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Chaotic Family





Updated: 2015-12-09T12:09:25.764-08:00

 



Spring fabulous.

2015-04-05T23:04:53.263-07:00



This was a great day spent by all on Grandpa's boat seeing, Sea Lions, Seals, Eagles, Goats, many more... free living loving life animals.  We can't wait to come back in the summer to explore more.  I'm truly an Ocean girl at heart...  xo


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Hanging in...

2015-04-04T23:33:07.536-07:00

 The new teeth have been permanently cemented.  Which is exciting and terrifying all in one.  There are a few small changes I would like, so hopeful my dentist can make them now that they are secured in....  Not sure how well I actually do handle change as this has proved to be rather trying. Sigh~!

Happy Easter to all... xoxo



Welcome New Teeth, and Tired Eyes.

2015-03-04T23:58:35.322-08:00


Well it finally happened today. I was so nervous, excited and scared all in one. They look quite beautiful (certainly not a word I ever use to describe any part of me). It's so amazing what they have created and how real they truly look. I am sore, as we went without freezing, a little swollen, and slightly overwhelmed with emotion. So far so good. Certainly a few areas that may need some minor adjustments but the over all look is wonderful. Very glad we took the road less traveled. I'm going to treat myself... SHHHH - not gonna floss until Friday. I will be very dedicated to flossing but while my gums are still healing I just can't handle the pain. Hope everyone else had a fantastic Wednesday. Other then several other aspects of the day extremely failing, the teeth won!

  xo E








Tomorrow should be exciting...

2015-03-03T23:47:59.373-08:00

My dentist called today...  My new teeth have arrived and we are going to try and fit them tomorrow.  We will be putting them in temporarily to make sure they feel and fit right before we permanently cement them.  I am nervous.

Loosing 4 perfectly good teeth, just to support 2 teeth that don't exist is certainly a huge leap in faith.  It's so life changing for me.  I mourn the loss of my natural teeth that were healthy and stable. To have 4 of them shaved down to stubs was very difficult for me.  Having had these temporary teeth for the past month that aren't the best colour, shape, or fit has been so hard and at times I have wanted to hide and not leave the house.  Now I am about to get my "real" teeth.  As much as I have been looking forward to this moment I'm so scared. What if they aren't what I wanted, what if my smile is too different? Six of my top teeth will be man made and I just don't know how to process this.  I can't go back and change my mind - the other teeth have been altered now.  Had I gone the other route (dental implants) it would have required major surgery removing bone from my hip to put in my jaw and hope it took (it didn't when I was younger, so risky). But it would have been just 2 fake teeth, not 6.

I know my dentist has worked so hard to make these teeth the best ever. The entire office has seen me in some pretty low moments.  They have cried with me and hugged me when I needed, put up with my highly sensitive personality which really shows when I'm in a dental setting.  It just feels like I have already been through enough.  25+ surgeries in my life, most of them for my cleft lip and palate and teeth.  I'm really hoping these look wonderful and stay in place for a really long time.  Because my heart can't handle it if this doesn't work.

Thank you for reading if you have.  Venting makes this whole process so much easier.  Please do something kind for someone today.  Make them smile.  Maybe they will be sporting some nice new teeth.


xo
E



I won't let you go darling...

2015-03-01T22:59:13.253-08:00

This steady road of travel, has not been too kind.  Trying not to look back so it doesn't crumble down around me. It hasn't stopped raining and I'm still hanging on to this idea that at some point I will have some sort of permanent placement of teeth in my mouth.   Ya know, the only ones you'd call your own, the only ones you should be rightfully born with.  The teeth that give you the stability to function day to day and enjoy life like most "normal" people would.

This weeks words and phrases have been a good range of; special, unique, not-normal, abnormal, not what we were hoping would happen, the dental gods just aren't on your side, just to name a few. Pretty much to sum it all up... No one is like you.  You don't fit in.

People say they completely understand and want this to work out as much as I do... But they also say that whilst speaking to me with a jaw full of perfectly functioning teeth. SO!?

I'm not perfect, but I'm not my mistakes.  I think I've had enough.  Look at all I've been given.  So fortunate in so many ways.  The good out ways the bad.  But some damn teeth would be fan freaking tastic!

E



Teethless in Kelowna...

