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Angry for a Reason

A place to vent my frustrations about living in a effed up white male dominated, ableist, capitalistic society. And if you're mean, misogynistic, or in any other way effed up I will delete you. And yes, it is at my discretion. Whine about it elsewhere.

Updated: 2017-09-06T00:46:22.661-07:00


Ongoing submission acceptance for Don't Dis My Ability #2


I am putting together a print-zine about living with disabilities.  It is called Don't DIS My Ability and will be the second issue.  The only requirement is that the author/artist have a disability.  The publication date has not been set yet as Issue #1 has just been published, though I will let all submitters know when I plan to publish it (target date in appx 6-8 months which puts us around January - March 2013).

All people who get published will get a copy free! Send me your pictures, poems, essays, 1st hand accounts, critical analyses, etc.

email: dont dis my ability AT riseup DOT net

**EDIT:** I will be using the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs License, which means they have to attribute you, can't use it for commercial endeavours, and have to use it as is (no derivations). If you want a different copyright let me know.

I do not plan to make any money. I hope to recoup printing costs, but it will be for sale at info shops for as cheap as possible (I am going to be shipping it all over the US, England, Australia, New Zealand, and Canada too).

Don't Dis My Ability Zine Update


Even though the infoshop basically guaranteed they’ll be carrying don’t dis my ability, they still need to have a collective meeting about it and they didn’t have one last week so I have to wait another week to find out if they’ll carry our (yes our, because so many people contributed to it) zine or not.  ARGH
By the way if you want your own very own copy cost (all inclusive - s&h, copy costs, etc) is
$4 US
$6 Canada
$8 international
email dontdismyability AT riseup DOT net



Disability Zine nitty gritty42 pages of awesome (plus cover)Images by basiL, billie rain, Jessie, Leslie Balch & Sasha Smithy, Amy @, & Sadie SickoPOEMS:Helium by Kristin Allen-ZitoArt Viewing by JessieUntitled by TroubleARTICLES:Spoon Theory by Christine MiseradinoHandicap Nazi by Christy Leigh StewartApplying for Disability by TroubleNo pause, no break, no end by MeeresbandeDisability in the Movement: Including the Invisible by Comrade CanaryAccessible Design by Paula BergmanAcquiring a Service Dog in the USA by Morgan at unheardofsongs.tumblr.comIt’s Not You, It’s Them by Michele KaplanA Dog with PTSD saves an owner with PTSD by BurrowMaking Spaces Accessible to People with Invisible Disabilities collected and edited by BurrowLook for it at your local info shop (now becomes that very tricky trying to stretch my disability cheque so that I can print off and post at least 1 per info shop in N. America to see if they want to order them or not)$3 to the US, $4 to Canada and $6 international.  Prices are all inclusive (printing, buying postage & mailing packets)Email dontdismyability AT riseup DOT netLARGE PRINT FORMAT (i.e. FULL SHEET ENLARGED TEXT) AVAILABLE.  Please let me know what font size you would like.A blog made by a disillusioned clown living in the Cascadia Free state. Mostly centering on calling out misogyny in this society and worldwide, but also with radical unionism and notes on the problems with living in the US. (i.e. Radical)[...]

My new blog


Can be found here:

I'll still post here from time to time, but I'm really active over there.

Disability Zine Callout for Submissions: I WANNA HEAR FROM YOU!


I am doing a callout for submissions! DUE APRIL 30TH! PUBLICATION MAY 15TH! (though late submissions are OK, just tell me if you're writing something so I know to hold it for you).

I am putting together a print-zine about disabilities and the activist community. Your post can be about anything related to that topic, whether it has to do with your identity as an Activist with a disability or difficulties fitting into your chosen activist scene (e.g. Earth First!) as an Activist with a disability.

Though it is activist scene leaning this doesn't mean that other submissions aren't welcome. I actually have submissions on general stuff too so PLEASE EMAIL ME YOUR SUBMISSIONS! I want something EPIC!

Possible topics:

Did you come to activism through your disability?

Does your disability make it harder for you to be taken seriously by people in your community?

