Subscribe: Ask MetaFilter posts by Ethereal Bligh
Added By: Feedage Forager Feedage Grade B rated
Language: English
ago  anti smoking  anti  didn  don  high  indomethacin  might  much  page  pain  people  port  sex  sort  things  thought  year  years 
Rate this Feed
Rate this feedRate this feedRate this feedRate this feedRate this feed
Rate this feed 1 starRate this feed 2 starRate this feed 3 starRate this feed 4 starRate this feed 5 star

Comments (0)

Feed Details and Statistics Feed Statistics
Preview: Ask MetaFilter posts by Ethereal Bligh

Ask MetaFilter posts by Ethereal Bligh

Ask MetaFilter posts by Ethereal Bligh

Published: Thu, 31 May 2007 01:34:27 -0800

Last Build Date: Thu, 31 May 2007 01:34:27 -0800


What's my kink?

Thu, 31 May 2007 01:34:27 -0800

Do I have a (sexual) kink? Should I have a kink? If I do have a kink, how do I discover it? My sex life has always been pretty straightforward. I'm very open-minded and have tried the usual variety of relatively conventional stuff. What I haven't done, though, is any sort of play-acting, or BDSM, or even dressing up (me or my partner). I like and enjoy sex but, on the other hand, other than during my adolescence sex has never seemed to be nearly as important to me as it seems to be for many other people. It's not, for example, the most fun thing I can think of doing. I can get by without it for long stretches of time. And so sometimes I wonder if there's not some kind of sex out there waiting for me to discover that would be sort of like a revelation: "Oh, this is why so many peoples' lives revolve around sex!"

In my masturbatory fantasy life there's not really anything that I have thought of that has an unusually powerful stimulating effect on me. There's maybe one pretty common activity that I do quite like and the idea of which is moderately arousing to me—but not unusually so.

Do most people have little sexual kinks that powerfully turn them on and reliably get them off? If you have something like this, did you always have it and, if not, when and how did you become aware of it? For example, not ever having done any play-acting or even mild dominance/submissive stuff, I'm only able to "test" whether anything like that might be a particular turn-on to me by trying it out through my imagination. And nothing I've imagined seems to have any special appeal. But is that predictive? Would I only know if I actually tried it?

Also, I'm sex-positive and don't have, as far as I can tell, any sex-negative hang-ups. However, one reason I'm asking this question may be that I do have a bit of a hang-up about anything I think might be sort of silly. For example, role-playing. I think that maybe role-playing something might be a turn-on and fun, but I'm inhibited by a self-consciousness related to what seems silly about play-acting.

Finally, it's also the case that I've seen lots of porn and there's not been any particular kinky activity that really gets my blood pumping.

I'm not dating anyone now, but assuming I were dating someone, how could I explore new sexual territory, looking for something that really turns me on, without having any idea of what that might be?

Finding love. Failing that, sex. Failing that, a movie buddy.

Sat, 14 Oct 2006 18:49:49 -0800

Help me find love/sex/companionship. Here's a summary of my situation with more detail to follow inside: I'm middle-aged, male and heterosexual, haven't been involved in a serious relationship in five years, haven't slept with anyone in over a year, am formally disabled and mobility-impaired and use a cane, rely on social security disability income during this period while I use the related Medicare coverage to have several major joints replaced, am a native of the city I live in but have lived here this time around for only the last two years. A big problem is that I don't have a social life, not even a work-related version, and thus don't have opportunities to meet new people (meaning: women). I'm stymied as to how someone my age and in my situation might meet people. I've never thought myself to be physically unattractive (similarly, I've never thought myself to be notably attractive, either) and I still don't—but I do feel these days that my life situation is probably a turn-off to most women.

There's some things that confuse me, even if they shouldn't. For example, an old flame from high school tracked me down shortly after I moved here and last year we got together a few times. She was very attractive when she was young and is still fairly attractive at our age. But the same problem interfered with any potential relationship between us as it had 22 years ago: she's just not my type, really. So, despite my loneliness and the fact that she (excessively) adores me, I did what I knew was right and put a stop to things. But, hell, that was the only thing I had going and there's lots of nights when I question that decision and am tempted to call her (or rather, call her back as she leaves me messages every few months or so).

Over the years I've used various personals ads services, either in local alternative newspapers or on the Internet. Last year and into this year I had a ad going but didn't really have much luck with the few women that responded to my ad. Unlike most men, as I've heard, I responded to only two or three womens' ads as I found very, very few women that are my type.

