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Preview: A Single Mom's Journey Through Life.........

A Single Mom's Journey Through Life.........

Updated: 2016-05-18T22:45:54.752-05:00


Have You Been Good or Bad?


It's Christmas Eve and I'm stuck working! Our wall thermostat went out last night and we had no heat. Thank you for 24 hour repair services. I'm not thinking of the bad things right now, only the good. I've had a writer's block lately. You should see all my "drafts" from the last couple of weeks. For now, pictures will have to do. I wish YOU ALL A VERY SAFE AND MERRY CHRISTMAS. Peace out for now.
Me And Some Giggly Women


Our Christmas Grab Bag Group 2008 (That's my momma in the red next to me)


No Shoes, No Car, No Work


Well, things have been going fast........yet nothing seems to get done. Do you ever feel that way? That's how I feel. Still haven't found those shoes. Mainly because I haven't had the time to go look. I'm still adjusting being back to work full time. I still don't have a car. Ugh.

Today, Missy woke us up with a BAM! this morning by having a 103.2 fever. That's always fun for 6:00 a.m. So, what do we do? Well, just like all normal couples........we flip a coin to see who calls off of work. Darn, I should've picked "heads". Turns out it's strep throat. Poor little thing hasn't moved a muscle all day. She can't go back to school until Monday. We'll see if she makes it to the birthday sleepover she's supposed to attend on Saturday night! So, the Tiger stays home tomorrow while I go make the dough........

Now here's some random pictures because I'm bored.......

Christmas 2007


Thanksgiving 2008


A Girl Just Wants Shoes........


I'm on the hunt for a cheap pair of black dress shoes. I've been wearing my favorite ones for months. Needless to say, I think they started to smell. The Tiger says I am nuts and just looking for a reason to buy a new pair of shoes. I think he's crazy. I threw the stinky shoes away.

I had a 20% off coupon for Payless..........and it expired today. I usually have decent luck when I go to Payless, but I admit it's been awhile since we've been there. I didn't find a darn thing! Really, is the only heels that people wear those little stick heels??? I'm sorry, but I am not talented enough for a heel like that. I need something a little thicker.

So, of course Missy found a pair of shoes she liked.....and I have a hard time passing up coupons that are about to expire. Missy got shoes, I have none.

We then went to Meijer. I found a cute pair of black heels, but they were $39.99! Yeah, I am cheap and would never pay $40 for a pair of Meijer. Who do they think they are? DSW? I think not!

Have you seen any cute shoes sales going on anywhere? I'm dying for new black heels......

And You Know What Else........


I meant to post a couple of pictures in my last post there.......but I hit the Publish button too fast! Anywhooo, just some random pics that I feel like uploading. It's been awhile.

My Flapper Friend and Me as a Bride


As a lady bug (Can you tell I love to dress up?)


Missy finally lost a top tooth! Look how long her hair is getting.......


YAY! Changes......


Just keepin on truckin over here! The holidays are beginning and I just love this time of year. I cannot stand the cold, but I do love the decorating and the cooking and the shopping and the hustle and bustle. Lots happening around here.........

I found a school! More Than A Single Mom will be heading to that is. I found a credited school that will transfer my credits (not sure which ones yet), allow me to work, and still go to school without having to find a sitter or spend more time away from Missy. My new major you ask?'s a bachleor in Business Administration with a Concentration on Human Resources Management sound? Say that 10 times fast.

And I'm on the hunt for a new car. My beloved 1997 Grand Am has finally said it's last prayers I do believe. I'll know more soon........

Tonight I am bound and determine to catch up with y'all! You'll see.......

Green Bean Casserole


Tis the time of year that we give thanks.........and pig out on turkey until we can't eat anymore. This year I am giving thanks for having a job, it may be a temp job for now, but it's still a job. And that more than I can say for a lot of people during this recession. My mom lost her job this week. The Tiger's company did a lay off yesterday (thankfully he passed the first cut!), one of my best friends lost her job 6 weeks ago and still can't find a new one, and my stepdad's company is possibly doing lay offs by the first of the year. AND these are just the people that little ol' me knows. I can't imagine how many other millions of people out there are scared over their jobs.

Now, on to food. It's the time of year for the traditional Thanksgiving feast........makes my mouth water just thinking about it. What does your family have on Turkey Day? And what's your favorite part of the meal? Let me know. Me? Personally, my favorite is left over turkey sandwiches the next day while laying on the couch in a turkey hang over. Well, I've been wondering.........WHO invented green bean casserole? It is one of the ugliest dishes I've ever seen, and I don't like green beans so I won't eat it. But have no fear, I am sure my mama is making it. Gross!!!!