Do you feel you have to teach people what life is like in your shoes?

Do you feel that you are by default a disability Rights activist?

From the peanut gallery:

What are ways that people can make spaces more accessible to people with disabilities?

How can we make spaces accessible to both invisible and visible disabilities at the same time?

What are the different accommodations needed for different disabilities?

How do we handle Service Dogs?

Nitty gritty: DUE APRIL 30th, Publication May 15th. All people who get published will get a copy or two free! Send me your pictures, poems, essays, 1st hand accounts, critical analyses, etc.

email: dont dis my ability AT riseup DOT net

**EDIT:** I will be using the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs License, which means they have to attribute you, can't use it for commercial endeavours, and have to use it as is (no derivations). If you want a different copyright let me know.

I do not plan to make any money. I hope to recoup printing costs, but it will be for sale at info shops for as cheap as possible (I am going to be shipping it all over the US and Canada too).

Need help: ROUGH DRAFT Making spaces accessible to people with invisible disabilities


Making spaces accessible to people with invisible disabilities:While others have covered making spaces accessible to people with physical disabilities, I want to tackle the invisible ones.  Many people in our society live with invisible disabilities.  In the US alone it is estimated that 10% of people are living with an invisible disability and 96% of people with a chronic illness are living with a disability.  This means that more then likely you know someone who has one.Examples are, but are not limited to: ADHDAnxiety disordersArachnoiditisAsperger SyndromeAutismBipolar disorderBrain injuriesCharcot-Marie-Tooth diseaseChronic fatigue syndromeChronic painCircadian rhythm sleep disordersCoeliac DiseaseCrohn's diseaseFibromyalgiaDiabetesLupusEpilepsy Major depressionMetabolic syndromeMultiple SclerosisMultiple Chemical SensitivityNarcolepsyPersonality disordersPrimary immunodeficiencyPsychiatric disabilitiesReflex Sympathetic DystrophyRepetitive stress injuriesRheumatoid arthritisSchizophreniaSclerodermaSjögren's syndromeTemporomandibular joint disorderTransverse MyelitisUlcerative Colitis. Let’s start with the easy stuff:Do not judge people by their disability.  We are not our illness.Have seating available.  I have been to so many activist meetings that have “floor only” seating and on a “first come first served” basis.  Have chairs available, and a variety from hard surfaces to cushy ones and make sure people know that they’re not “first come first served,” but that they are reserved for people who need them.  People with chronic pain may need a cushy chair and people with other conditions may need a hard backed chair or else they may not be able to get back up again.  Sitting on the ground and being able to stand back up is a luxury, never forget that.Watch your words.  Describing things as “schizo,” “psycho,” or “bipolar” are not cool (for example, there are a ton of words you can use that slur the disabled but they are too many to mention – if you think it can offend DON’T USE IT).  I just heard someone describe the weather we were having as “bipolar.” DO NOT DO THAT.  That is screwed up beyond belief and reinforces the stigma against people with mental health issues. Do not refer to anyone as a “crip,” “gimp,” “wheels,” or “blink,” etc. even if they do themselves and definitely don’t use that to describe them to anyone else.Don’t ask stupid questions. This kind of goes hand in hand with the above, but ffs DO NOT ask someone personal questions about their disability.  If someone wants to share their life they will, but DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES DO THE FOLLOWING AND CALL PEOPLE OUT WHO SAY THIS:- ask someone how they “got” their illness- tell someone with a mental health disability that they can “snap out of it”- ask people if they’ve tried X remedy instead of medications, chances are they have- ask anyone with PTSD what their traumatic experience(s) was (were)- at any point talk to them in a patronizing manner- act like you know what it’s like to have a mental health disability b/c you (and this is a real example) “felt depressed once too”- act like you are an expert at their disability b/c you read up on it- DO NOT ASK US PERSONAL QUESTIONS.  WE ARE NOT PUBLIC PROPERTY.  NOTHING makes this OK.  Not “If you don’t mind me asking,” etc.  If we wish to share this information we will, but invasive questions from strangers are not welcome.- Don’t yell.  Some people are very sensitive to loud noises and it can trigger others.- Do not stand behind people – this can be very triggering.This list is not exhaustive.  Again you should use your judgment.  If you are unsure DO NOT DO IT: it is probably rude.Be aware of touching.  You may think that tapping someone on the sh[...]

