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Maman des Filles

Surviving teenage girls!

Updated: 2018-03-05T14:46:54.289-06:00


My Cowardly Sister


An open letter to my sister who blogs under the name The Cranky Housewife: I knew that you would be a coward unable to handle anyone contradicting the illusion that you have created about yourself. Luckily, I saved my comment. Hopefully, Brittany from A Political Mind will see what you have blocked. If you are interested in reading my sister's demented screed please feel free to look her up at the cranky housewife. Be assured that she hates feminists, liberals, self-actualized humans and anyone who disagrees with her by using the most generic, disproven stereotypes that are thrown around by any git on Fox News. Example:Liberal feminists are typically loud mouthed complainers who want to have their cake, eat it too just as long as there are no trans fats… and they certainly won’t be baking that cake from scratch like some housewife or something. Just what kind of woman do you take them for?yeah. that's it. We liberal chicks don't love our families, cook or do laundry or do anything homespun-ny. And anyone who is read my blog, KNOWS that I am all about the modern conveniences and not lifting a finger... On the other hand, this is how she describes herself and those women like her:Any man who is married to a conservative feminist will tell you that his least favorite conversations ever start with the words, “Honey, I’m not happy about something.” Those husbands know full well that this one simple phrase is (like it or not) a call to action, and can quite literally change the world – one universe at a time. Once a conservative feminist gets a bee in her bonnet there will be no peace until her demands are met, and if that means changing the direction in which the planet Earth revolves around the sun in order to restore harmony... well, the sooner we get started working on that the happier we’ll all be. Ugh. Obviously the same nasty bully she has always been. My way or the highway. Margo has been the kind of gal that would use your feelings for her to get her own way. Don't want to see her in pain? Pay for that, bitch. One political blogger tried to use logic and reason with my batshit crazy sister and responded several times to Margo's craziness. Here is my response to her that naturally my sister deleted. Because she doesn't want facts interfering with what people think about her: Brittany, Don't waste your breath. My sister has always made up stories when facts don't exist. If you listen to what she writes you understand that "conservative feminism" is bullying people until you get your own way. She thinks that Puritans were first wave feminists! Not exactly the word that I would use to describe Mary Wollstonecraft assuming that Crankypants even knows who she is. (oops, I forgot, education and culture are wastes of time when one has laundry to do - truly the feminist mantra). Remember that her type is a bully and a user and will insult, lie, and use any institution that they can to get what they want. Let me tell you about an example. Picture a man and woman who spend several nights a week at the home of their daughter who just gave birth to triplets to watch over, feed and change the moppets over night so their daughter and son-in-law could sleep. Now imagine that when the boys reach their first birthday, that man and woman are told that they are terrible people and the woman is an alcoholic who is a danger to those children. In order to have contact with their grandchildren that man and woman would have to stop drinking, go to AA and then go into therapy. Imagine then the folks being told that the daughter's parish priest (who never met the folks) agreed that the folks were a danger to the daughter and her family. Now you might ask the question, "If the folks were so dangerous, why did the daughter allow her sweet boys to be thus endangered?" Ahh. The answer is: the daughter needed them. And when she didn't anymore? Well out to the trash with you. And I bet you aren't surprised to learn that the daughter in this story is my sister, the cranky housewife. Good Chri[...]

There You Are, My Pretty


Did you get lost?

or are you suffering from Stockholm Syndrome after a traumatic kidnapping.

You seem to be clean of eyeliner stains, but God knows how those girls abused you...

Come back to me. Don't be afraid. I will take care of you.

What Does This Picture Say?


(image) Yes, this is a dryer. My dryer.

What does this picture tell you?

Clothes are dried and someone has picked out the stuff they need and left the rest.

To me, that says, "This is mine. Clean up after me or wait until I decide I am done with it".

I find my dryer in this condition at least 4 days a week. Additionally, there are clothes on the floor of the laundry room (closet) and the lint trappings are on the floor as well, even though there is a garbage can.

Oh, and the caps are off the laundry detergents because

That is it. Just because.

I have asked that everyone in the house empty the washer and dryer when they are done and stop using it like a dresser.

This is the response I get.

Don't ask me why I am angry with you all the time. Your actions speak louder than your words. This is your world, and I am an annoyance. I get it.

Buggered Off


Yeah, I know that I haven't been posting much here. I have been busy and absorbed in bullpuckey.

But lately stuff has been weird. So I am posting.

You might have noticed this about me. But my stuff? It tends to bugger off. Go on walkabout. Piss off. Leave me.

Why? Apparently my stuff feels that I am not cool enough or it likes to be beaten up so it knows that it is loved. Cause, I will tell you I was much easier on my stuff than its new masters....

And by new masters, I presume it my stuff has left my employ without notice to hang with my much younger and much cooler daughters. The downside? Well, they are going to leave you dirty and stained with eyeliner and a foundation that belongs to a bi-racial woman and not my pale Irish-German-French lasses on the floor of an unkempt bathroom. When you return to me, you will be a dingy shadow of your former self and they will have moved on to newer, cleaner towel. Maybe one bought by their grandfather for his new girlfriend for their holiday visit.