2015-02-28T00:06:56.822-08:00

Woke up with not a whole lot of anticipation that today was going to go as planned.  Headed straight for the dental chair to have my temporary teeth removed, a bit of reduction, on some surrounding teeth, which of course requires enough freezing for a small army of who's from who ville, then headed off to the specialist for the dreaded and nearly paralyzing and feared root canal.  Certainly one should explain that the stress and idea of having two root canals early on a Friday morning is much more a scary idea than anything else. Within 30 mins I had my CT scan, was damned up and off we went, drill, drill, deaden, switched sides, repeat and I was out the door and paying within 35 minutes start to finish.  Clearly my husband expected me to be longer so I with much impatience awaited his arrival.  This was going swimmingly.  So far the swelling was not to bad, the damage to my wallet was salvageable and I might actual get these famed "perfect teeth" in after only waiting a mere frigging month.  As I arrive at my dentist (who thinks I am a slight version of Kristen Bell - mood related only) the idea of these teeth actual entering my not so glamorous mouth starts to loom over my head.  Am I good enough for nice white, shiny, straight teeth.  Am I ready for the possible comments from others that I actually might have nice teeth... Not one to be very good at accepting any sort of compliment because the entire world must be lying to me.  I brace myself.  As I get back in the chair, I'm ready to take this responsibility on, for crying out loud, it's about frigging time.  Might I add there had been no tears today.  As I'm laying there I can sense the hesitation in Michael Buble's (my dentist) stillness.  His silence says more than his constant explanation of matters of the teeth.  So I say - OK It's not today...  He sighs, no not today.  Too good to be true.  Well if I'm about to get the GRILL of all GRILLS it better be well done.  To be continued.  As my yellowish, see through, ill fitting temps start to grow on me... A tiny little part of me would like it if they burst into flames the moment they came out of my assaulted and sore mouth.

I'm not bitter, just expressive...  There is a difference, and I'd hate to be judged solely on perhaps how I feel.
Happy Freaking Friday!



Looking for that non-biased, non-judgmental outlet..

2015-02-26T02:25:19.789-08:00

To be blunt... I have had a shit awful, no good crappy day... If I post it on Facebook I get the chronic miss-used LIKE button, to piss me off further. Instagram is fun, but my kids are on it, so they don't need to feel my stress. Twitter, is a great venting tool. Until you have so many of your FB followers on there it defeats it's own purpose. Why is it, that we can no longer have bad days without needing some sort of epic explanation or deeper meaning?

I went to the dentist. It went horribly. I sobbed like an idiot. I now need more work than expected. It's going to cost $2000 more than expected. And take longer than expected. Hopefully on Friday - things go as planned.

No miss-used-likes (it's not the confirmation to reading a status button), no judgement, no deeper meaning required. That is all. I needed to vent. I will survive. Tomorrow will be a new day to move forward.

Sending everyone or anyone who may read this... A lovely Thursday and the ability to share your thoughts without feeling the need to be guarded.

xo
E



Weekend

2012-11-03T20:32:12.580-07:00

Enjoying a quiet weekend at home with my little loves. Thursday having pretty major surgery. Nervous, excited, scared, not looking forward to recovery. Hope y'all have a fabulous weekend.



New Phone

2012-11-02T23:48:40.618-07:00

Wow. Just got a new phone and wanted to see if I could post via my phone. Pretty amazing :)

Here's a few Halloween photos for y'all



Colon checks....

2012-11-02T23:48:29.919-07:00

 
Can't believe 3 years ago this month my Dad was diagnosed with colorectal cancer.  Tomorrow or shall I say today - we go for his yearly colonoscopy.  I'm oddly chill about the whole thing.  Which is a far cry from his first one in 2009 - sadly I knew it was cancer - if we all re-call I had to give my Dad an ultimatum - either we go to the hospital or I take you kicking and screaming.  It was as though I was watching him die right in front of me.  Dr.'s were positive he just had blastocyst hominis a pathogenic parasite which may or may not have actually been true.  The amount of times he ran to the washroom, the grey colour of his skin, the exhaustion in his face.  You could tell it was far more sinister than a bloody parasite.  I begged and begged the ER Dr. to do something, so he gave us more antibiotics - exactly 7 days later once they were finished and he was no better, we went back.  This time I got my Dad to beg and beg the ER Dr. do a CT scan.  Finally he listened and they saw something "suspicious" in his abdomen - aka - the freaking giant tumour in his colon and swollen lymph nodes.  Instant colonoscopy and well these thing happen - f-that.  Cancer was a bad enough diagnosis - but things were changing, and rapidly - you could tell in the way he looked.  We were merely weeks away from this cancer being terminal.  Always listen to your inner intuition.  Thankfully I feel this colonoscopy is going to go much better.  Well I'm very hopeful. 