I'd like to make a new sort of side dish this year. Something my family will love. I'm looking to all of your for ideas. I'm a good cook, not a chef, but I know my way around a kitchen. So I promise not to mess up your dish. But, I need a new that doesn't involve green beans. Thanks so much.

A Chance To Blog


I have to make some major updates. Lordy lordy, I've been slacking.

Ok, well after days and nights of thoughts, tears, packing, and much more I ended up deciding I could no longer run away from my problems (at the request of my parents). They sat me down one night and explained to me that they have no problems helping me get back on my feet, but that I am almost 30 and I cannot continue to run everytime things go wrong. What did they call it? "Lack of folowing through." Hmpf, of course I was mad. I don't do that.........or do I? Ok, maybe I do. So, I decided to go ahead and give the Tiger another shot at our relationship. I truly love him with all my heart, but can we get past our problems? Not so sure. But, he's damn lucky he's getting that second shot and so far he's been doing ok. He's helping me vaccuum, doing his own laundry, and we are back to sleeping in the same room. We'll see how it goes. Missy is so happy about it. But, I still HATE my school system. No offense to anyone, but it's too ghetto for my taste. Not in the greatest of neighborhoods. So I am looking into trying to qualify for special funding to help send her to a private school next year. Any help on how to do that if any of you have experience, let a sista know!

Work and school? Well, I am officially out of school until January. I need to really pull myself together before I go back. It made me miserable, tore my family apart, and made my daughter defy me in ways I never thought possible. So, full time nursing program is NOT the way to go. I am much happier without it. I know I have too many credits to lose, and I WILL be back in January........just undecided as to what to do. I got a temp to perm job at a steel mill in Hammond doing payroll. I know Payroll and Human Resources best, so I went back to "comfortable." It's a step down from what I was doing in Chicago, but you know what? Let someone else have the responsibility for now. Right now, I just want to be a worker bee and get paid. Just pray they hire me on permanently, cuz I need a full time job.

And in the middle of my hell, who calls? Missy's father. Haven't heard from him since.....well I couldn't tell you the last time we talked. He says, "Hey Jenni, it's Billy" like we are friends or something. I say, "yeah what's up?" He says, "How's my daughter?" I said, "She's fine. She's 7. Where you been? He hasn't seen her since she was 4. Guess he's living in California right now. Good, nice and far away where I'd like him to stay. So yeah, I let him talk to her. She tells him she needs clothes (she doesn't need clothes, but she's slick like mama). So he agrees to send her a box of stuff. He sent it. Of course I received no receipts to return anything. Most of it either doesn't fit her or she doesn't like it. Thanks Billy, next time just send me the 5 years of child support you owe me. OH and he has the nerve to ask me what we can do about child visitation. Um, you're in Cali and I am in Indiana. We do nothing about it. It'll be a cold day in you know where before I put my baby on a plane to you. End of story.

I've got some new bloggers that I need to check out and I've got all my old bloggers to catch up with. I've missed you all. Stayed tuned. The rollercoaster of my life is just starting I am sure.

Some Days Are Good. Some Days Are Bad.


Life is still a constant roller coaster here. Some days I am ok with everything going on. Other days I feel so lonely and wonder if I am making the biggest mistake of my life. I love the Tiger. I really love him. I look at him everyday and wonder what went wrong. Why can't it be different? All along I thought it was him. We were breaking up because of him. As the days go on, I am beginning to think it's me. Maybe it's really not, maybe it's the guilt of looking at my life being packed up in boxes once again. Either way, the decision has been made and it's not something that can be changed now. It is what it is. But, sometimes I still feel so sad. As if now I am going to be alone forever. 30 is coming up next year. I always thought I'd be married long before 30. Looks like I'll be single.

House hunt is interesting. I enjoy seeing how others live and what they describe as a "spacious 2 bedroom with a beautiful view." I think I finally found the perfect place for me and Missy last night. I am waiting on my application to be mailed to me.

Job hunting is slow. I have an interview today for a temp to perm job at a steel company. If I could get it, that would mean some nice benefits. But, let's not try and get our hopes up here. I am rusty in all of this stuff.

Something Too Pretty Not To Share


I am constantly motivated and mesmerized by writings. When I was a child, I longed to be a writer when I grew up. I read every single book I could possibly read and I lived through my books. I would day dream up my own stories. That dream faded like most other dreams as you age. I still write sometimes. But, mostly just scribbled thoughts at the end of the grocery list or on an envelope of a bill. Nothing concrete anymore. I hope to get back to all of that in my new life.

