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Updated: 2017-10-11T09:04:26.956-05:00

 



Terri, I'm 59 years old. I was/am so very in love...

2007-10-14T19:49:00.000-05:00

Terri, I'm 59 years old. I was/am so very in love with Jim. I really can't see a time when I would take on another relationship, even if the opportunity were to knock.



As for the why's..You will drive yourself nuts thi...

2007-10-14T19:38:00.000-05:00

As for the why's..You will drive yourself nuts thinking about it. I'm sorry Ronnie, and i know i didn't know him but he was a very selfish person to do what he did to you!. I am so angry for you! You know some of the stuff i've ben through lately, and i'm pretty ill on top of all that, and Yes, i have considered suicide...The pain makes you think that way, but i will say this, first i have everything in order,because i KNOW i hurt and i am not well, second i would NEVER make a mess anyone had to clean up, there are nicer ways to go, like sleeping pills! and Third but not least i would NEVER forget the one who loves me by not leaving everthing i owned to him!. as for was any of it YOUR fault??? I had a man who had to be pushed into stuff too Ronnie..it's frustrating! you shouldn't have to do that!..and after a while you get numb to it...been there did that. after everything i went through i learned to get it done by myself i don't ask anymore!..Your in that place now, and if you are ever with someone again i bet you will never depend on someone like that again..i know i never will..if someone hasn't been where you are they will not get it, it's time for you to care for YOU..be number ONE to yourself you deserve it! Yeah i know peeps will think that what i say is selfish..but then again, they haven't walked in my shoes.. if they did they would know what i mean. Sorry if this is long or seems out of character for me, I'm just tired and in pain,and a little bitchy,so i'm not at my politically best right now, and i mean NO offense towards you, i just want you to know i care, and hope all turns out well for you, what your going through is unfair to say the least.



Good golly. I think the whole thing stinks. Bless ...

2007-10-14T17:47:00.000-05:00

Good golly. I think the whole thing stinks. Bless your heart, Ronni.



Nadine, this is something I've hesitated to discus...

2007-10-14T15:15:00.000-05:00

Nadine, this is something I've hesitated to discuss, but, as the situation should be resolved fairly quickly, I guess it may be time.

Jim's Will was not valid. If he was going to type something, it would have had to be witnessed by two people to be valid. If he was going to leave an unwitnessed Will, it would have had to be handwritten.

The fact that he died intestate means that his BROTHER, to whom he had barely spoken in ten years, gets half of everything. He cannot force me to sell the house, but he will get half the money if I should choose to sell it.

My lawyer is attempting to work something out with him.



Ronni, as I told you, my husband chose a place to ...

2007-10-14T13:54:00.000-05:00

Ronni, as I told you, my husband chose a place to definitely send a message to me. He knew a lot about guns and we even talked about suicide by gun years ago because I worked with a man who had been with the NYPD and became a vegetable because of where he pointed the gun to his head.
My husband said you have to "eat" the gun to be absolutely sure...and that is what he did.

His doctor (and mine) said I was lucky he did not take me with him because that is what the pharaohs did - took their wives?? Don't know if that is true, but luckily for me, my husband chose to go alone.



Ronni, I can't help but be angry for you, right al...

2007-10-14T13:52:00.000-05:00

Ronni, I can't help but be angry for you, right along with you. No matter how much pain someone's in, I just can't imagine not caring how doing what he did would affect those that loved him. The damage he did is inexcusable.

Possumbear, I read about your friend's situation in the previous postings. What a terrible thing for his wife, who I hope will recover physically from the abuse. I'm glad he didn't take her and the children with him when he ended it. I also wonder if his Will is valid, as he was obviously not of sound mind when he made changes to it. That's another reason I'm surprised Jim's Will isn't questionable, as he was not in a good state of mind when he wrote his wishes. I'd be really aggressive about pursuing that aspect.



Perhaps Jim did this act at home so he would be fo...

2007-10-14T12:24:00.000-05:00

Perhaps Jim did this act at home so he would be found immediately. Of course he would not be concerned about sparing you and Brendan any trauma because this was selfish behavior on his part anyway. Again, he selfishly loathed the idea of lying somewhere dead for hours on end, so he decided to have you and Brendan to be the first to witness this nightmare. You are such a strong, sensible and intellectual woman. Don't forget that. Pat yourself on the back and keep on keeping on.



Hi, Possum!Here's one somebody sent me; it has som...

2007-10-14T09:32:00.000-05:00

Hi, Possum!

Here's one somebody sent me; it has some interesting thoughts, but there isn't much out there that I have found really helpful.

http://www.thubtenchodron.org/DeathAndDying/a_meditation_for_survivors_of_suicide.html

It's a Buddhist meditation.

I'm so sorry about your friend...it seems that there are a lot of us touched by suicide.

I got a book about expalining it to children that Chandra has right now. I haven't read it yet, but will send you the name of it...



No one will ever know Ronni.I have been helping lo...

2007-10-14T09:24:00.000-05:00

No one will ever know Ronni.

I have been helping look after two adorable children, who's father took his life last week, and their Mum is doing a lot of thinking as well.

So many unanswered question they leave.

Ronni have you got a website that you have found helpful to you over the last weeks, that I may be able to pass onto my friends family?



Yeah. For sure, he wouldn't want to mess up the M...

2007-10-13T22:08:00.000-05:00

Yeah. For sure, he wouldn't want to mess up the Miata.



Perhaps Jim didn't trust himself to drive, or had ...

2007-10-13T21:53:00.000-05:00

Perhaps Jim didn't trust himself to drive, or had too much to drink and couldn't. He was nonfunctional at the time, I am sure. This was not a rational act. It was all about him, you know? He was thinking of no one else. Only humself. Spewing veracitudes and invections here. You are a very courageous and beautiful woman. Don't lose sight of that focus. xxooasusual