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Phillyist



Phillyist is a website about Philadelphia. MoreEditors: Jillian Ashley Blair Ivey, Andrew JohnstonAssociate Editors: Ross Currie, Allison Krumm, Joe RossPublisher: Gothamist



Last Build Date: Mon, 31 Jan 2011 17:00:50 -0500

Copyright: Copyright 2012
 



So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish

2011-01-31T17:00:50-05:00

Just days before Live 8, in late June of 2005, the inimitable John Carroll, Phillyist's first editor, let the world know that Phillyist was live and online. Now five years, six months, three days, and nearly 13,000 posts later, it is my official duty to provide one last post for Phillyist. [ more › ]



Thanks for Four Years of Awesome

2011-01-31T16:00:00-05:00

It was a (presumably) cold November day in 2006 when I made my humble debut on Phillyist with a post called Elevating My Frustration. It was about elevator etiquette. I've come a long way since then. I featured interesting Twitter users and hope some of them will follow us into the future at @keypulp. I wrote not one but two posts on the mysterious Toynbee tiles. The local sleuths who spent years investigating them were the subject of a Sundance-winning documentary called Ressurect Dead: The Mystery of the Toynbee Tiles. [ more › ]



Blogged Around Philly: Farewell Edition

2011-01-28T15:30:00-05:00

Who needs an RSS feed when you have us? The best from this week in the 215 blogosphere... [ more › ]



Good Advice From a Bad Person

2011-01-28T12:30:01-05:00

In which our Bad Person *tear* says goodbye. [ more › ]



A Little Friendly Advice For Our South Philly Neighbors

2011-01-27T11:00:00-05:00

As we make our way to work in the aftermath of yet another winter storm with no running buses, many of us will be digging out cars and braving the treacherous streets of Philadelphia. Later, upon returning home from work, far too many people will be faced with the reality that some a-hole stole their perfectly sculpted parking space during the day, forcing them to park presumably near the Sports Complex. [ more › ]



The 2011 State of the Union

2011-01-26T11:00:00-05:00

Under normal circumstances, we here at Phillyist post a video each day that in some way pertains to Philadelphia or its surrounding area. Since all that's really going on today is snow, snow, freezing rain, and more snow, we're going to go national instead and share last night's State of the Union address in its entirety, in case you missed it or wish to argue with your computer monitor a little more. Whether you're Democrat, Republican, Independent, or a Teabagger, take a look. Even if you don't agree with what's being said, it's important for you to have an understanding of the political atmosphere in this country right now, if only so that you can go complain to Twitter about it later. [ more › ]



Introducing ... KeyPulp!

2011-01-25T17:00:00-05:00

As we teased on Twitter yesterday and revealed to Technically Philly this morning, January 31 is not the last you'll be seeing of the Phillyist editors and staff. True, Phillyist won't be updated after 5:00 p.m. next Monday, but, as that song we got stuck in your heads last week goes: "every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end." [ more › ]



En Garde!

2011-01-25T11:00:00-05:00

This past Saturday, Penn hosted the Philadelphia Invitational, a season-opening men's and women's fencing event that saw fencing squads from schools such as Duke and UNC don their plastrons and knickers and do sabered battle in University City. Penn's men's team, ranked seventh nationally, was totally dominant. They went a perfect 6–0 on the day, only coming close to defeat against Duke. Here's a quick video recap with an interview with Penn junior Vidur Kapur. Errol Flynn ain't got shit on these bucklers of swash. [ more › ]



Singing Semisonic

2011-01-21T16:45:10-05:00

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. [ more › ]



Good Advice From a Bad Person

2011-01-21T15:30:01-05:00

In which our Bad Person goes to the grocery store. [ more › ]

Dear GOOTA,

Thanks for writing. Sorry I had to edit your piece a little—anything in brackets is mine—this isn't Adult Swim here in my column quite yet. But I appreciated your vivid and impassioned description of Wal-Mart shoppers carrying on their lineage.

