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The Baseball Diaries





Updated: 2013-01-14T04:47:42.886-08:00

 



edited p

2006-11-10T09:22:10.616-08:00

Last night's Yankees game was like watching "Vanilla Sky." Did that really happen? Did Javier Vazquez not make it out of the second? Did Omar Vizquel get 6 hits? Is C.J Nitkowski really on the Yankees? Did Peter Gammons tell a national TV audience that he'd have trouble sleeping because he was so excited to read the Post and Daily News? (Yes on all accounts). Wow, just a great game to watch. Add that to a 10-7 Sox victory and it's a race people. Yup, the same division that all the second-class sportscaster wannabees on ESPNEWS were all condesending about not too long ago has officially become a race. Yay.

Around the Majors...

Rick Ankiel is back! So if you're going to a Cardinals game and plan on sitting behind home plate, be sure to bring a really big glove.



F You! (Like a Hurricane)

2004-09-07T11:27:33.566-07:00

Some people don't hate the Yankees, which I find rather inexcusable unless a) they grew up somewhere near New York, b) they're Derek Jeter's cousin, c) they don't like baseball, or d) they're morons.

For instance, would any other professional sports franchise seek to get an automatic win because their scheduled opponent was trapped at home due to a hurricane? Hello? Any takers? It's a natural disaster. People got injured! Mobile homes got destroyed! My Grandparents' tree fell on their neighbor's house! And the Yankees brass goes on TV claiming that the Devil Rays decided UN PURPOSE to not make an earlier flight and leave their families back in Tampa to be all hurricaned and shit. Oh well, this is precisely why nice guys finish last. But hopefully the assholes will finish in second this year.

In a slightly related note, I feel absolutely terrible that every time the Red Sox beat the A's (or Patriots beat the Raiders for that matter), it's because of some sketchy call/non-call. Last night Manny Ramirez traps a Mark Kotsay fly ball and it's called an out. The A's flip out. Next inning Kotsay traps a fly ball (on an IDENTICAL play) and it's called a hit. Why can't we just beat them without all the drama? It's unsettling.

In an unrelated note, I just found out that the uber-annoying WNBA/John Jerry catchphrase jam of the summer, "Let's Get it Started" by the Black Eyed Peas appears on their album as "Let's Get Retarded." If I were a retarded fan of the WNBA and discovered this, I think I'd be really hurt. But now I just think it's really funny.





Indians 22. Yankees 0.

2006-11-10T09:18:58.850-08:00

Last night's Yankees game was like watching "Vanilla Sky." Did that really happen? Did Javier Vazquez not make it out of the second? Did Omar Vizquel get 6 hits? Is C.J Nitkowski really on the Yankees? Did Peter Gammons tell a national TV audience that he'd have trouble sleeping because he was so excited to read the Post and Daily News? (Yes on all accounts). Wow, just a great game to watch. Add that to a 10-7 Sox victory and it's a race people. Yup, the same division that all the second-class sportscaster wannabees on ESPNEWS were all condesending about not too long ago has officially become a race. Yay.

Around the Majors...

Rick Ankiel is back! So if you're going to a Cardinals game and plan on sitting behind home plate, be sure to bring a really big glove.

Ichiro is 49 hits away from the single-season record. That's 1.5 hits per game the rest of the way. And unlike Griffey taking 6-8 weeks to hit his 500th homer due to "media pressure," Ichiro doesn't speak English, making that problem moot.



The more you ignore them, the closer they get

2004-08-24T07:47:23.586-07:00

I like to think that I'm the only person in America who woke up this morning with the following two thoughts:

1. It's good to know that both the Yankees AND A's gave up on Ted Lilly, the only AL pitcher not named Tim Hudson who can consistently make the Red Sox look foolish.

2. I am very excited to purchase the new Butch Walker album during lunch.

But back to these Red Sox. 6.5 back is rather impressive considering how lost they looked just a few weeks back. The NY press was writing them off and preparing for a cakewalk to the AL East title. And sure that may happen, but at least it's interesting. And every single Yankee is injured and/or slumping.

And speaking of steriods - odd that the only members of the Yankees who caught the dreaded "parasite" this season (Giambi, Sheffield, K. Brown), are the ones who's names are caught up in pill talk, no? And though most of the league seems pretty clean this year (check out the non-muscles on Bret Boone and Ryan Klesko, when you get the chance), with nobody putting up eye-popping, anti-career trend numbers, there is one guy who bucks the trend. And Tijuana is just a short drive from L.A.

Taco Beltre, did you make a run for the border this spring?







Clemens probably still in Houston. Definitely still an Asshole.

2004-08-20T11:29:20.800-07:00

Rumor has it that tipsy TV Boston sports anchor Bob Lobel said that the Sox and Astros were close to a deal that would send Clemens back to Boston. Emphasis on rumor. More emphasis on tipsy.

There really isn't much more excitement that could happen to the Sox season at this point, so why not bring back the most hated athlete in the city for an encore performance? Oh, because Clemens probably has no interest in pitching more than 20 feet from his double-wide mansion down in Texas.

But Clemens back in Boston? Adding fuel to the unforgettable fire that is the 2004 Red Sox? As John Kerry, Kirsten Dunst and Gomez would say..."Bring it on."





Victor Zambrano on the DL. The idiocy of the Mets? Not on the DL.

2004-08-19T14:35:18.986-07:00

It's pretty hard for me to feel sorry for Mets fans what with that whole 1986 thing, but is there a worse run franchise in sports? Obviously the Clippers and San Diego Chargers and probably some pro soccer team are run badly, but the Mets operate in the same city as the Yankees, can pay an astronomical sum for players, and keep screwing up. Case in point - this trade deadline. It's hard to believe that 19 days ago, the Mets thought it would be a good idea to pick up two mediocre pitchers in Kris Benson and Victor Zambrano for a pile of prospects and the vastly overrated Ty Wigginton.

Now the Mets have NO shot at the postseason, Benson has had two uber-crap starts and one good start, and now Victor Zambrano is on the DL. At least he can't walk anyone there.

Oh, and rumor has it the super kid they traded for him will be in the big leagues with Tampa next week. And if Scott Kazmir does indeed come up next week, the Devil Rays will have as many teenagers on their roster as the Olson twins' parents.

And the Mets? Um, at least Mike Cameron is playing WAY above expectation. And Tom Glavine hasn't been in a cab accident since last week! Let's Go Mets!



Holy $%&@! It's My First Blog!

2004-08-19T14:10:02.406-07:00

Why Blog? Why Baseball?

At some point not too long ago, a good friend and I were discussing the plight of good/readable/unbiased baseball writing that discussed things other than stats no real baseball fan has ever heard of. Honestly, I've been following baseball since 1982. I was 6. Do I really need to know what a player's VORP is? No, nor do I give a shit what a VORP is anyway.

The final straw was when a noted ESPN columnist - I won't say his name, but it rhymes with Bob Neyer - discussed the general worthlessness of Todd Walker shortly after Walker singlehandedly carried the Red Sox through a good portion of the 2003 Postseason. Why? Because Walker's defense was so bad that blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Whatver Bob, those homers were cool.

Anyway, I don't want to read that, and neither should you. So let's make this fun. As Crash Davis once said, "Baseball is an egg. Treat it like one." Or something like that.

Now I'm gonna click "publish post" and attempt to do just that. Please bear with me.