Disability Carnival NOW UP at Not My Disease!


Disability Blog CARNIVAL # 82 which is titled FIRSTS
Read all about people's 1sts there!



If you have a twitter account please go to #ididnotreport. There is also a sister hashtag #ididreport that kind of explains why there are so many stories on #ididnotreport. I have to say there is a strong TRIGGER WARNING for sexual assault, harassment, abuse and domestic violence. These are women giving reasons why they did not report their assaults. It can be overwhelming and devastating. I, myself, have given over 25 #ididnotreports. It's both cathartic and depressing for me how easily it flows from me.

People are also keeping an archive of it here for those of you without a twitter account. It hasn't been updated tonight, but I'm sure they'll get on that when they awaken.

What is your definition of (dis)Ability?


This debate has come up in forum I am a member in. People say that severe food allergies should count - I'm saying no. As a sufferer of a severe food allergy and a person with a (dis)ABility (several in fact) I call foul.

Your thoughts?

(dis)Ability Zine CALLOUT!


I am doing a callout for submissions! DUE APRIL 30TH! PUBLICATION MAY 15TH!

I am putting together a print-zine about (dis)Abilities and the activist community. Your post can be about anything related to that topic, whether it has to do with your identity as an Activist with a (dis)Ability or difficulties fitting into your chosen activist scene (e.g. Earth First!) as an Activist with a (dis)Ability.

Possible topics:
Did you come to activism through your (dis)Ability?
Does your (dis)Ability make it harder for you to be taken seriously by people in your community?
Do you feel you have to teach people what life is like in your shoes?
Do you feel that you are by default a (dis)Ability Rights activist?

From the peanut gallery:
What are ways that people can make spaces more accessible to people with (dis)Abilities?
How can we make spaces accessible to both invisible and visible disabilities at the same time?
What are the different accommodations needed for different (dis)Abilities?
How do we handle Service Dogs?

Nitty gritty: DUE APRIL 30th, Publication May 15th. All people who get published will get a copy or two free! Proceeds will go to a (to be voted on) (dis)Ability Right's Activist group! Send me your pictures, poems, essays, 1st hand accounts, critical analyses, etc BY APRIL 15th! I want this out on MAY DAY!

dont dis my ability AT riseup DOT net

Reproductive rights quick hit



Women's Studies and Science


Took me awhile, but here it is:I wrote a long time ago about my entry into Physics/Math from women's studies. (Read all about it here)It Begins: I need to preface this with stating that I have been to a plethora of colleges, the majority of which were art and design schools with one liberal arts school before I came to my current university. I was admitted to the hippie college because I wanted to create a concentration in Media, Women's, and Labour studies, which was my life for the years that passed between colleges. I had no idea I would throw off my intended concentration for mathematics, but one person made me dream of a future filled with equations.It inspired a post by Zuska (an engineer), after it showed up in Scientiae, a blog carnival for women scientists.Is Women's Studies Good for Science?This is indeed a wonderful tale to read. What is heartening to me here is to see women's studies acting in concert with support for women in science - not just focusing on theoretical critiques of science and engineering, but actually aiding in the mentoring of a woman into science. When I was a graduate student at Duke University, women's studies played a vital role in helping me finish my PhD. The director, Jean O'Barr, and the members of my women's studies reading group all encouraged me. They advised me how to deal with the knucklehead professor in my department who was on a vendetta to drive out all the women; consoled me after a grueling 4.5 hour preliminary exam; and just provided a general network of support.How discouraging, then, how depressing, to receive the latest newsletter from women's studies at Duke, and read the tale of not one, but FOUR women who talk of leaving science to major in women's studies! To make matters worse, we hear the following from one of the students:After my first class, I knew that Women's Studies was about more than just the history of women, which common perceptions indicate; it is rich and bursting with theoretical questions, with competing analyses about society, with vibrant accounts of identity. Unlike engineering, where I only used my mathematical, scientific side, Women's Studies gives me the opportunity to think both abstractly and concretely, with one foot in an academic discussion and one in the realities of everyday life.Now I use all of my brain all of the time. I even was talked into going into Physics by combining women's studies AND physics. Behold: Nancy Swanson (my prof) and I had many discussions about me going into a scientific field; I was still concerned about leaving a possible career in women's studies for one in science, she told me about how I could work for the National Science Foundation (NSF) and work to enact policies that ensure that girls and women were getting the same access to mathematics and science that boys and men have, and ones that could encourage girls to go into the fields of science, technology, engineering, and mathematics (STEM). She talked to me about ways in which I could incorporate my work in feminism with science.And today I am first author on a paper that is about to be resubmitted (with the minor revisions finished) that is all about closing the gender gap in introductory physics using practices called "Wise Schooling" in the field of Educational Psychology. I can't talk about it much now, but after the paper gets published will I be talking about it then! You Betcha! (Also we're doing a workshop on it at this summer's American Association of Physics Teachers Conference in Philly, PA so WHEEEEEEEEEE!)A blog made by a disillusioned clown living in the Cascadia Free state. Mostly centering on calling out misogyny in this society and worldwide, but also with radical unionism and notes on the problems with living in the US. (i.e. Radical[...]