I've been feeling really middle-aged lately. I also often feel sort of hopeless about finding love and happiness with someone, often imagining that I'm becoming that unmarried straight uncle. This is not at all the person I thought I'd be by this age. What to do?

Do Preferences about Anti-Smoking Legislation Have a Political Affiliation?

Sat, 22 Jul 2006 16:34:28 -0800

Do preferences about anti-smoking legislation have a political affiliation? I'd like to know whether anti-smoking initiatives (and anti-anti-smoking resistance to such) have a natural political affiliation in whatever political terms people think are relevant. If there are such affiliations, are those affiliations intrinsic? Or by popular perception? Do these differ nationally or regionally?

Googling was not terribly helpful for a variety of reasons. I found one relatively unrigorous study specific to the US—I'd like something more concrete. But personal opinion and persuasive arguments are very welcome.

Unexpected and Uncofingured Port Forwarding from Netgear Switch/Router

Sat, 20 May 2006 13:09:54 -0800

On my XP system, the recently installed Norton anti-worm app told me that my Netgear RP614v2 NAT-enabled router attempted to udp connect to my port number 2061 from its port 12024. However, there is no port fowarding or triggering enabled, nor is there a DMZ address configured at all. There is some port forwarding configured via UPnP...but not that one or to this IP. UPnP config in the Netgear does say one address/port is mapped to a different IP and it was configured by the Azureus bittorrent client via its UPnP plug-in. But, again, this is only one port and to a different IP than my XP machine (whose IP is static via DHPP). SPI is on, ping reply is off.

Also, remote configuration is not enabled on the Netgear. The router firmware is 29 2004.

How could this happen? Any ideas?

I know that UPnP is supposedly insecure, but I confess I've never researched the matter nor worried about it very much. Immediately after this incident, I've turned off UPnP in the Netgear config and switched the XP machine running Azureus to use a fixed IP address and configured port forwarding for that one port and IP.

Is indomethacin still being manufactured?

Wed, 10 May 2006 15:04:43 -0800

(Note: I'm in the US) My pharmacist this week was unable to fill my prescription for indomethacin. I was able to find it at another pharmacy; but several pharmacies are out of it and my regular pharmacist says that the manufacturer has stopped making it. Does anyone have any information about this? I'll consult my doctor, of course, but I doubt he'll know anything. My pharmacist didn't tell me much (actually, one of their staff said this was temporary, the other said it was permanent).

I'm very alarmed by this because nothing I've taken for my osteoarthritis (and related; results from collagen gene mutation) has worked as well as indomethacin. Vioxx is the only thing that has come close. Celebrex worked better than ibuprofen, but not as well as Vioxx did.

Because my pharmacist couldn't fill the scrip, I've gone about five days without the indomethacin and I can barely walk at all. It's a bit frightening to see how much the indomethacin has helped me—my disease is progressive and in the year since I switched to indomethacin it's gotten quite a bit worse. My doctor also prescribes a narcotic (was hydrocodone, now 65mg of codeine or whatever the dosage is in in the Tylenol #4) for me, as well; I've tried taking it both regularly and only when I've needed it for acute pain and, frankly, it doesn't help all that much. I'm taking four a day now as I don't have my indomethacin, and it's not doing much good. I mention this only to give a sense of why I'm alarmed at the possibility of not getting any more indomethacin.

Thanks to anyone with any information.

Computer Hardware Retailers

Sun, 25 Sep 2005 18:41:09 -0800

Any suggestions for the best hardcore computer (and related) hardware retailer with online ordering and US-based? And by "hardcore", what I mean is not the usual, but stuff like miscellaneous wiring, screws, hard drive cages, temperature sensors, stand-offs, whatever. You see where I'm going with this? This is why I'm asking. The more common stuff is easy to find. My dream would be something as extensive as McMaster-Carr but limited to computer stuff. Thanks.

Resurrect own page from abandoned site?

Wed, 22 Jun 2005 23:41:59 -0800

Back in 1994, I wrote up a web page on a famous mathematical puzzle; it was the second page to appear on it. It got wide noteriety, it's cited and linked widely. But two years ago I changed my ISP. ...and I didn't arrange for redirection. 'Cause they would have charged me for it. It had been the #1 link on Google for the problem, all the links to it are now dead.

I didn't really do anything about it at the time, thinking that, hell, I hadn't updated the page in years and I might as well let it die. And it was also one of those things where I was proud of myself for it, but at the same time sorta embarassed that I was. So, I thought, hey, let it die.