Can't sleep...

2012-10-28T01:41:21.792-07:00

 
Went to a Halloween party tonight.  Kids were excited to have a babysitter, and it was fun to have a few hours of adult time. 
 
Much to my surprise there was a big 7.7 magnitude earthquake in BC - so of course now I'm glued to the news. 
 
So happy tomorrow or shall I say today is Sunday.  Going to spend the day at home with the kids.  Hope everyone stays safe.



I miss Summer...

2012-10-24T11:46:58.938-07:00


 
Seems like we didn't even really have a Fall.  It went from beautiful sunny weather, to a few falling leaves and now it's freaking cold. 
 
The Winters are so long here and living in a valley sometimes you don't see the sun for days.  Might inspire me to plan another trip - lol - just gotta save some money first. 




Is this thing on?

2012-10-23T23:20:25.175-07:00



Oh how I waiver with blogging.  I love to share my feelings, but sometimes I feel like the news I have to share is not always fun...  and no one wants to hear boring old health stuff all the time.  Let's face it - if you have followed me from the start you know we have pretty much tackled most health issues between, Me, my parents, and the kids.
 
Things are currently doing quite well.   My handsome dude is doing really well in - cough cough Grade 5 - wow time flies.  He has not had a fever, a rash on his face, or protenuria in so long - thank-goodness.  My baby girl is loving Grade 2 - we all know the hopes for her loving school weren't high, given her lack of interest during Kindergarten.  We are so thankful that all of her health issues are starting to be a thing of the past.  Pediatrician check up for them both in November - I know it will be one of their best ones yet.  
 
My husband is doing really well in his new career and is coming up on his 2 year anniversary in a few months.  We were so fortunate to not have to move. 
 
My parents - lol - are crazy as ever, which is a good thing.  Mom's brain tumor is still growing, but it's safer to keep it in for now.  We watch n wait but they are planning a fun trip this Winter.  Dad is doing so well - some neuropathy still but hey - we will take that - his 3rd anniversary for remission is approaching - so fingers crossed his next colonoscopy goes well.  NO RED JELLO DAD!
 
I am flying by the seat of my pants, like always.  Big surgery for me coming up - and no it's not for my dental implants.  It will be good to be done and I'm looking forward to having a great Winter/Spring.
 
Hope you are all well, if you still swing by that is. ;P
 
 



Congrats Hedley

2012-04-01T16:26:24.305-07:00

One of my fave Canadian bands, congrats on Pop Album of the year... Check them out.





Pluto pal!

2012-03-29T22:13:14.843-07:00

(image) Two weeks in Disneyland, almost a week home and I'm still catching up.


There were 12 of us all together that went. For the first 10 days 8 of us, then 12 for a few then another 8 of us for the last few days.


We did Disneyland, Knotts Berry, Legoland, the Beach, Target (not here in Canada yet) and lot's of fun things. I'm exhausted. I'm now dreaming of our next vacation which I feel should be Hawaii - give me a few years to save. ;P


More photos to come - once I get this new photo format figured out. Hope everyone has had a good week.



Having some photo issues...

2012-03-29T22:12:24.422-07:00

(image) Picasa has changed and I can no longer up-load photos straight from picasa onto my blog...

It may take me a day or so to figure this out. For now here is a photo of my little darlings meeting one of our faves - Mickey Mouse.


Hope everyone found their silver lining's today.

xo E






Colon Cancer Will Never Win...

2012-03-29T22:11:03.880-07:00

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Tough night in blog land... My heart is so sad to hear that this month alone 4 courageous and strong women have passed on from colon cancer way to soon.

Carole, your words were so kind despite all you were going through - keeping your family in my thoughts.

Becca, 24 at diagnosis and 31 at passing - hope your finally in peace.