Testing One, Two....


You may have noticed that I have a blogroll again, but there are some very near and dear to me people missing. Mainly science geeks that I adore, so if you would please comment here with your blog so that I can add it to my blogroll. (First I must get rid of all the f*cking spam I have collected.)

I'm looking at you lovely math blogger in TN, among others.

ALSO: If you are a male blogger that I used to read/keep in touch with and are a science geek or radical I especially have no way of getting in touch with you b/c I've been trolling Scientiae and rad fem blogs for links. LEAVE YOUR INFO HERE so I can add you. I'm thinking of some "SYTYCD" fans!

Remember them


  • Geneviève Bergeron (born 1968), civil engineering student
  • Hélène Colgan (born 1966), mechanical engineering student
  • Nathalie Croteau (born 1966), mechanical engineering student
  • Barbara Daigneault (born 1967), mechanical engineering student
  • Anne-Marie Edward (born 1968), chemical engineering student
  • Maud Haviernick (born 1960), materials engineering student
  • Maryse Laganière (born 1964), budget clerk in the École Polytechnique's finance department
  • Maryse Leclair (born 1966), materials engineering student
  • Anne-Marie Lemay (born 1967), mechanical engineering student
  • Sonia Pelletier (born 1961), mechanical engineering student
  • Michèle Richard (born 1968), materials engineering student
  • Annie St-Arneault (born 1966), mechanical engineering student
  • Annie Turcotte (born 1969), materials engineering student
  • Barbara Klucznik-Widajewicz (born 1958), nursing student

Died December 6th, 1989



So Canada voted in a Conservative Majority despite what would be best for the country so I went to drown my sorrows in one of the two bars I frequent in town. Upon arrival I was told that I had to go outside because my dog was not allowed. I tried explaining that she was a service dog, even producing her papers which were pushed aside and not even glanced at, and firmly told that it didn't matter that they can refuse service to anyone. I asked if they would say the same if I were blind to which they replied again "we can refuse service to anyone."

Having already bought a drink I went outside, but I went back in to ask when I could speak to the owner. They said I could speak to the manager tomorrow at 4. I plan to and if he does not understand the law I am contacting the state disability board and a civil rights lawyer. I have been to this bar many times with Sadie and do not understand why this time was a problem. To top it off there was another, non-service dog in the bar, but apparently that dog is a-ok (he said it's the only dog allowed in the bar).

Yes I cried. To deny my dog is to deny me. I may not have a visual disability, but I have one and I require a service dog to function "normally." To deny me a service because I require outside assistance is just as bad as not having a ramp for wheelchairs. So fark you Overtime in Clemson, SC. I'm going to fight for my right to frequent you then you can kiss my white butt because you will never get my business again.



