 05:01:10 Z
They describe this as "ready for the road" but try to drive it through town and you'll probably get a ticket.
Like most laptops, this HP Laptop is quite portable. But don't think you can strap some wheels on this laptop and take it out for a spin around the block. It's got a good processor, some great RAM, plenty of bells and whistles, but it will never ever EVER be street legal without major modifications.
A much better plan would be to just buy a car and hire a driver and then leave the laptop in the back seat. Then maybe you could just use it while someone else drove you around town. Surely you can find enough open wi-fi spots, can't you? There are plenty of Starbuckses* out there these days.
*Starbux? Starbuckz? Starbuckss? Starbi? Who can say...
Sat, 01 Oct 2016 05:00:00 Z
Fri, 30 Sep 2016 05:00:37 Z
May your gutters runneth over.
All of the world's problems come down to one thing: we're a throw-away society. We use things a couple times then we toss them. Think of all we could do if we looked at trash not as trash, but as treasure.
Take all those leaves filling your gutters, for instance. Why would you want to get rid of those?! Do you even realize how many festive decoupage mason jars you could make with them? Or how about those foil covers on yogurt containers? If we lined up all the discarded lids, it would wrap around the world twice. How nice would that be? An adorable, handmade yogurt lid belt for the Earth!
The point we're trying to make is, maybe don't be so quick to let robots like this one dispose of stuff you could actually use later. You know that floating island of garbage in the ocean? We hear they want to clean that up! What a shame to think that one day the astronauts might look down from space and not see the beautiful mosaic we crafted just for them.
Fri, 30 Sep 2016 05:00:00 Z
Fri, 30 Sep 2016 05:00:00 Z
Just because they do, doesn't mean you should.
Thu, 29 Sep 2016 05:00:25 Z
Floor's best friend, dog's worst enemy.
You can buy your dog the fanciest, most expensive dog toys in the world, but nothing will ever make him as crazy-hyper as the vacuum.
Traditional stuffed dog toys not only fail to hold a dog's attention for more than ten minutes at a time, they also leave your floors covered in all manner of string, fuzz, and gnarled, wet scraps of cloth.
On the other hand, a vacuum will keep your floors spotless and clean, all while providing your pet with hours and hours of entertainment and excitement.
Maybe even enough excitement go get him to nap peacefully for the rest of the afternoon? Listen, we're not making any promises here.
Thu, 29 Sep 2016 05:00:00 ZHello there. Nice punning last week. It might be a record number of entries but we're too lazy to count so we'll just assume it is. Congratulations to tjamil for guessing the Secret Pun, which was "The Amaizeing Race." Check your PM folder for your $15 coupon code. This week's theme, vehicles and food, comes to us from our very own manhandsha. The Secret Pun is back down to $5. Examples: Kaleblazer Broncorn Subarutabaga And now for our favorites from last week, House of Chards: LaFern & Shirley (barkwoot) Mad About Yew (moles1138) The Cukes of Hazzard (Coogles) Honorable Mentions: Hay Arnold! (axphw1) Desperate Houseplants (Coogles) Columbough (donthaveone) Zinnia: Warrior Princess (GodfatherND) LOLZ: Here Comes Honey Bamboo (guitarart) Flora the Explorer (zepherp) Now that we're actually giving stuff away, the legal peeps tell us we need these Terms and Conditions. So there they are. [...]
Wed, 28 Sep 2016 05:00:00 Z
WELCOME TO LIVE FROM THE INTERNET! The theme this week is fruit!
MANGO, PINEAPPLE, BANANA!!!
Would you like some orange?
Or what about a nice slice of watermelon?
Ok, ok. I know what you're waiting for. You're waiting for this video. It's everywhere. I can't not post it. I've gotta do it! PEN PINEAPPLE APPLE PEN!!!
Ok, sorry. Now for the real moment that you've really been waiting for. The winner of the GOLDEN COMPUTER AWARD. Let's check out that prize real quick, shall we?
Our winner this week is...moles1138 for posting this fantastic banana video! Check it out!
Thanks for sending that awesome video, moles1138! Feel free to grab yourself that badge, if you so choose.
Send in more stuff! The theme is no longer fruit, but you can still send fruit videos if you want to. The new theme is everything! Send me everything! See you next week!!!
Tue, 27 Sep 2016 05:00:00 ZDo you celebrate National Peanut Day every September 13? Of course, we all do! It's a cruel coincidence that the peanut's big moment comes every fall, just as kids are returning to their increasingly peanut-free schools. If you're not allergic, you probably love peanuts in your trail mix, on sundaes, or in sandwiches (butter form only). But how much do you really know about the protein-rich foodstuff? Jeopardy!'s Ken Jennings is here to tell us that a lot of your favorite facts about this beloved snack are just plain nuts. The Debunker: Is There a Clinical Fear of Getting Peanut Butter Stuck on the Roof of Your Mouth? There's an eighteen-letter-word that's been a trivia favorite for decades, appearing everywhere from board games to Snapple caps to reference books: arachibutyrophobia. This scary-sounding psychiatric disorder is usually cited as something fairly harmless-seeming: "the fear of getting peanut butter stuck on the roof of your mouth." Boy, psychiatrists have a phobia for everything these days, don't they?!? The etymology of the word seems sensible enough: "arachi-" comes from Arachis, the genus to which the peanut plant belongs. (Webster's speculates that this may be because of this family of plants' arachnid-like tendrils that extend down and grow under the soil.) Butyrum is the Latin word for butter. There's no "roof of your mouth" in there, but "arachibutyrophobia" does sound plausibly like what a scientist would call the irrational fear of peanut butter. The problem is that I can find no mention of arachibutyrophobia in any medical literature, except as a recent oddity sourced from the Internet. The source of this iffy word is usually given as the 1985 Modesty Blaise novel Dead Man's Handle, by Peter O'Donnell, or a May 19, 1982 Peanuts strip by Charles Schulz, in which Sally reads a school report on the word. Both those attributions are wrong, however. The word was actually introduced to America by the 1975 pop reference classic The People's Almanac, in which it's included in a list of phobias. Prior to 1975, I can find no citations of arachibutyrophobia anywhere; afterward, newspaper columnists couldn't get enough of it. So I reached out to David Wallechinsky, who wrote the People's Almanac books along with his father, novelist Irving Wallace. Could "arachibutyrophobia" have been their little joke? He reports that the book's phobia list was written by lexicographer Robert Hendrickson, who did submit a bibliography which included interviews, but that those files were recently donated to Claremont University. Unless any readers in the Los Angeles area want to stop by the Claremont library and delve further, the arachibutyrophobia trail is cold. As cold as a thick, suffocating layer of peanut butter coating the roof of your mouth. Quick Quiz: What word for "pleasant" or "tasty" comes to us from the Latin word for the roof of the mouth? Ken Jennings is the author of eleven books, most recently his Junior Genius Guides, Because I Said So!, and Maphead. He's also the proud owner of an underwhelming Bag o' Crap. Follow him at ken-jennings.com or on Twitter as @KenJennings. [...]
Mon, 26 Sep 2016 05:00:30 Z
We're pretty sure Alta, Blaze, and Surge are Fitbits but they may also be superheroes
Alta, Blaze, and Surge are...
(a) fitness smartwatches that track your health activities
(b) superheroes sworn to protect Earth from the scourge of Crimulious the Undoer
(c) an impressive lineup of hardcore sludge metal bands playing at The Doom Crêpery tonight
(d) three new flavors of energy drink that will make you go legally insane
(e) nicknames for my turtles