So, my new fluffy towel? Return to your peg. Come back to me. I am offering you a long term relationship based on respect and admiration. I won't abuse you and call it love.

Come back.

Your place is waiting for you....

Morning Coffee


I don't drink coffee.

Yet, every morning I go through the coffee wars.

"Mom can we stop for coffee?" = "Mom, go buy me coffee"

Sometimes, I do. But not often because a. I was not put on earth to buy you shit. b. We have a coffee maker c. We have coffee, half and half, sugar, carmel sauce, chocolate sauce, etc. d. Get up earlier and make your own.

This morning Celia made herself coffee. Apparently she hasn't made the coffee with beans before.

"Mom! We have to stop for coffee. There is something wrong with the coffeemaker" I looked at the pot she held up of warm tan water. "Sorry babe, you must have forgotten to do something".

She did it all right. So, I went over to the machine and checked it. Yep. She put the beans in the coffee maker all right. But not in the grinder. She put them into the brewing basket. Better yet? The basket was filled to the brim for 4 cups of coffee. Oy! She ran the grinder without beans in it.

So I loaded it up the grinder and start the coffee.

Then the cup wars began. Yes, my teenagers fought over cups like they were toddlers and they both wanted the blue sippy cup.

Then they argued over who was the owner of the three day old sausage biscuit (my rule of thumb is that the day that the meal was served there might be some ownership claim, the next day? forget it. And the third day? STFU. It belongs to the person who puts it into the microwave. I am just grateful it isn't taking up space in the fridge).

I went to the car and waited.

I don't have the energy or patience. I haven't had my tea yet. Not that anyone cares.



As graduation approaches,

I am melancholy.

For what Sophie has lost

What I have lost

For not being able to speak my piece.

My heart is broken.

Personality tests


I heard about the Enneagram tests while listening to the Stuff Mom Never Told You podcast. I had never heard of it before... so naturally, I looked it up and took a quizzy thing.

What do you think? Does this sound like me?

Main Type
Overall Self
Take Free Enneagram Personality Test

Enneagram Test Results
Type 1 Perfectionism |||||||||||||| 58%
Type 2 Helpfulness |||||||||||||||| 66%
Type 3 Image Focus |||||||||||||||||| 78%
Type 4 Hypersensitivity |||||||||||||||| 70%
Type 5 Detachment |||||||||||| 42%
Type 6 Anxiety |||||||||||||||||| 74%
Type 7 Adventurousness |||||||||||||||| 66%
Type 8 Aggressiveness |||||||||||||||| 62%
Type 9 Calmness |||||||||| 38%
Your main type is 3
Your variant is sexual
Take Free Enneagram Personality Test

Mike Quigley On Rahm Emanuel For Chicago Mayor: 'This Is All Bulls***,' Daley Will Run Again


Hmmm, Good to see that Congressman Quigley has time to chat about hypotheticals instead of answering questions from his constituents.. i.e. Me.
Read the Article at HuffingtonPost

Tik Tok... Can This Song Be Over Already?


I am sick of this song and all the variations that I have been forced to listen to on B96...

This discussion of it, amused me to no end, even though I generally avoid anything to do with Princeton out of sheer UofC stubbornness... Still... Once again, I will be listening to this piece as Celia will be dancing to it tonight at her HS arts fest.

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From Green Roofs to Clean Tech: How Chicago Is Preparing for the Sustainable Future


And yes. We have recycling programs. The city is changing from the Old Blue Bag program to a new blue bin program. Sorry, it isn't moving fast enough for you. Luckily you can go ahead and produce wind to power the existing and future turbines in the City.

You certainly aren't a ray of sunshine to power the many City-installed solar arrays. Go visit some of your area museums and elementary schools. You will find them there. And before you shine a dark cloud on that program, please note that Chicago receives 90% of the insolation that Miami does so even solar power makes sense in Chicago.

If you DO want to help the environment of Chicago instead of just criticizing it, I suggest you encourage everyone you know to change the color their roof and using light reflective surfaces in lieu of blacktop. The dark colors change the solar radiation into thermal radiation and increase the temperature of the City by up to 15 degrees. This is called the Urban Heat Island Effect. And you can decrease it by the choices that you make in building materials. The City of Chicago even has a requirement for it in their Energy Code. We were the first city in the country to set a requirement.

But I am guessing that you weren't aware of that either.
About Climate Change
Read the Article at HuffingtonPost

From Green Roofs to Clean Tech: How Chicago Is Preparing for the Sustainable Future


Green roofs my arse? Maybe that is where you stuck your head.

Are you aware why we don't have as many turbine's as we would like.. and we DO have turbines in the city or haven't you seen the VAWT turbines at Lee Lumber which you can see from the Kennedy... Traditional turbines have a tendency to kill migratory birds which is a federal crime and they create disturbances with radio and television signals. Also there are plenty of people who freak out the possibility EMF, or didn't you read the story about the MD man who is suing his neighbor because she won't turn off her wireless router?