This post is brought to you by the anxiety attack that the Super PTSD dog Sadie interrupted last night. So I am obviously still training my dog, but her medical training is all complete. She does amazing things for me (listed below), now if only I could get her to do the "little" things. LOL. She's a perfect example of a service dog, walking with me, sitting next to me, doing her medical duties, etc. But when not wearing her vest she doesn't always listen. *sigh* We're working on that. I felt as though I should share her story with you as I love sharing her story. From scared abused dog who had to be carried into the yard to go to the bathroom to dog who walks proudly around campus when she has her vest on (without her vest I doubt she would). She is a 3 year old abuse rescue American Pit Bull Terrier. Because she has PTSD and her momma has PTSD we got her a patch for her vest that says "PTSD DOG." :D Surprisingly I don't mind telling people that yes I do have PTSD, but I do get persnickity when they ask me how I got it. The patch on top of her back says "Service dog access required." I originally just rescued her because I knew what an abused dog needed and I love pitties. But when she interrupted my first anxiety attack I knew that she may be able to help me in other ways with my PTSD/Bipolar/Depression. Here's what she did during my first and subsequent anxiety attacks: if I'm sitting or lying down she'll put her paws on my chest and paw at me until I make eye contact with her and start interacting with her. This brings me back to the present and out of whatever hell hole of the past I am stuck in. If I'm standing she paws at my legs and stands on her hind legs leaning on me (which she has been trained not to do) until again I start to interact with her - not just brush her off, but really solidly connect and interact with her. She knows when I'm about to have an anxiety attack (I don't know how, but she does) and she knows when I'm just going through the motions of interacting with her and when I'm really connecting with her and being pulled out of my head. Since I realised she could do this, she has been taught to bark when it's time to take my meds, she nudges me in bed in the morning when my alarm goes off to get me to get out of bed at least to walk her which usually prevents me from staying in bed all day, and she comes out with me in public (we're still working on socialisation - that part takes about 6 months and she's strides ahead of where an abused dog should be, I've only had her since August). I feel like I can go so many more places now - I'm not scared to go out in public. I ***HIGHLY*** recommend a service dog for people with PTSD. Here's a story of a PTSD dog. Let's just say I see my Sadie in there.UPDATE: Here's Sadie's story on And here's her complete background since she was rescued. P.S. We went to the American Bully Kennel Club show on January 29th in Tampa. It was so fun being around all those pit bulls and pit bull lovers! Plus SADIE WON 1ST PLACE FOR BEST RESCUE:I don't know what I'd do without her - she makes my life so much more liveable.A blog made by a disillusioned clown living in the Cascadia Free state. Mostly centering on calling out misogyny in this society and worldwide, but also with radical unionism and notes on the problems with living in the US. (i.e. Radical)[...]