So I came across this today. Written by a friend who is a new mother. One of the most beautiful things I've seen in awhile. All of you new mothers can appreciate this. Heck, even if your baby is 30 years old you can close your eyes and picture your daughter as an can relate too.

Have you ever seen an angel sleep? Those cherub little cheeks and that picture of a halo that floats so serene above her precious head. The beautiful white flowing dress. She's as pure as the first snow fall. This angel I see was a gift to me.

Have you ever heard an angel laugh? That little giggle that echoes in your ears but most of all your heart. The bluest of eyes beaming with joy as she melts you from the inside out. An angel with a laugh that I will hear forever!

Have you ever been touched by an angel? With skin so fair and soft that it feels like feathers? The grasp of her hand as if it speaks directly to your heart, telling you stories that only a mother can understand.

Have you ever smelled an angel? A mix of soap and cotton candy and this morning's bubble bath. A sweet smell that leaves you wanting more. A smell that will take you where the rest of the world can't. It's as if you can fly with her.

This angel, you see, is one given to me. The most precious gift in the world. A daughter. My daughter.

Why Children Are Funny


So, we all know that Missy has some sort of relationship with God that I have not quite figured out yet? Well, here's a conversation we had today in Wal-mart. Yep, right in the Halloween candy isle.

Missy: Mom, can I get this?

Me: (No answer. I was thinking. I'm pretty spacy these days)

Missy: MOM!

Me: Huh? What sweetie?

Missy: Why don't you talk anymore?

Me: I am sorry kiddo. I am just distracted lately.

Missy: Is God pulling you different ways?

Me: Yeah, I guess so. I'm just really tired and stressed. I'm sorry.

Missy: Well, you know God was pulling me two different ways, but he finally told me the way to go.

Me: Really? Which way is he telling you to go?

Missy: He's telling me to move away so that you won't be sad anymore.

Me: Thanks Miss. Anything God is telling you for me because I can't really hear him?

Missy: Yeah. He says for you to move as soon as you can. And to wear your hair down more. He likes your hair down.

Me: (laughing)......oh that's so cute. Thanks.

Soooooooo, we continue walking. Then Missy says, "Oh and he also said if you don't start praying at dinnertime, you may not go to Heaven."

What am I ever going to do with this child? She cracks me up.

Wordless Wednesday - Here's To Finding Old Friends


I came across this picture this morning, an old pic of me and some friends. It made me smile.

I Am Thankful


I am thankful to everyone who is there for me during this hard time. You never really know what you have until times like this. And I have some of the best friends in the world. Missy had a wonderful weekend thanks to my mom and two of my friends. A friend of mine, who doesn't blog, took her to a fair on Saturday and swimming. And you all know Sheryl, she has been my church mom all along. I never have had a chance to blog about her stepping in and taking Missy to church. But, she is now revealed! Missy is having a wonderful time going to church with her. For whatever reason, I think it's amazing she is being called by God to follow Him. Sheryl and her husband Scott really couldn't be anymore of a perfect match to help her through this journey.

Right now, I am kicking myself. I gave up just about everything to move in with the Tiger. All my belongings were either sold or given away because he already had a house full of stuff. So, now when I leave all I have is one dresser, one bed, a bookshelf, toys, clothes, and a cedar chest. Everything else I am going to need. Note to self: Do not make this mistake again.

Yes, I am giving up school until January. I am sorry this will disappoint everyone. But, I cannot continue to go to Nursing school full time, work full time, and be a mom. Time to get off my butt and go back to work full time. I plan to enter back in school in January, possibly with a new major. One that I go to school part time and it not affect my life too much. Maybe something online would be ideal. Oh wait, I won't have a computer either. There's always my parents.

I've made a resume' and emailed it to a girl that manages an employment agency. I have an appointment to fill out an application there tomorrow so they can start placing me. I am trying for a job in Indiana, before I attempt to have to go back to Chicago. I don't want to do the commute again. But, that's where the money we will see.

Please Turn The Lights On


It's dark in here. Someone turn the lights on. Please pray for me. This should be, by far, the saddest blog I hope to ever write. Life can't get any worse right now.

Last December, right before Christmas, I wrote a sad poem. I can't find it right now, because it was before I labeled all my posts. And I just don't have the energy to search for it right now. But, it was a poem about something that broke my heart.

9 months later and I am still not over that night. I don't think I ever will be. Tonight, my life took a turn I never thought it would go.

The Tiger and I broke up. Shocking, I know. I keep thinking over and over in my head. Is this real? How does a love you thought would never end all of a sudden just end? We haven't gotten along in a really long time. I've just been fighting the inevitable. But, it finally came out in the open. It is what it is.