Emily, recently married, just turned 30 and so full of life - hope it continues in heaven for you.

Emily - age 41 - fighting since 2007 - please rest in peace.

In honour of these women, and of colon cancer awareness month - please - make getting checked a priority.




We are home sweet home...

2012-03-24T23:54:28.740-07:00

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Photos and update to come...  We are home safe and sound though. xo E



I was off to a good start...

2012-03-08T01:02:46.867-08:00

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I'm usually so prepared and excited for trips that I'm packed 2-3 weeks prior.  I was almost all packed and then last week, was just so hard, I froze.  Starting to get my stuff together better, and finally, finally finally did my usual fun itinerary for us all.  My stomach has got all the pre-flying nerves, sickness and churning.  Of course I'm not able to sleep.  My heart is just still very sad about my dear friend.

She has made some progress, and her sweet lil girl has as well, but prayers are still needed.
.
Another difficult part is that my parents were supposed to be joining us on this trip - but - my Mom's brain tumour decided to be stupid and she can't travel. :( 

As sad as I am and as hard as this is...  My family is so precious and we need this time to refresh, relax and have some fun.  That's ok right?!?



Overwhealmed is an understatement...

2012-03-04T08:39:24.754-08:00

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This week has been terrible, I haven't cried this much in a long time.

Thursday my Mom had minor surgery, she is doing fine.

Thursday night I got a call that one of my dear friends was in a horrific car accident with her husband and daughter. My friend and her daughter were seriously injured and it's truly heartbreaking. The extent of their injuries is endless and I'm just thankful right now that they are both alive. Currently my friend is on life support, and her daughter is in a drug induced coma. This has been very hush hush, since they have two other children who were not involved in the crash and it's been hard to keep it together around some people. Since I found out I haven't stopped crying, I feel helpless. Please keep them in your thoughts.

Then of course right before we are to go away it's time for my Dad to have another CT scan, he goes in tomorrow and I'm terribly nervous. I feel that bad news travels in groups and since his last scan wasn't stellar I'm not feeling so confident about this one.

All I want to do is crawl in bed and hide... We leave for our vacation in 6 sleeps and although I will paint a smile on my face and go, I am having a hard time being excited when it seems so trivial in comparison to all the other things going on.




AHHHH!

2012-02-28T22:11:07.722-08:00

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Only 11 more sleeps until our vacation and I can't find the charger for my camera... Yes we have another camera. But this one is my baby! Please hope for me that I can find the charger before our trip. Today I tore the house apart, will be putting it back together tomorrow, it has to be somewhere it doesn't have legs - or does it?



Happy Valentine's Day

2012-02-14T00:08:41.577-08:00



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From myself, and my two sweetest little valentine's I hope that everyone finds a little bit of love in their day.



Chop, Chop...

2012-02-07T23:40:08.828-08:00

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You can tell he's growing, when he is begging for a haircut... Thankfully Daddy has that one covered.



Fast Weekend...

2012-02-05T19:52:08.490-08:00

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This has been a seriously busy week... It feels in the past 7 days there hasn't been one quiet day. And here we are again about to start another week. Thankfully this next one is less busy. Sorry for the lack of posting, I just haven't had the time to sit down or stop. Between 3 birthday parties, 3 hours of drum lessons, 2 hours of dance (normally I only handle the first hour), volunteering at the school, re-doing my closet, having my niece over for a sleepover, cleaning the office, labelling all my clothes for consignment, dropping them off, taking the rest to the salvation army, etc.. SIGH - can I go relax now?



In her words I'm a...

2012-01-24T22:52:47.204-08:00

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Tough Cookie...

Had my 6 month dermatology appt today... Since I've had several pre-cancerous spots I'm not taking any chances...

All was good, but I have this "spot" - "mole" whatever you call it on my leg that I kept cutting off whenever I shaved my legs. No matter how hard I tried to avoid it I always would knick it. Each time it would get just a little bit bigger or bleed a little bit more...

To my shocking surprise the dermatologist offered to blast it off. As I waited for the usual blue can of spray (which didn't happen), she told me to lie down and brace myself. She then whipped out this laser with a giant scalpel attached to it and chopped the thing off. Another surprise it didn't hurt, which seemed to really shock the dermatologist who told me everyone screams in pain and flinches. Yay me... It's throbbing now - lol!