Sea of Green


Day 5 and indeed the protest is picking up steam. People have asked me, since I have friends in Tehran who (surprise, surprise) are highly political and were around for the 79 revolution if this protest is different then the last round in 99 which eventually fizzled. Indeed it is. It is not just students and it is not just the highly educated. It is spreading to everyone. Women in Chadors join Iran's opposition.Boorghani is typical of the young reformists who initially backed Mousavi — but that support is growing to include grandmothers, government employees and hotel clerks.The last time Iran was engulfed in similar anti-government action was a decade ago when a deadly raid on a Tehran University dorm sparked six days of nationwide protests. At the time, they were considered the worst since the 1979 revolution that toppled the pro-U.S. shah and brought hard-line clerics to power. But the student-driven movement eventually fizzled, leaving many people more bitter but the system intact.This time, though, the protesters are not just affluent students and youth. The middle class is also flooding the streets and even conservative religious Iranians are joining the Mousavi supporters........"This (the Mousavi opposition) is completely different to 1999. That was between the students and the government. This is between the people and the government. This time it is all of Iran. This is a historic movement," Boorghani said.Today at 4pm Tehran time there will be a silent march in honour of all the fallen protesters of the uprising. (That link gets updated with names as they become available. Dead bodies are taken from hospitals and thrown into the back of trucks and driven away before names can be taken so there are many unknown.)A letter from an Iranian medical student: Hello,It’s painful to watch what’s happening.I don’t want anything to do with what has been said this far, as I neither have the strength nor the resilience to face all these unfathomable events.I only want to speak about what I have witnessed. I am a medical student. There was chaos last night at the trauma section in one of our main hospitals. Although by decree, all riot-related injuries were supposed to be sent to military hospitals, all other hospitals were filled to the rim. Last night, nine people died at our hospital and another 28 had gunshot wounds. All hospital employees were crying till dawn. They (government) removed the dead bodies on back of trucks, before we were even able to get their names or other information. What can you even say to the people who don’t even respect the dead. No one was allowed to speak to the wounded or get any information from them. This morning the faculty and the students protested by gathering at the lobby of the hospital where they were confronted by plain cloths anti-riot militia, who in turn closed off the hospital and imprisoned the staff. The extent of injuries are so grave, that despite being one of the most staffed emergency rooms, they’ve asked everyone to stay and help–I’m sure it will even be worst tonight.What can anyone say in face of all these atrocities? What can you say to the family of the 13 year old boy who died from gunshots and whose dead body then disappeared?This issue is not about cheating(election) anymore. This is not about stealing votes anymore. The issue is about a vast injustice inflected on the people. They’ve put a baton in the hand of every 13-14 year old to smash the faces of “the bunches who are less than dirt” (government is calling the people who are uprising dried-up torn and weeds) .This is what sickens me from dealing with t[...]

This blog has gone green for Iran


So everyone should be aware that the protests in Iran are not stopping and in fact in many ways have picked up steam. At the protests on the 15th flyers were being circulated with a list of demands:7 point statement distributed among the protesters in Tehran today:Dismissal of Khamenei for not being a fair leaderDismissal of Ahmadinejad for his illegal actsTemporary appointment of Ayatollah Montazeri as the Supreme LeaderRecognition of Mousavi as the PresidentForming the Cabinet by Mousavi to prepare for revising the Constitutionunconditional and immediate release of all political prisonersDissolution of all organs of repression, public or secretAyatollah Montazeri has released a statement saying that no sane person should accept these results. There have been several reports from trusted sources that the night before Ahmadinejad's victory announcement Mousavi was called and told that he had won with a 57% majority. Translation: "We write Mousavi, they read Ahmadinejad" All sorts of communication: SMS, cell phones, texts, internet (twitter & facebook & the like), etc, are all being blocked by the Iranian government. They are also searching for the IP addresses and locations of twitterers and bloggers. If you want to help by setting up a proxy go here for instructions in Windows and a link to instructions for Linux, and here for instructions for Macs. There's instructions to get your IP info to people tweeting/blogging from Iran. I used mine for my friends I met there when I visited way back in the 90s. Whoever they share it with I trust. If you do this do not publish it anywhere public. Also if you are on Twitter please change your location to Tehran and your local time to GMT +03:30. Flood them with targets to hide the actual twitterers.To follow on twitter the hashtags are #iranelection (which we know is being monitored so be careful - don't RT using the names of any Iranian tweeters), and #gr88 (which we should assume is being monitored as well). I recommend following @persiankiwi as well.Best of Tweets live round-upLive-blogging the Uprising (huffpo) Best place to find videos and stuffA comprehensive breakdown of the current situation in Iran including timelinePictures showing that candidates lost votes as the day went onWhy We Links for rallies around the world, info, etc.Rally in TehranAlso people are pressuring Google to follow in the BBC's footsteps and go green in support of the protesting Iranians. Do what you can. If I have anything that I think is not publicised well enough I will post it here.Protesters take on the police:(now this is what you do. They were outnumbered, but they didn't let a few police stop them.)Wear Green, show your support. The BBC went green (for some reason they have since reverted).WARNING: This is a video of a man being beaten by the police.Hopefully the genie is out of the bottle and the revolution and overthrow of Ayatollah Khomeni and his religious thugs will occur. To everyone in Iran: stay safe. To my friends in Iran who will probably not get to read this: you are constantly in my thoughts and in my heart I am there standing by your side on those streets.A blog made by a disillusioned clown living in the Cascadia Free state. Mostly centering on calling out misogyny in this society and worldwide, but also with radical unionism and notes on the problems with living in the US. (i.e. Radical)[...]