So, now the questions play into my do I say good bye to 2 and 1/2 years? Where will I live? How will I finish school without his help? And what will I tell Missy? I have no idea how to tell her. How can I tell her that I managed to fail at giving her the only chance of a dad she ever had? I am not perfect. I really didn't fail. It just wasn't meant to be. I am not really to blame for this. Or am I? It still hurts so bad. I have a final on Monday. I don't have time for this. But, I must face it.

Please let me be strong and make it through this. It's late. I have no one to call. So I poured my heart out in my blog. Sorry if I've upset anyone.

And The Wedding.......


I will have more pictures soon. I am waiting for the CD that's going around to print out all the awesome pictures! But, for now these will have to do.

The dress fit perfectly! 13 lbs. down.....


The Maid of Honor Wore Pink


The New Mr. and Mrs.


What a Beautiful Couple!


That's all I have for now, but I don't have the CD yet to show you the rest! Someday they will pop up out of nowhere..........

Real Quick! A Cute Picture


A friend of mine emailed me this pic from Labor Day. It's so cute I think. And neck looks skinner.

Off to the "wedding weekend". See ya when I get back!


Wanna See Something Gross?


Disclaimer: A follow up in my last blog. A wonderful girl that I've been friends with for years has volunteered to join the "Missy Goes To Church" team after reading my blog. I won't reveal her just yet, she knows who she is. She is a wonderful person and one of my dearest of friends. She reminds me of Mary Poppins. So poised, good natured, pretty, but she dresses better! This weekend will be their first outing and Missy is SO excited. More about that next week.Now on to todays' blog. So I've mentioned before I was in this wedding. The dress is called "Pool". And my big butt didn't fit in the dress. I got tired of people telling me I was over reacting. "It'll be fine. Don't worry" or "Please. You look little" was all I heard when I tried to talk about it a couple of months ago. Guess what? I took proof there WAS something to worry about. So approaching my challenge, I took pictures. And no one has ever seen them........before now. So go ahead and look. They are a little blurry. It's hard to stand in a 12 inch bathroom, in a dress that is too small, try and take pictures, and pray no one in the house found you doing it.It sorta fit from the front........Wow, didn't know I was the pregnant bridesmaid.......This is really how far it zips up.......So, the question is........does the dress fit? Well, after shedding 12 pounds, I am proud to say it does. I don't look great in it, but that sucker zips up. I probably won't blog again before the weekend, so you'll just have to sit in suspense until my next post when I put the wedding pictures up to see the finished product. Tomorrow I go for the nail/toe thing (with Missy of course). After that, I will be moving on to turn my one eyebrow into two again. I love when I get to pay lots of money to be all princess-like for a weekend.[...]

When God Calls You......


I've never claimed to be a religious person. God and I have had our ups and downs throughout life. I had a lot of tragic things happen to me over time so it was hard to keep faith during all of it. A couple of years ago, before the Tiger, Missy and I belonged to a church. We went every week. I can't exactly remember why we stopped going. But, then I started working on the weekends and church is no longer an option since I work on every Sunday. And starting next week, I will be in school at night on Mon. thru Thurs.

So, then there's Missy. This child craves to go to church. She's the only child I know around me that goes to her room to read her bible (not all the time, but it's random and cute). She has a children's bible and has been reading it for the past two years. She is constantly asking me when we can go back to church. But, I don't know the answer. I am in school for another 15 months so I'll be working weekends until then. And will it be too late then? Will she lose her interest by the time I'm available for church? What am I supposed to do? My mom watches her every Sunday while I work and she'd never take her to church. My mom is about the most un-religious person I know. But, I feel bad. It's almost as if God is calling to my child to come because she has no one religious around her and yet she still craves Him and is so curious.

A Random Night Of Thoughts


Ok, this blog was inspired by an earlier post. Look 3 posts down......when I was tagged. Remember my hummingbird? Well, I was sitting at a friend's house tonight ....... and guess what? She has a hummingbird too! So I said it out loud. I said, "I wonder if you can make a hummingbird your pet." She responded and I kid you not.......we had a 15 min. conversation on capturing hummingbirds.

School is right around the corner! Missy lost her 2nd tooth. She's getting so big. Yesterday, she left the nest for the first time. Tiger stood outside while she rode her bike around the corner to the park and back. I got choked up. It's the first time I wasn't there to watch out for cars and gravel and loose dogs....... what a moment.

Wordless Wednesday - Libby Lu Fun!