But I've changed my mind. I got a specific domain for it, and resurrected the page. Oh, a few months ago. (Although I'd made it available on my personal domain in response to a discussion of the problem last year).

One thing I thought I could do would be to Google for everyone that links to the (dead) page and email them with the new URL. Is that a good idea? Will it annoy the people I email? And it's probably unlikely that it will ever be Google's first link again, isn't it?

Does anyone have any other ideas? And, I guess, I'm asking whether people think that I should just leave it alone.


Wed, 23 Feb 2005 12:58:50 -0800

For those with it, what's your experience with hypertension? I've not seen a doctor yet, but rest assured I will very shortly. So this isn't intended to be any sort of substitute for getting adequate medical care.

Only a few weeks ago did it occur to me to start checking my blood pressure. I had gone to the ER a few times for things like kidney stones and, unsurprisingly, my BP was high then. The medical professionals and I attribtued it to the incredible pain I was experiencing. But, anyway, as I said, it occured to me a few weeks ago to start checking it under normal conditions to see if it is elevated. My dad, for past health reasons of his, has an automated one. And, the thing, it's really high. Over the course of a week, my blood pressure averaged (and didn't deviate much from) about 155 systolic, 115 diastolic. Occasionally both being upwards of those by about 10mmHg.

Doing a lot of web research, the diastolic seems to put me easily in "stage two" hypertension, where stage one and stage two seem to be the "official" designations. Some sources go further with stages three and four, in those my diastolic seems to place me in "stage three". So this seems awfully high. Is it really? Comparatively? I've also been told in the past, or read or something, that it is the diastolic that's the more important measurement. Is this true?

I did see a rheumotoligst last week for pain management and check-up of my skeletal condition (and we've brought out the big guns of opiates); the nurse there who took my BP said that mine was high enough to cause symptoms like headaches (which I do get a lot) and other things, but not high enough to cause the really bad symptoms. Of course, that's skipping over the question of whether I'm likely to drop dead any minute.

So, your experiences and knowledge?

How much are you like or different from your immediate family and relatives?

Sat, 08 Jan 2005 15:59:26 -0800

How much are you like or different from your immediate family and relatives? [MI] I'm in Kansas City for the holidays, visiting my mom, her husband, and my sister and brother-in-law. Anyway, last night we watched Bourne Identity and Franka Potenta's presence in the film made me think about Tykwer's films, and I mentioned them to my mom and her husband. I'm thinking they might like Lola, but also my mom, especially might like "The Princess and the Warrior". On the other hand, these are foreign films.

And then also, thinking of Tykwer, I thought about Heaven, which made me think of Kieslowski and The Decalogue. My sister and her husband are both evangelical ministers and I thought they might appreciate Decalogue (which I have back at home in Albuquerque).

Then, I sort of despaired, a little, thinking that all these foreign films and famous directors are, to them, "strange".

I bet I don't have a relative that's read, for example, Dosteyevski or Tolstoy.

My family is the usual mix of smart and average people, really. But, aside from my maternal grandmother who passed away three years ago (after having Alzheimer's and so, it seemed to me, she went away long ago), there's never been anyone in my faily that I could share these sorts of interests.

I've gone to school with people who've had family that had a high incidence of advanced degrees; this certainly isn't the case with mine. Seemed like in their cases they shared some of these same interests. And I know siblings who do.

In my dad's family, fitting it requires knowing all the most important stats for the Dallas Cowboys going back thirty years. So, um, I didn't relate well with them.

Anyone else feel like they're the odd person out? If so, how do you bridge that gap? At forty, it's a little late. But I tire of having all these interests and, well, just little things I mentiont that seem like I live in another universe.

On the upside, I had my mom and her husband watch almost 14 episodes from seasons two of Buffy, and my mom, especially, loved it. I also got them hooked on South Park, which they apparently regularly watch these days.

Migraine help

Wed, 15 Sep 2004 23:44:58 -0800

Help with migraine relief? ...when I'm stuck at home with no medicines that can help at all. I was so miserable today, I wanted to die. Soaking my head under a hot shower would help for small amounts of time—I must have had twelve showers today. Hurt too bad to sleep, was nauseated, etc.

Is there any kind of home remedy or therapy or anything that I could do when stuck in this situation where I could relieve the pain just enough to, you know, not want to be dead? Just enough to move it from intolerable to tolerable? Because of my chronic joint pain and stuff, I have a really high pain tolerance...but a bad migraine is just something I can't distance myself from. It's very frustrating.