I'll be back soon, but in the meantime


All you British Colombians:


You need to vote on May 12th. First off, Campbell's an ass whose very image induces a blind rage in me, but even if you're not interested in that, we need you to VOTE YES ON STV!

Here's some propaganda:
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See you all soon - APS meeting this weekend, and I'm printing the poster Tuesday (the day you should all be voting) so I'll have that time stuff.

They'd never show that this side of the pond


Keira Knightley's Domestic Violence PSA (it may be triggering)

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Got my first acceptance letter


It's from Clemson University. WOO WOO.

Still waiting to hear back from my first and second choices: SUNY Stonybrook and UH Manoa.

Also starting in on crunch time for my research. The APS meeting is the weekend of May 12th/13th and I will be presenting then. I've got some great stuff about how to improve teaching methods and retention rates for women in STEM from various studies and C.M. Steeles' work on stereotype threat. More on this later.

A little late, but here's something for Int'l Women's Day


I wrote it as an assignment for a math history class. I could have kept writing. Sophie Germain ROCKS! (and it's written for non-math people to read so if you want to read about a brilliant woman from Revolutionary France here you go!)Sophie Germain – Revolutionary Mathematician The streets of Paris were bustling with people. Marie-Madeleine Gruguelin was on an outing to the market with and her two oldest daughters, Marie-Madeleine and Marie-Sophie (just “Sophie” to avoid confusion with all the other Maries in the house) were on an outing to the market. Marie-Madeleine was reticent about taking the girls out, as the air was electric. There had been bread riots occurring with more frequency lately, the King was bankrupt, and the Estates Général had been called for the first time in a hundred and fifty years. Her husband, Ambroise-Francois Germain was asked to serve in the Estates Général, a group composed of what were called the three estates: the clergy, the 1st estate, the nobility, the 2nd estate, and the middle class, which included her husband, the 3rd estate. Everywhere people were writing pamphlets and petitions on their plights to the King. Many were unhappy with what they perceived as a lack of representation in the Estates Général. Marie-Madeleine had to concede that they would always be outvoted due to the structure of the system.The price of bread had gone up again and Marie-Madeleine feared another bread riot. The women of the working class would instigate these whenever the prices got too high. It didn't affect her family that much as her husband had done well as a silk merchant. There was an assembly outside the Church of Sainte Geneviève; the working women saw her as their own saint. They were there in support of the Estates Général and inadvertently her husband. They were here some days and in front of City Hall other days. “Maman, why are there so many people here?” Marie-Madeleine asked. “They're here supporting your father,” her mother replied. “Move along, we've got to get home soon. Your little sister is waiting.” They made their way down La Rue Clovis back to their apartment. Marie-Madeleine was taking her daughters out less and less these days and refused to take her youngest out at all. There were groups of people amassing on every street, and there were more people begging for food, for work, for money. Food prices were going up, as were taxes. There was so much unrest among the people and many with an overabundance of time on their hands due to the lack of jobs. There were often meetings held at their house. Her husband was among one of the liberal social reformers and he invited many like-minded people over for meetings. Ambroise frequently held meetings in the house with other like-minded individuals. She would continually find Sophie eavesdropping in on the meetings, entranced by what was going on. After a few tries she gave up on trying to keep her away – Sophie would always find a way to sneak back to them. None of her other daughters took any notice of the meetings except to complain that they couldn’t use the front room during these times. Sophie, despite her age, had a keen interest in the tumultuousness happening on the streets of Paris. And she had the opportunity to get the latest news from her father often in these meetings. Ambroise found it amusing that his 13-year-old daughter took such a keen interest in politics. At least this was all she was doing, Marie-Madeleine t[...]

WOOT WOOT I'm going to the Spring APS meeting


So my research prof has asked if I would be interested in presenting my research into differences in performance between men and women on the Force Concept Inventory, a test of basic understanding of Newtonian principles administered at the beginning and end of algebra and calculus based introductory physics courses, at the 11th Annual Meeting of the Northwest Section of APS.