Missy and her cousin Lilybug doing the girl thang......


Wordless Wednesday - This Is My Mama



When You're Tagged..........


Holla y'all! I've been tagged by the lovely, sweet Sheryl.

So, you want to know 6 randoms thing about me, huh? Read on my on.

1. I am not a shower singer. Never have been. I know my limits and singing is one of them. I only sing in the car when I am alone or when I am in a bar at 2:00 a.m. and do not remember that I am tone deaf.

2. I have control issues. I think I can finally admit that one. I just like things in my life to be "just so" and I have a hard time when there is chaos and not organization. At 1, Missy started lining her shoes up by pairs in her closet. Hmmmmm, maybe I put the same irrational thoughts in her??

3. There is a hummingbird outside my window right now. It's so cute and just hanging out there as if to tell me my flower boxes are just too dirty and can't be stepped on. I wonder if you can catch a hummingbird and keep it in your house.

4. Tiger hates the TV and I am secretly in love with it. All its beautiful channels and funny little shows. If it were up to him, we would get rid of all of the televisions and quit poisoning our brains. If it were up to me, I'd install one in the shower.

5. It's finals week and I couldn't be happier. I am ready to move on and past chemistry and advanced algebra! By the way, I hate my school. Since I didn't pass that one class back in January, I have to take it again in fall. Ok, fine. No big deal. Except they told me the only "room" for me is in the night program. Thank you Ivy Tech for helping ruin my life just a little bit more and complicating things again. Geez, all I want is a Nursing degree. These people are doing everything to try and stop me I think!

6. If I don't continue to lose weight for Steph's wedding, I am screwed. That dress still doesn't fit me. I'm down 6 pounds, but I really just wish I could afford liposuction. It's taking forever the hard way!

Now these 6 must be tagged. If you were already tagged, do it again and amuse. haha

1. Mimi
2. Annie
3. Milk and Honey
4. Add Humor and Faith
5. Rip Roarin and Runnin
6. Oh me oh my ...... and her wonderful men.

Oh and remember #1? Here's proof of me forgetting that I was tone deaf.


My Baby Broke Herself


Well, so far the week isn't ending like I thought it would. Tiger is out of town in Colorado. Missy was heading off last night to Michigan with my friends (I have to work all weekend, yuck). It was going to be More Than A Single Mom's BIG single weekend! I had lots of plans......dinners with my cousins on Friday, a girly movie and bubble bath all alone on Saturday, and studying in peace and quiet on Sunday. However, things never go as planned when you have children............

As we were packing the car for the girls to head to Michigan, my daughter and her friend were playing on the swing set. Didn't go so well. Missy fell and hit her face on the wooden pole of the swing set. Off to the ER we went. 2 stiches on the top. 1 stitch on the bottom.
By the way, I must say.......I am gonna be a damn good nurse. There was lots of blood. A LOT of blood. I was calm the whole time. I wish I could say the same about my friend, her daughter, and Missy. They were all crying. Whew. I am glad it's over.

I guess the girly movie and bubble bath will have to be put off...............

Wordless Wednesday - Fun With Wigs



This is my friend Steph. Her friends threw her a surprise birthday party and I got to meet lots of new people (good thing too cuz I am in her wedding and I didn't know anyone!). Anyway, we went to this surprise party. And at this party was wigs. Lots and lots of wigs. We had fun.


My First Birthday


(image) Holla! More Than A Single Mom turns 1 today! Seriously, check out my first blog entry ever. I was just taking a few minutes to look over some of my older posts. I just crack myself up sometimes. It's neat to look at it all. Kinda like a diary -- with pictures.

So Missy turned 7 yesterday. We went to Libby soon. My little girl is growing up so fast. Looking at her makes me want another baby. Baby fever for sure in this house. I can finally say that I really do miss her younger years. I thought they were hard back then during it all because I was young and single. Heck, that was the easy stuff. Bigger kids. Bigger Problems. She'll be a teenager after I blink it seems. A teenager. Yuck. The awkward stage of life. Ok, maybe I just freaked myself out enough to hold off that having another baby thing! Ha Ha........but really, just go back to being 2 Missy. I liked 2.

What your favorite age in your kids?

A Summer Update Through Pictures


I owe my blog lots of pictures. This is More Than A Single Mom's summer so far -- in a nut shell. What better way to say it than with pictures??First - There was summer fun in our backyard.......Then there was a camping trip.......Then there was 4th of July (my favorite holiday).........Remember that tooth? Well, it finally came out! Bottom tooth, hard to see.Last, but not least, Missy is turning 7! Happy birthday sweetie.[...]