This isn't so much a question as a rant, albeit a rant close to my heart. I guess "why do families insist on grocery shopping together?" is the question. I can tell by the question mark at the end. So why do families insist on grocery shopping together? Probably because kids are brats and they will whine and complain and throw a tantrum if their parents bring home the wrong flavor of Gushers. And those parents are wimps indulging their beautiful, special snowflakes' every whim.

"Caleb, you know you can't have Pop Tarts, what with all that gluten ... ok Caleb, just this once. Caleb, stop yelling at me! Caleb, please stop! Fine Caleb, but your tennis instructor is going to hear about this, see how you feel about Pop Tarts during your grueling ground strokes drills. Okay, I am sorry Caleb. You're just expressing yourself. You're a beautiful snowflake. I'm so proud of you. Are you listening? Are you sexting again?"

So, basically, that's how it goes.

It's not just Wal-Mart, or other lower tier stores. In fact, I'd much rather be at Wal-Mart than Whole Foods. I feel like the Wal-Marts of the world at least inspire the human cattle subconscious and people move through them lifelessly but somewhat efficiently.

Oh, but what a fresh hell Whole Foods is. Abandon all hope, ye who enter the vegetable section of a high end grocer. It is like their brains die when they get around organic zucchinis. There is no urgency or desire to be out of that store. The customers at my local Whole Foods seem to be there to be there. They carry on long conversations that would kill anyone with functioning mental faculties or social graces, standing two or three abreast in the organic corn product aisle. I have never felt so Falling Down as I have in that gloomy pit of overpriced agrarian foodstuffs. You know, it's really great that you found a job despite your head of disgusting dreads, but I just want you to check me out instead of lecturing me on my non-reusable grocery bags. Thanks. Just for that, I'm getting plastic. I hope it chokes a goose.

Children, adults, Wal-Mart, Whole Foods, you can't win for losing. You really have no good options for this.

My advice to you is to leave all weapons in your car, try not to count the people's items in the fifteen-items-or-less lane, and pray to God Fresh Direct comes to your town soon.

I usually end these with a "I hope this helps," but this time I can't in good conscience. I know grocery shopping is always going to be terrible; just don't murder anyone.

Tony




Blogged Around Philly: Munching on Mustafa Edition

2011-01-21T14:30:00-05:00

Who needs an RSS feed when you have us? The best from this week in the 215 blogosphere... [ more › ]



Prepare to Be Self-Conscious Every Time You Speak for the Rest of the Day

2011-01-21T11:00:00-05:00

Surrounded by it every day, we often forget that our region has a unique accent. It's not until it's blatantly pointed out that we realize we collectively over-emphasize long "O" vowel sounds and unnecessarily abbreviate syllables. Today's video is all about our accent. It's hilarious at first, but kind of sad by the end. Do we really say "wooder?" [ more › ]



And Now, For Something Completely Different

2011-01-20T11:00:00-05:00

Due to a crippling shortage of local videos not focused on fires, murdered police officers, Glenn Beck, or abortion in today's internet, we've decided to run a campaign of visual distraction. May we present: a little girl and her dog. [ more › ]



Reforming Education, For Real This Time

2011-01-18T11:00:00-05:00

For years upon years, the American education system has been in a rate of steady decline. Fewer students graduate high school per year as standards focus more and more on forcing knowledge of "basic skills" through the same old, non-engaging standardized testing scheme. [ more › ]



So This is What Lou Williams Does in His Free Time

2011-01-17T11:00:00-05:00

Lou Williams, a point guard with the 76ers since the 2005-06 season, isn't what most people consider a star basketball player. A high school phenom who forewent college to enter the NBA Draft, Williams has been hovering between below average and average for the length of his career. In fact, a recent post on Liberty Ballers revealed that Williams somehow has the fourteenth-highest usage rate among NBA players. Simply put, usage rate measures a player's percentage of the game in which he has the ball, or his "ball-hogginess." For a superstar like a Kobe or a Lebron, a high usage rate makes sense. For Lou Williams, having the fourteenth highest usage rate in the league while averaging thirteen-ish points per game signifies the coming of the apocalypse. [ more › ]