While I'm not interested in going into Education Research and I'm not doing this as a Senior Project (or actually getting credit at all for this this quarter) it is something that I approached him and the other prof who is working on Physics Education research with at the end of last quarter and am highly interested in. I actually chose to get into Physics partly because my dream job is working for the NSF on working on increasing accessibility and retention of women and girls in STEM fields, so it kind of makes sense that this is what I am now doing. (Even though I am now in the mathematics department and in love with group and field theory and research I would never turn down a job at the NSF doing that.)

I am really excited and may be paying out of pocket (since I will have graduated at the end of this quarter) for one credit of independent study to work on this and to get departmental funds to present this at the APS conference. We also talked about me presenting it at scholar's week since it comes after the APS conference and I will already have everything put together. Also, even though this is not a senior project and I'm not officially a physics major I agreed to present my findings to the Physics Department as studies have shown that non-traditional teaching methods, i.e. those that incorporate interactive sessions, show greater improvement in women's scores then in men's (men's scores generally improve well no matter what teaching method is used.)


I have to work on my presentation skills. Hopefully I will be able to post some of my findings here as I work on them more. I just received some new data so I'd like to add that first before I start talking about it publicly.

Reasons I shouldn't teach


I might turn out like this:


Chicago reawakening


Chicago CompassOriginally uploaded by union_clownI remembered a part of myself today, a part that went missing years ago that I didn't notice among all the clutter of trauma and flurry of running. It is a part of me that once reawakened caused me to mourn it's absence even though I never noticed that it had gone. It came back to me during my trip to The Field Museum with my dad (though I was left to myself most of the day as I "take too long" to go through an exhibit) where I spent the day wandering amid the relics of civilisations past and dinosaur bones, including the dinosaur that for the first half of my life was my beloved brontosaurus (now apatosaurus (I don't know if the Field Museum was calling it an apatosaurus growing up, all I know is that I called it a brontosaurus and had a brontosaurus lunchbox) Sidenote: brontosaurus shows no red squiggly line of bad spelling whereas apatosaurus does. Hmmmm). Amid the carvings and the idols of the ancient Aztecs I remembered that child like quality that I had lost for so many years: my need to experience things tactilely. When it was gone I do not remember. I do remember walking through Chicago and having to run my hands over every different kind of stone surface that I would meet. To not just see the buildings and hear the city, but to touch it, to know it, to feel it. I remember, back in art school, asking to run my hands over paintings that were not flat, always liking those with texture more then the others (and making them that way myself). To feel the complexity of emotion, the hidden layers where mistakes and old feelings were hidden away beneath a new coat of paint. To interact with something that was not just flat, and to me that makes it flat in more ways then one-funny for a printmaker, but rich and complex and layered. Knowing that whatever was buried there was just a few scrapes away from exposing itself to the world.It came to me staring at the first piece in the Aztec exhibit which was a statue of some unknown stone pockmocked with tiny craters. I knew that if I could just touch it my experience would be fuller. That I would somehow understand it more; that I would become more involved in the exhibit. So I did all that I could do: I imagined what it would feel like. I flipped through every single piece of rock that I had ever touched until I came across something that resembled the one standing in front of me. I recreated it's features, even the pieces that had succumbed to age and had fallen off and especially those that were crumbling. I continued to do this throughout the rest of the exhibit. Through the rest of the museum. Imagining what the ancient papyrus in the Egyptian exhibit must feel like, at one point actually getting to feel hieroglyphs. Touching the models, knowing that the texture was wrong but the topography right in my journey from the beginning of the earth.I missed this. I'm realising as I type this that I have been doing this to a small extent as I have visited my ancient old growth stands, but that is more like caressing an old friend. But these streets, these buildings, all these things that I encountered...they can be friends too. Possibly just acquaintances for a brief time, telling me their story and moving out of my life forever, but at least there will be that.A blog made by a disillusioned clown living in the Cascadia Free state. Mostly centering on calling out [...]