Additionally, I am guessing that you really don't understand that the phrase "Windy City" doesn't refer to the amount of wind from a meteorological stand point but rather the 'hot air' produced by its politicians. The potential for wind in Chicago it fair- good at best, if you have ever looked at wind map you would realize that. The best option would be from a wind farm located in Lake Michigan which is being argued against for the reasons that I have mentioned above, not to mention concerns about aesthetics, i.e. ruining the view.
About Climate Change
Read the Article at HuffingtonPost



Yes, I am happy that Glee is back... and this made me laugh... I have it with the original video so you can see the effort that they went to to make it accurate. Very glad that I didn't have to see Sue Sylvester's nipples.. that would have creeped me out a bit...

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Cousin Meme - Three Things


I got this from my cousin, Jackie....

She sent it to me by email, but I am responding via the internetz... 'cause that's how I roll...
Please don't break the cycle, it's fun to learn different things about our family and friends!

Three names I go by:

1. Gretchen

2. Mom

3. Maman

Three places I've lived:

1. Lockport

2. Chicago

3. Horseheads

Three places I've worked:

1. The Palace Theater

2. Haskell & Perrin

3. City of Chicago

Three things I love to watch:

1. Glee

2. The Big Bang Theory

3. The Rachel Maddow Show

Three places I have been:

1. London

2. Paris

3. Mt. Waialeale

Three people who email me regularly:

1. Sophie

2. Kevin

3. Buddy

Three things I love to eat:

1. Bison Chip Dip (luckily sold too far away for me to indulge)

2. Tuna salad

3. raspberries

Three people I think will respond:

1. Marguerite

2. maybe Kevin

3. Poppy?

Three things I am looking forward to: (in no particular order)

1. Not having to yell at anyone about chores or homework

2. Always knowing that my deodorant, brush and makeup can be found exactly where I left them

3. The revenge of grandchildren.

Now, here's what you're supposed to do....and please do not spoil the
fun. Hit forward, delete my answers and type in your answers. Then
send this to a few good friends or family INCLUDING the person who
sent it to you.

Love Me X's 3

Oh, Where Oh, Where Has Maman Been?


(image) I am not quite ready to tell the story yet.
Some of you know.... and I appreciate your support and love.

For the rest of you? I ask that you hang in there. I will say what I need to say eventually. I am waiting for the pain to lessen. Yes, I have been at a loss for words which is someone monumental in and of itself. Plus, I still keep thinking that I am stuck in a Kafka story.

The kids are more or less fine. Rocked a bit, but rolling with it... The same with Kevin. We are all healthy and safe.

As for the rest, I am sure when I finally settle myself down enough to write this out, you will think I made this story up. Trust me.

On a lighter note, I did go to Missouri to attend a teen volleyball tournament and while there I got to meet Busy Mom! So there is proof that life doesn't totally suck.

Limbaugh: I'll Leave US If Health Care Reform Passes (VIDEO)


I love a scenario with no downsides.... Adios and good luck, I am sure Costa Rican's will be thrilled to have you (wish I had a sarcasm key)
Read the Article at HuffingtonPost

GOP Rep: Blacks Worse Off Now Than Under Slavery (VIDEO)


I am going to guess that the droopy eye is from the stroke that wiped out his empathy center, common sense and moral compass....
Read the Article at HuffingtonPost




There is a long standing tradition that allows individuals to dig out the parking spot in front of their home and save it with assorted household junk.. This system is called "DIBS".

Is it childish? YES

Is it ridiculous? If you don't live in Chicago? YES!

Does it exist to this day? FUCK, YES!

Are there penalties for screwing with the system? You better fucking believe it. In my neighborhood? Slashed tires, not that anyone would dare remove a toddler bed to park.

I am posting some of my dibs pix. I love them. It is very Chicago which is my chosen home. But in all fairness? I warn you. I have a garage and don't need the spot in front of my house. But if you put garbage in front of my house? I am going to throw that shit out.

Well, while I appreciate tradition...

You can keep that crap in front of your own house.(image)

Nancy Elliott, Anti-Gay Lawmaker, Describes Anal Sex During Public Hearing: 'Wriggling' Around 'In Excrement'


Are the legislators sitting on either side of State Rep. Elliott so inured to her nuttiness that they can't even work up a look of surprise as she goes on and on....
Read the Article at HuffingtonPost

He's With That Kook!


moar funny pictures

You've got a video made by Qik VideoCamera


The attached video was created using Qik VideoCamera application for
the iPhone.

Sent from my iPhone

You've got a video made by Qik VideoCamera


The attached video was created using Qik VideoCamera application for
the iPhone.

Sent from my iPhone

What my view of the Superbowl will look like



But there will be no sound except the cheers of volleyball players

Views from the hood



Yes, that is the neighborhood monster truck

Keeping the stiffs in?